Blow your nose - WITHOUT blowing it
Slightly tricky, but basically if you have a snotty nose get some tissue and twist it up into a line.

now, carefully put it to your nose (use a mirror) and get some snot near one end of it. Yes! that's right! get the tissue turning round ensuring you have a hand a each end for control purposes and the snot, if the right consistency, will by the power of mucus magic, start to wind around the tissue and gradually all of the snot in your nostril will be pulled out.

*tip* move the tissue from left to right to keep the snot on fresh tissue, you don't want it going over itself, as this makes the snot lose traction and your snot rollng session will end too early.

if you have a lot of snot, possibly due to having a massive konk a tissue change may be required. with practice you'llbe able to leave a small bit of snot hanging out to attach to the next tissue.

it feels really nice. it is possible for you to do both nostrils at the same time, but this method does mean you'll get some snot on at least both of your index fingers and thumbs.

Personally I prefere te single nostril method, which is very safe as far as snot contamination goes.
(Nobody Likes Mortal Wombat, Mon 18 Feb 2008, 23:57, 3 replies, latest was 17 years ago)

you are a mental person.
this is not an insult.
( postbear has metal knees, Sun 24 Feb 2008, 10:00, Reply)

This
is genius!
( Mike Fishcake teamfishcake.co.uk - better than your mum's face, Sun 2 Mar 2008, 21:41, Reply)

works
This works too, especially if you have hay fever
( sandettie light vessel automatic New Twitter - @bollocksreally, Sun 9 Mar 2008, 14:25, Reply)