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This is a question Tightwads

There's saving money, and there's being tight: saving money at the expense of other people, or simply for the miserly hell of it.

Tell us about measures that go beyond simple belt tightening into the realms of Mr Scrooge.

(I helped save b3ta! chthonic, Thu 23 Oct 2008, 13:58)
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here I am
banging on about poverty, and you lower the tone!
(I helped save b3ta! crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Mon 27 Oct 2008, 9:52, 2 replies)
It is what he's here for
after all.

*doffs cap to al*

Green knickers are about as sexy as me in a vest.
(I helped save b3ta! Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Mon 27 Oct 2008, 9:56, closed)
Mmmmmmm
Bert in a vest

*spluffs uncontrollably*

Oh noes! I got it in CHCBs mouth, nose, ears and anus!
(Bazongaloid, Mon 27 Oct 2008, 9:57, closed)
My hairy shoulders are on display
when I wear vests.

Still, they could be my love-handles, as I'm too skinny to have proper ones.
(I helped save b3ta! Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Mon 27 Oct 2008, 10:00, closed)
I know
I'm so, so sorry. I've disgusted rachelswipe and now i've disgusted you.

*isn't really sorry*

*is still imagining green gym knickers*
(Bazongaloid, Mon 27 Oct 2008, 9:56, closed)
You really are a foul, disgusting man.
You're making me want to throw up yesterdays breakfast.
(I helped save b3ta! Cawl, Mon 27 Oct 2008, 10:01, closed)
There's nowt disgusting
about CHCB in green knickers, she's a fine Irish lady, they wear green all the time.
(I helped save b3ta! Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Mon 27 Oct 2008, 10:02, closed)
I just meant
Al, in general, makes me heave.
(I helped save b3ta! Cawl, Mon 27 Oct 2008, 10:04, closed)
Don't insult my woman
She's a beautiful, fine figure of a woman, and i love her.

Or we'll have to have pistols at dawn.
(I helped save b3ta! Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Mon 27 Oct 2008, 10:06, closed)
How about knives?
I'd challenge you to a knife-fight quite happily.
(I helped save b3ta! Cawl, Mon 27 Oct 2008, 10:09, closed)
How about
spaffing cocks at dawn.

CHCB can judge who's is the best.

Spaff that it, not cock. I wouldn't have a chance otherwise.
(Bazongaloid, Mon 27 Oct 2008, 10:12, closed)
Don't put yourself down
When I met Mrs al, I could see from the twinkle in her eye that she was a very satisfied young woman.

Of course, she could be getting that satisfaction elsewhere, but you get the idea.
(I helped save b3ta! Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Mon 27 Oct 2008, 10:15, closed)
Hmmmm
thanks for that. I think that twinkle may have been because she was drunk.

I fear we may have disgusted CHCB away from her own thread.

Or maybe she's working *shudders*
(Bazongaloid, Mon 27 Oct 2008, 10:23, closed)
CHCB loves us
like illegitimate children, she could never be disgusted by us.
(I helped save b3ta! Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Mon 27 Oct 2008, 11:55, closed)
Ok
knives it is. I've got a three inch Kitchen Devil with your name on it.

Not literally, but personalised knives would be a nice christmas present for you.
(I helped save b3ta! Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Mon 27 Oct 2008, 10:14, closed)
That would be a lovely present for me :)
So... a kitchen devil...

I'll use my Fairborne-Sykes Fighting Knife, in that case :)

Five inches, and designed to cause maximum slicing to veins and arteries, with minimum stabbing effort.
(I helped save b3ta! Cawl, Mon 27 Oct 2008, 10:18, closed)
Sounds very efficient
but my kitchen devil can do carrots and cheese... so.. er... if you're made of carrots and cheese I can chop you up into little chunks and make a not very nice sandwich of some sort.
(I helped save b3ta! Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Mon 27 Oct 2008, 10:19, closed)
But
by the simple addition of some Branston Pickle, said boring sandwich would become quite tasty.

Or if you had some corned beef and ketchup I would be tempted to eat Kaol myself.
(Bazongaloid, Mon 27 Oct 2008, 10:21, closed)
Er...
I'm not made of cheese OR carrots, so... *shrugs*
(I helped save b3ta! Cawl, Mon 27 Oct 2008, 10:23, closed)
What about
Broccoli? are you made of broccoli? Or courgettes? Or peppers of any colour (though green ones are pointless and bitter)?

Hang on, are you made of green peppers then?
(Bazongaloid, Mon 27 Oct 2008, 10:26, closed)
Yeah,
My heart is a green pepper, pumping bitterly and pointlessly.
(I helped save b3ta! Cawl, Mon 27 Oct 2008, 10:29, closed)
How
poetic
(I helped save b3ta! Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Mon 27 Oct 2008, 11:02, closed)
Yeah
like your mum.

*goes all /talk*
(Bazongaloid, Mon 27 Oct 2008, 11:03, closed)
So's
your face.

...and your Mum's face.

I win.
(I helped save b3ta! Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Mon 27 Oct 2008, 11:54, closed)

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