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This is a question Twattery

Nigella Pussycat says: Tell us about utter twats doing remarkably twatty things. Or have you ever done something really twattish to a friend, loved one or pet? In summary: Twats

(, Thu 12 Apr 2012, 13:30)
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Inconsiderate customer holds up shop with repeated impulse buying.
Last Christmas I went to buy someone a present from a small coffee shop in Leeds. By "small" I mean it had about 20 square feet of floor space. When I went to pay there was a customer before me, with one or two items - or so I thought.

CUSTOMER: Can I have have 250g of [coffee type A]?
Assistant weighs out and seals up a bag full (this takes about a minute).
ASSISTANT: Is that everything?
CUSTOMER: Actually, I'll have 125g of [coffee type B] as well.
Assistant weighs out and seals up a bag full.
ASSISTANT: Is that everything?
CUSTOMER: No, I'll have 125g of [coffee type C].
Assistant weighs out and seals up a bag full. A queue is building up.
ASSISTANT: Is that everything?
CUSTOMER: Thinking about it, I'd quite like 125g of [coffee type D] too.
Assistant weighs out and seals up a bag full.
ASSISTANT: Is that everything?
Assistant weighs out and seals up a bag full. The queue has now reached the door.
CUSTOMER: Erm... 125g of [coffee type E].
Assistant weighs out and seals up a bag full. By this point, the queue is covering most of the shop floor.
ASSISTANT: Is that everything?
CUSTOMER: Oh, you've got [coffee type F]! I'll have 125g of [coffee type F].
Assistant weighs out and seals up a bag full. The rest of the queue silently commits murder inside their heads.
ASSISTANT: (still polite, but her mask of pleasantry is wearing thin) Is that everything?
CUSTOMER: Yes it is.

Having finally paid after ten minutes impulse buying half the stock behind the counter, she and her friend left the shop blithely chatting away, the two of them totally oblivious to the grim-faced and forbidding angular mass of quietly seething Leodisians in their wake.

I almost laughed at the sheer absurdity of it. It seemed like the kind of thing that only happens in sitcoms. And I still can't quite believe there are folk around who have genuinely survived well into adulthood with such scant knowledge of basic everyday courtesy and consideration.
(, Fri 13 Apr 2012, 19:57, 14 replies)
Buying coffee in a shop that sells coffee?
What an absolute twat.
(, Fri 13 Apr 2012, 20:19, closed)
haha, yeah
Considerately re-hosted on b3ta so as not to leech some other bugger's bandwidth.

yeah
(, Fri 13 Apr 2012, 20:20, closed)
So what were they supposed to do?
Buy one bag, go to the back of the queue and wait to buy another?
(, Fri 13 Apr 2012, 21:20, closed)
If I wanted five or six bags I'd have asked for them all at once.
It would have made the assistant and the other customers aware that it was a lengthy order and would take a little while, rather than just tacking bit after bit onto the end of an apparently short and simple transaction.

Plus I got the impression that particular customer only intended to buy one or two things at first but ended up getting a lot more than that on a whim. Hence the two references to "impulse buying" in the original post.
(, Fri 13 Apr 2012, 23:57, closed)
^ this
In my experience, it can be quicker for staff to fill orders if we get it all at once. While we're happy to run back and forth as much as necessary, it can needlessly delay you and the people behind you.

Our heads won't explode if you tell us more than one thing at once, y'know. We can send someone out back to get a case of Grommits off the delivery; while we weigh out your Flungers, Cabdabblers, and Smendlers in prompt sucession.

Do not take us for some conjuror of cheap tricks; we are not trying to rob you, we're trying to help you.
(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 7:08, closed)
You have Cabdabblers???

(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 16:13, closed)
Oh yes
Both kinds, usually.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 22:56, closed)
So, if she was impulse buying, she could hardly order it all at once, could she?
What did you want her to do? Order her coffee, then think, Oh, I want some of that other coffee, too, but I won't buy it now while it's my turn. I'll join the back of the queue instead.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 19:22, closed)
Well, if it was impulsive; then fair enough for sequential ordering.
However, that doesn't excuse the lack of courtesy; a little apology goes a long way if you're slowing things down.
(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 22:59, closed)
Thank you.
I considering posting something similar, but my brain was being shorted out by the hand-shaped imprints on my forehead.
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 23:39, closed)
"Leodisians" is now my word of the day.
Thank you.
(, Sat 14 Apr 2012, 16:02, closed)
People from Leeds are called Loiners.

(, Sun 15 Apr 2012, 19:23, closed)
Leodisians?
I read it as "quietly seething Lesbians"
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 11:26, closed)
Cheese Shop
This is actually just like the cheese shop sketch from Monty Python...just like,the other way around...or something.
(, Mon 16 Apr 2012, 11:28, closed)

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