Stop Wayne Rooney from trying to sleep with your girlfriend
by putting your granny out as a decoy.
( Rotating Wobbly Hat That's not a banana. THIS is a banana., Thu 16 Jan 2014, 19:02, 6 replies, latest was 11 years ago)

It's easier to arrange for
Wayne Rooney to look like Shreks disabled little brother.

Worked for me, my girlfriend has never fucked him.
(username failed moderation, Fri 17 Jan 2014, 11:58, Reply)

That's what she wants you to think.

( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Fri 17 Jan 2014, 13:23, Reply)

No, she wants me to think
I should clean up the kitchen, and watch Downton Abbey.
(username failed moderation, Mon 20 Jan 2014, 12:34, Reply)

*whip crack*

( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Mon 20 Jan 2014, 17:17, Reply)

I can't stand the strain of this. I'm living a lie.
I don't have a girlfriend. I made it up so I could post an answer.

I have a wife. In all honesty, I can't say whether Wayne Rooney has fucked her or not, but I think it's unlikely.
(username failed moderation, Mon 20 Jan 2014, 17:55, Reply)

topical

( mictoboy shitting in your cunt since, Fri 17 Jan 2014, 16:24, Reply)