Report. But I like this story.
At one of the larger UK festival a call comes over the radio from a fairly bemused response team.

The victim had a lobe extension, what this effectively is, is a ear piercing that has been stretched and a hoop inserted to give a clear opening. Sometimes these are a few millimetres at most, sometimes they're wide enough to fit a can of redbull through.

Someone completely unknown to the victim approached him and after a brief conversation, then said the following "You know what would make a cool picture? If I was to padlock you to that fencing through your ear!"

The victim agreed that it indeed would make a cool picture. The protagonist produced a padlock from his pocket, they approached the nearest fencing and he was duly locked to it through a lovingly stretched hole in his flesh.

The protagonist unfortunately didn't stick around to take a picture. He didn't even release the poor sod. Instead, he just fucked off and left him.
( Muns, Mon 3 Mar 2014, 16:38, 23 replies)

This should really be reposted every week.
They should disallow question suggestions that don't fit this answer.
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Mon 3 Mar 2014, 16:40, closed)

Disallow?
You been talking to George Doubleya?
( edjogs Collared doves are shit., Mon 3 Mar 2014, 17:45, closed)

Whuh?
Disallow is a perfectly ordinary English word.
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Mon 3 Mar 2014, 18:11, closed)

The word you're looking for is "cromulent."

( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Mon 3 Mar 2014, 18:25, closed)

So is excrement but they're both shit.

( edjogs Collared doves are shit., Tue 4 Mar 2014, 14:00, closed)

i saw a fight in a night club once where a guy had his ear lobe extension ripped

( The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Mon 3 Mar 2014, 16:45, closed)

i saw a fight in a pub, and one guy who had multiple piercings in his ear
had the outer part ripped off like the perforations on a stamp.

He bled rather a lot
( mictoboy shitting in your cunt since, Mon 3 Mar 2014, 16:46, closed)

Yer.
I had an eyebrow ring for ten minutes, until I realised that wandering around the sorts of areas I do dressed like I do with a face like mine, it wouldn't just be a black eye I'd suffer if someone decided to kick off.
( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Mon 3 Mar 2014, 16:50, closed)

I, too, had an eyebrow piercing.
I had mine for about 8 hours until I removed it for similar reasons to yourself. That and for some reason some people seem to think that having a piercing (other than women who have their ears pierced) makes one somehow unable to perform jobs of work.
(Me, I'm not... in any way intoxicated, Tue 4 Mar 2014, 15:15, closed)

At a goth club in Birmingham I saw a fight kick off
where one guy ripped out another's nipple piercing. There was lots of blood.
( emvee cruor deo cruoris, Mon 3 Mar 2014, 17:50, closed)

I find the idea of a club full of brummie Goths to be both hilarious and the most depressing thing ever.

( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Mon 3 Mar 2014, 18:26, closed)

I picked someone up by the cock once.
Apparently his Prince Albert got caught in another piercing down towards his scrote and pulled it out. I did wonder why it was convieniently handle-like.
( gone, Tue 4 Mar 2014, 8:44, closed)

Was he short and stout?

( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Tue 4 Mar 2014, 9:44, closed)

Tall and ginger.

( gone, Thu 6 Mar 2014, 15:41, closed)

I'm pretty sure I enjoyed this, last time.
I'm certainly enjoining it, now.
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Mon 3 Mar 2014, 16:58, closed)

My cousin
apparently has multiple piercings in her lady parts. When this was revealed I asked her husband is he had any exotic piercings. He said he was tempted but the prospect of getting stuck together like one of those irritating metal puzzles you get in Christmas crackers put him off
(sittingduck Attention seeking, bullshitting fuck-knuckle, Mon 3 Mar 2014, 17:03, closed)

Now I can't get rid of the image of
the pair of them sat together patiently trying all the combinations.
( edjogs Collared doves are shit., Mon 3 Mar 2014, 17:48, closed)

And then giving up and asking uncle Roy to help cos he's good at those things.

( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Mon 3 Mar 2014, 18:13, closed)

hahaha

( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Mon 3 Mar 2014, 19:20, closed)

Got my nose ring caught on one once

(moon monkey is busy making memories worth repressing, Tue 4 Mar 2014, 11:26, closed)

I call bull, on this story.

( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Tue 4 Mar 2014, 11:53, closed)

I think he meant bedsp-ring

( edjogs Collared doves are shit., Tue 4 Mar 2014, 14:02, closed)

I am clicking this not only because I like this story but people with those earlobe extensions are pricks.

( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Tue 4 Mar 2014, 18:28, closed)