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This is a question Bad Smells

"I once left the world's stinkiest guff in a lift before sending it down to a group of Germans, all bustling to be first in the doors upon its arrival," giggles Boarders. Tell us your stories involving farts, noxious gasses and unpleasant smells.

(, Fri 17 Jan 2014, 11:56)
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Now as you know I am sans bumole
Now whatever part of the large intestine they removed must have been solely responsible for removing the foulest smells from your shit leaving it only moderately gag-tastic.

The effluence that currently emerges from my body could be sold to the Syrian rebels and used to wipe out a small city. Just stick one of my used bags into a catapult device and launch into an offending city and watch the fuckers come out waving white flags quicker than the french with the 3rd Reich on their doorstep.

The worst is hangover bag, it is the smell of satan's breath himself. Now usually there are little filters that let the gas out and they actually filter out the smell but when they get wet they stop releasing gas. So I wake up in the morning with a bag like the Hindenburg. Now imagine how bad one hangover fart is, I've got a bag of the fuckers. Nothing will induce vomiting quicker than a bag of hangover farts/shit.

tl:dr, No bumhole, bags smell of death.
(, Tue 21 Jan 2014, 10:00, 30 replies)
Oh, the humanity!
Try lighting the bag, for science.
(, Tue 21 Jan 2014, 10:37, closed)
HAHA I have already
Yes I can confirm it was like a methane powered blow torch. I started to panic when I realized the bag was on fire. PS, hitting a shit filled bag to put a fire out. Not smart.
(, Tue 21 Jan 2014, 10:45, closed)
actual lol

(, Tue 21 Jan 2014, 11:06, closed)
You jebber.
(, Tue 21 Jan 2014, 11:27, closed)
I actually have a poor poor video of it on my phone
I for some reason narrate in a slightly camp German doctors accent. JA!
(, Tue 21 Jan 2014, 12:43, closed)
All scat porn should be narrated in camp German.

(, Tue 21 Jan 2014, 12:49, closed)
Yeah the church of fudge scarred me for life.

(, Tue 21 Jan 2014, 12:51, closed)
I think the traditional way
of dealing with that is to put it on the neighbours doorstep, ring his bell then run away.
(, Tue 21 Jan 2014, 12:56, closed)
^ geniune lolz
Thanks :)
(, Tue 21 Jan 2014, 15:49, closed)

(, Tue 21 Jan 2014, 11:47, closed)
I hope this wins

(, Tue 21 Jan 2014, 12:12, closed)
If you're not seeing anyone at the moment
can I move in with you?
(, Tue 21 Jan 2014, 13:12, closed)
well theres not much room
what with all the bags of poo and cats.
(, Tue 21 Jan 2014, 13:44, closed)
You keep your cats in bags?

(, Tue 21 Jan 2014, 15:52, closed)
its far easier and the poo keeps the warm

(, Wed 22 Jan 2014, 10:44, closed)
i wish you'd post a sans bumhole story every week
this to win!
(, Tue 21 Jan 2014, 13:31, closed)
They should scrap /qftw altogether and introduce /namelesshasnoarsehole instead.

(, Tue 21 Jan 2014, 14:01, closed)
Weekly tales of my adventures with no barking spider

(, Tue 21 Jan 2014, 14:06, closed)
I think he should have his own TV show.
The adventures of No Bumhole Man.

No Bumhole Man: 'My stoma senses are tingling - someone's in trouble! To the poomobile!'
Woman in distress: 'Help me no bumhole man, I'm being robbed!'
No Bumhole Man: 'Have no fear lady, I'll save you!
No Bumhole Man: 'JUSTICE!'
(, Tue 21 Jan 2014, 14:09, closed)
About time that Toxic Crusader was revived for TV.

(, Tue 21 Jan 2014, 14:12, closed)
Oh my dear christ
I just broke in to full on face streaming tears of laughter in front of my bewildered office at the sheer thought of the no bumole man TV show!
(, Tue 21 Jan 2014, 14:16, closed)
Can anyone animate to a good level, we have something viral on our hands.........

(, Tue 21 Jan 2014, 14:18, closed)
You should probably wash them, then.

(, Tue 21 Jan 2014, 14:26, closed)
No but I feel I should be entitled to a hefty cut of any profits

(, Tue 21 Jan 2014, 15:29, closed)
probably correct there.

(, Wed 22 Jan 2014, 8:59, closed)
You mean...
No Bumhole Man: 'My stoma senses are tingling - someone's in trouble! To the poomobile!'
Pissboy (sidekick): 'You mean your Honda Accord?'
No Bumhole Man: '...Yes.'
(, Tue 21 Jan 2014, 23:07, closed)

"I contend we are both bumhole-less. I just have one fewer bumhole than you do. When you understand why you dismiss all the other possible bumholes, you will understand why I dismiss yours."
(, Tue 21 Jan 2014, 15:18, closed)

(, Tue 21 Jan 2014, 15:49, closed)
Well I CAN fit a king size Toblerone up there.

(, Tue 21 Jan 2014, 18:24, closed)
You're the man that Gonz will at one level never be, but on another, probably will be.

(, Tue 21 Jan 2014, 18:55, closed)

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