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This is a question Winning

I once won a gas boiler from The Guardian. Tell us about times you've won, and the excellent and/or crappy prizes you've lifted.

Suggested by dazbrilliantwhites

(, Thu 28 Apr 2011, 14:08)
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What a lovely lamp!
In my first year as a teacher I begrudgingly went in to school on a Saturday to participate in the school fete. Poverty-stricken as I was, I was made to feel obliged to join in by purchasing a fistful of raffle tickets. Inevitably I won a prize. It was a mind-numbingly hideous table lamp, obviously hand made by a tasteless moron who had simply pushed a few plastic flowers into an empty wine bottle and stuck a light fitting and grotesque plastic lampshade on the top.

I turned to one of the oldest teachers, Mr Kramer, and said "Trust me to win the ugliest and most useless prize of the lot!"

"Mmm" he said, "My wife made it shortly before she died of cancer."
(, Mon 2 May 2011, 19:17, 8 replies)
Cancer is sometimes the good guy.

(, Mon 2 May 2011, 19:26, closed)
Woooo hoooo
Limited edition!
(, Mon 2 May 2011, 20:02, closed)
The curse of the cancerous lamp

(, Mon 2 May 2011, 21:33, closed)
"Are you sure it wasn't
shame that killed her?"
(, Mon 2 May 2011, 21:42, closed)
Which automatically makes it some kind of work of art.

(, Mon 2 May 2011, 22:25, closed)
He couldn't have been very sentimental.
After all, he put the lamp in a raffle.
(, Mon 2 May 2011, 22:39, closed)
To which you retorted
a massive brain tumour?
(, Tue 3 May 2011, 13:18, closed)
That was funny until I saw it written down.
humour is harder than it looks. I guess Arnold Schwarzenegger deserved all that money for Kindergarten Cop... that was a comedy, wasn't it?
(, Tue 3 May 2011, 13:19, closed)

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