Not sure if this counts
But I once dated a man who turned out to have a prosthetic hand, having lost his left hand, just above the writst, in a farm machinery accident.

I don't think I can adequately describe the feeling as he used his stump to pleasure me from behind (more comfortable for both of us). It felt like an enormous, ever-rigid, 10-inch cock. And even once Kevin had wanked himself off, he could continue thrusting long into the night – or afternoon one time.

He was a lovely guy and we had lots of fun, but I called it day eventually, as we really had nothing in common, beyond the joy we gave each other in the bedroom.

And when people ask you “What on earth do you see in him?”, I realised that the answer was: “His stumpy left arm” which even I had to admit was probably not a sound basis for a long term relationship.

Still…I do miss that arm sometimes.
(K.W.A. Knickers With Attitude, Wed 23 May 2012, 15:11, 20 replies)

Who says romance is dead?
On the other hand
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 23 May 2012, 15:21, closed)

It was nothing serious, just a bit of 'armless fun.

( Ghoti Fingers, Thu 24 May 2012, 8:03, closed)

He spends night and day,
pleasuring you with his stump, then gets to wank himself off? Are you Catholic, or something?
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Wed 23 May 2012, 15:26, closed)

So he pleasured you, after wanking himself off - but you gave each other joy?
Sounds like he got dealt a crap hand there.
(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Wed 23 May 2012, 15:27, closed)

When you say he 'turned out' to have a prosthetic hand,
at what point was it not obvious?
(username failed moderation, Wed 23 May 2012, 15:33, closed)

You've got to hand it to him really
then again, if it was me, i'd be up in arms...
(King Nightmare, Wed 23 May 2012, 15:33, closed)

I bet he always felt a right tit

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 23 May 2012, 15:33, closed)

Well
We did do other things too, but they wouldn't fit in this topic, so you'll have to use your dirty imaginations.
(K.W.A. Knickers With Attitude, Wed 23 May 2012, 15:39, closed)

Handy!

(The Luggage is haunted..., Wed 23 May 2012, 15:40, closed)

-y

+kerchief
(all my scars face forward possesses 2.5% of a hyperalloy combat chassis, Wed 23 May 2012, 23:52, closed)

Perhaps you shouldn't have given him the elbow?

(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Wed 23 May 2012, 15:45, closed)

Man
you TOTALLY missed the chance to go to kids' parties and pretend to be a ventriloquist act.
(Bappage, Wed 23 May 2012, 15:56, closed)

Haaaaaaaaahahahahahahahahaha

( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:10, closed)

Agreed...

Best one yet.

*Claps hand*
(Mr Twisty Cheeky The worst kept secret in B3ta..., Wed 23 May 2012, 16:15, closed)

Ha!
That's excellent.

Mummy, mummy, look! A ventr... venitro... man with a talking dolly!
*schlorp*
Waaaaaaaah...
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:20, closed)

hahahaha...
all very Zen.....

What is the sound of one hand...fapping?
(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Wed 23 May 2012, 16:26, closed)

Excellent!

(K.W.A. Knickers With Attitude, Wed 23 May 2012, 17:05, closed)

Best reply ever!

( parttimedogfish is a Born-Again Reincarnationist, Thu 24 May 2012, 9:11, closed)

Winner

( Linbox has a serious dunk habit, Wed 23 May 2012, 17:45, closed)

Cheap joke
Brings new meaning to the term "A swift one off the wrist"
(Classic Ray, Thu 24 May 2012, 7:39, closed)