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This is a question Top Tips

Got a great tip? Share it with us. You know, stuff like "Prevent sneezing by pressing you index finger firmly between your nose and your upper lip."

(, Wed 29 Nov 2006, 16:33)
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Humanity! Breed more, until you cover the surface of the planet like so many cancerous rats.
For extra lols, steadily destroy the environment on which you are totally dependent, to the point that you actually award each other for having clean beaches because they're such a rarity. Start wars with each other over a made-up fairy tale, and moan about people from other parts of the planet aren't like the people from the part of the planet you're from. Couple this with pretentious and arrogant self-aggrandisement, but refer to it as "philosophy". Delight in and celebrate your children, while simultaneously feeding them a steady diet of ultraviolent games and sexualised images, then scold them for misbehaving. As they start to behave in the exact same ways that you did at their age, and take interest in exactly the same things that you did, tell them how your generation did it better in every single way. Practice moaning constantly about every single aspect of their decision-making, and when they start to ignore you complain about disrespect. In your dotage try to make a final stab at patronising everyone you know, and then die, without any significant note or difference made to the universe at all.
(, Thu 4 Jul 2013, 11:34, 9 replies, latest was 11 years ago)
How did that job interview for The Samaritans go, just out of interest?

(, Thu 4 Jul 2013, 11:52, Reply)
Very well.
I managed to take four of them out with the first shot.
(, Thu 4 Jul 2013, 12:14, Reply)
In the future this is how wars will be fought.
Not with bullets, but with words.

Harsh, mean words, on the internet.
(, Thu 4 Jul 2013, 13:30, Reply)
I see you've skipped straight to the moaning and patronising stage.
How terribly efficient of you.
(, Thu 4 Jul 2013, 12:48, Reply)
Soon I will become
Computer.

Man and machine.
(, Thu 4 Jul 2013, 14:22, Reply)
If Superman 3 taught me anything,
it's that this won't end well.
(, Thu 4 Jul 2013, 15:28, Reply)
They should remake Superman 3.
Jude Law to lead.
(, Thu 4 Jul 2013, 15:43, Reply)

If Superman 3 taught me anything,
it's that this won't end well.

POWER EXTREME
(, Thu 4 Jul 2013, 19:25, Reply)
Arf!
I love that you got from this to Stone Roses lyrics in two moves.
(, Fri 5 Jul 2013, 18:34, Reply)

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