SONG THREAD
I'll start, you carry on...

"If you're happy and you know it..."
( I have run out of coke is a little sweaty, Thu 30 Oct 2008, 15:40, 36 replies)

.
Piss off?

Hehe
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 30 Oct 2008, 15:41, closed)

now youre getting it
...if youre happy and you know it...
( I have run out of coke is a little sweaty, Thu 30 Oct 2008, 15:43, closed)

git tae fook!

(lost, Thu 30 Oct 2008, 15:49, closed)

if your happy and you know it
and you really want to beat it to death with a big stick
(Halfy By light alone, Thu 30 Oct 2008, 15:52, closed)

take out my cock
and blow it!
( SpikeyPickle wishes he was mabazaritchie, Thu 30 Oct 2008, 15:52, closed)

Wank furiously
into Enzymes gaping anus?
(Bazongaloid, Thu 30 Oct 2008, 15:45, closed)

doesnt really scan..
try harder

(was it gaping as you just pulled out?)
( I have run out of coke is a little sweaty, Thu 30 Oct 2008, 15:46, closed)

It always gapes
It's an unfortunate condition he suffers from.
(Bazongaloid, Thu 30 Oct 2008, 15:48, closed)

Al
Photos or it didn't happen.
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Thu 30 Oct 2008, 15:48, closed)

Are you sure
you want to make that statement?
(Bazongaloid, Thu 30 Oct 2008, 15:53, closed)

Why?
Have you got photos?
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Thu 30 Oct 2008, 16:02, closed)

grope a bum
bodypart or urban camper.
(lost, Thu 30 Oct 2008, 15:47, closed)

Do all of the above
While wearing a purple tutu and a beret on your head.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 30 Oct 2008, 15:53, closed)

If you're happy and you know it
and you really want to show it, if you're happy and you know it, cunt the fuck.
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Thu 30 Oct 2008, 16:07, closed)

I'd
cunt your fuck. And you'd love it.
(Bazongaloid, Thu 30 Oct 2008, 16:10, closed)

We'd all love that, al
I'd really like to teabag you right now, and I'm not sure why.
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Thu 30 Oct 2008, 16:12, closed)

It's because
I have, on occasion, been known to suck a golf ball through a hosepipe.
(Bazongaloid, Thu 30 Oct 2008, 16:15, closed)

Mrs Monkeysex can actually do that
Mind you, she is an industrial size vacuum cleaner.
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Thu 30 Oct 2008, 16:20, closed)

I'm quite
disappointed. I expected more of b3ta QOTWers. This isnt talk you know. I wanted more funtime than there. I have to go away and have a good think and a little cry. Tonight, whilst you eat your dinner, staring at the little woman, thinking, "my god I've made a huge mistake, I dont even fancy her sister anymore", instead I want you to think of me - all disappointed and covered in faeces.

what? I'm very upset.
( I have run out of coke is a little sweaty, Thu 30 Oct 2008, 16:11, closed)

You made me chuckle
Tonight, while I'm wanking into my cold soup, alone and afraid, I'll think of you, and it'll warm the cockles of my rectum.
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Thu 30 Oct 2008, 16:13, closed)

Tonight
while I'm wanking into the cockles of your rectum, I'll think of you and then I'll think of even more ways to degrade and humiliate you.
(Bazongaloid, Thu 30 Oct 2008, 16:15, closed)

Are you being mean to me?
I LIKE it.

Touch me, then spit in my mouth, make me cry, wipe your shitty cock on my face, call me girls' names, defecate in my bed, piss in my eyes, I want you bad tonight, baby.
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Thu 30 Oct 2008, 16:22, closed)

you dirty
fucking cunt. "Call me girls names"??? WTF? You vile pervert.
( I have run out of coke is a little sweaty, Thu 30 Oct 2008, 16:24, closed)

Yeah
that's it, keep going. Bertie's been a naughty little girl.

Lock me in the coal shed, fist my anus, tie me to the radiator and beat me while we listen to 'Lady in Red' on repeat.
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Thu 30 Oct 2008, 16:26, closed)

enoughs enough
I'm reporting you to the BBC's trust or whatever the cunt it was that got Brand done. They'll put an end to this. You'll never be on Radio again after this. You'll probably only ever work for the very lucrative commercial stations, channel 4, several publishers and still continue to fuck anyone you want whilst simulataneously not giving a shit. Youre FUCKED.
( I have run out of coke is a little sweaty, Thu 30 Oct 2008, 16:31, closed)

AAAAAAAAAIIIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEE....!

I'm not on the radio, I'm on the b3ternet :(

You don't have to fist my anus, but I know you want to really.
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Thu 30 Oct 2008, 16:33, closed)

I am DISGUSTED
I am not paying my b3ta licence fee until this filth is removed. Even though I haven't read it. The Daily Mail told me it was DISGUSTING though.
(Binary Solo loves a bit of algebra, Thu 30 Oct 2008, 16:39, closed)

Oh it was disgusting
but he was smiling the whole way through it. Smiling like a wanking chimp. And then he threw it through the bars of the radiator into my face. My FACE! Some of it went in my mouth. The taste made my winky feel funny like when I see Kate Garroway on the television.
(Bazongaloid, Thu 30 Oct 2008, 16:43, closed)

Mmmm...
Kate Garroway.

She sure got a wide mouth, I wonder how many cheese straws she could fit in there?

I'd proper felch that Penny Smith too.
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Thu 30 Oct 2008, 16:48, closed)

Penny Smith
would be teh filth, she'd want it front, back sideways and downwards all at the same time. She'd be smearing rotting whale blubber all over herself screaming "DO ME HARDER, HARDER YOU BITCH, HARDER"
(Bazongaloid, Thu 30 Oct 2008, 17:38, closed)

Too right she would
and she'd be saying it all out of one side of her face, that way she always seems to talk, and I'd be all like, 'Yeah, Penny, you filthy bitch, you love it.'
and she'd all be like, 'LOLZ Bert, you done gone had a spaff in my eyes. Mind the cat,' and then she'd produce a Tabby from her rancid flesh hole.
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Thu 30 Oct 2008, 17:47, closed)

*sings*
Penny Smith is in my ears, and in my eyes. There, beneath the blue suburban swingers' club.

*daydreams*
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Thu 30 Oct 2008, 17:56, closed)

Start a campaign to have me banned
I'd really like that, please? Oh, go on?

I'll sleep with your granddaughter...? -or if you don't have one, or even any kids of your own yet, I guess I'll just have to rape your ovaries.
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Thu 30 Oct 2008, 16:51, closed)

Leave my poor innocent ovaries alone
Just cos you can see them half-naked on EggySluts.com
(Binary Solo loves a bit of algebra, Thu 30 Oct 2008, 17:05, closed)

... clap your hands!
oh are we not playing that game anymore?
(bobming, Thu 30 Oct 2008, 17:25, closed)

Eggysluts.com?
You're so cheap! I prefer the more sophisticated semi-dressed reproductive organs of thisiswhereyourbabiescomefrom-mysnatch.org
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Thu 30 Oct 2008, 17:48, closed)