I used to be an atheist
Now I fervently believe in the divine overlord of blue lollipops and pink lemonade. I have to swallow bubblegum twice a week or he'll make me shit a live badger and turn my winky into marshmallow.

NOW WHY THE FUCK WON'T PEOPLE TAKE ME SERIOUSLY??
(Greencloud Wanted to go fishing on, Thu 19 May 2011, 23:22, 5 replies)

Because you don't believe
there's a big bearded man in space, with an army of winged people, telling him you're masturbating.
( Bourbon Fox Bourbon is a moron, Thu 19 May 2011, 23:39, closed)

What??
Seriously?

*puts penis away. Hides*
(Robin of the Hood isn't into the whole brevity thing, Fri 20 May 2011, 4:23, closed)

Busted
The reason I have my "winged army" looking for people masturbating is because I myself have gone blind from it centuries ago. Don't worry you won't go to hell for rubbing one out, but you may be going because of that amateur bestiality site you were enjoying.
(god himself could really use a day off, Fri 20 May 2011, 4:54, closed)

I think someone might object to your user name.....
www.b3ta.com/users/profile.php?id=3

:D
( camp freddy well, would you look at that!, Fri 20 May 2011, 9:06, closed)

Well he's not very active is he
or at least hasn't been for the lasts 2000 years or so
(Smale is stuffed, Fri 20 May 2011, 10:07, closed)