The tobacco companies are behind the smoking ban
It has been suggested that the nazi fascist jolly sensible smoking ban was a collaboration between the government and the tobacco companies. It works like this:

You go outside for a smoke. You feel like a bit of a sad loser puffing away in the pouring rain while your mate is left by him/herself to look after your table. So you take a few quick drags and leave at least a third of your fag unsmoked. Result, you want another one more quickly than you usually would, and go outside again and do the same thing. End result: you smoke more cigarettes than you did before the ban, the tobacco companies get more money, and the government gets more tax.

I know for sure that the person who suggested this is a nutter. It was me.
(eesnahk, Thu 27 Aug 2009, 14:35, 6 replies)

Or, my own take on it
You go outside for a cigarette. You realise that the most interesting people are out there smoking fags. You stay outside the pub/club all night with your new friends smoking twice as many cigarettes as you normally would.
( rofl harris, Thu 27 Aug 2009, 15:01, closed)

 
Yeah and maybe you will eventually convince your non-smoking mates to pick up the habit lest they must sit inside on their own not smoking.
(aroe_m0rre, Thu 27 Aug 2009, 15:23, closed)

also,
your non-smoking mates get bored of sitting inside watching your drinks and take up smoking themselves so they have an excuse to carry on socialising.
(bblgoose, Fri 28 Aug 2009, 8:08, closed)

I know you're joking but...
Strangely, I know somebody who has done just exactly that - they started smoking because they didn't want to be the loner on the table in the pub on their own...
(richietheg my dad buries dead people. he's an undertaker., Fri 28 Aug 2009, 22:25, closed)

That makes no sense.
Less than 25% of people smoke. The chances that a person would find themselves in a social group where they are the only non-smoker are just miniscule. This friend of yours must have been jolly unlucky to end up in that situation.
(Seance Trumpet has got no beef with a man enjoying a croissant, Sun 30 Aug 2009, 0:33, closed)

Oddly...
Ran into a woman a few years ago who I had once dated. SHe was now smoking. Seems she realized that at her non-smoking workplace, the smokers got to go outside and enjoy the spring/summer/fall air a few times a day -- sort of like recess.

Then winter came, and she found that she was hooked. . .
(ChiTown Guy Dating when 35+: sane, single, attractive - pick 2, Mon 31 Aug 2009, 0:48, closed)