When people decided that
any girl over a size 8 was fat
any woman whose tits aren't where they were when she was 14 is saggy
any girl without the arse of a teenage boy is fat.

Tell a woman that for long enough, and you'll get her to the point where she believes you. That's why girls in my class at school would cry themselves to sleep at night because they thought their perfectly natural bodies weren't up to scratch.


I never understood the 'hairless pussy, arse of a 14 year old boy' fetish, but then I guess I'm not a paedophile hiding in the closet (needlessly inflammatory remark).

As for me, I'm a size 12 and I don't plan on getting any thinner. My breasts aren't tiny little buds on my shoulders, facing skywards. I don't care. The men who like ththe kind of physique I'll never have would be best kept away from me.
( Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Thu 21 May 2009, 16:13, archived)

*makes a banner about this*
*wears it on arse*

Hello Captain. Where have you been?
( spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Thu 21 May 2009, 16:14, archived)

Ill. You?

( Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Thu 21 May 2009, 16:15, archived)

aw petal!
feeling better now? Was it the AIDS? I'm good thanks.
( spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Thu 21 May 2009, 16:17, archived)

Not particularly, to be honest.
But hey, never mind.
( Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Thu 21 May 2009, 16:18, archived)

rubbish!
I hope you'll still drag your leperous self to the bash next week? :)
( spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Thu 21 May 2009, 16:21, archived)

Aye, I want to see how many people glare silently from a corner at me this time.

( Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Thu 21 May 2009, 16:23, archived)

huzzah!

( spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Thu 21 May 2009, 16:33, archived)

So you're fat and have a massive bush ?
HOT DAWG !
( Goatworrier had your mum and she was shit, Thu 21 May 2009, 16:15, archived)

no, I'm curvaceous and fucked almost nightly.
Somehow I think I'll survive.
( Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Thu 21 May 2009, 16:16, archived)

I'm fucked at least five times a week
I've been overdoing my exercise routine.
( Goatworrier had your mum and she was shit, Thu 21 May 2009, 16:18, archived)

Shaven haven is win
As we've mentioned on here before, if you can easily confuse that with underage girls that speaks volumes of you
( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Thu 21 May 2009, 16:15, archived)

I don't know, I don't really go for the shaven look, I don't prefer it.
Tidy, yes. Shaven looks a bit off. Even without the ten year old connection, it still just looks a bit weird to me.
( Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Thu 21 May 2009, 16:16, archived)

Either or for me

( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Thu 21 May 2009, 16:17, archived)

either ANYTHING
( Goatworrier had your mum and she was shit, Thu 21 May 2009, 16:19, archived)

In the shape of a stegosaurus FTW

( Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Thu 21 May 2009, 16:19, archived)

Face on or side view?

( Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Thu 21 May 2009, 16:21, archived)

Side on
Obvs
( Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Thu 21 May 2009, 16:40, archived)

t-rex with open mouth so it looks like it's biting your cock
FTMFW
( Goatworrier had your mum and she was shit, Thu 21 May 2009, 16:21, archived)

there are degress of shaven too
I think fans of shaven aren't massively bothered about whether the area between the navel and labia is shaved or not (as long as it's neat/not overgrown).

/explict
( custard, Sat 23 May 2009, 14:07, archived)

Thing is though, no hetrosexual man has ever said this is what women should look like.
It's all actually down to what girls think they should look like due to the media portrayal in female magazines and peer pressure.

Question for lads:

What is the most ANNOYING thing your GF can say to you?

"I look FAT! I'm not going out...*flops about trying on clothes for another 2 hours*"

You know I'm not sexist but this sorta thing really does grate on me...
( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Thu 21 May 2009, 16:21, archived)

Sorry, but have you looked at Nuts magazine and the like?
Massive fake tits, tiny waist, vacant expression and a Maddy McCann haircut. Seems to be the same on each page.

Maybe I'm wrong, I don't know. Luckily I've never been male so I've never had to walk a mile and that. Oh well.
( Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Thu 21 May 2009, 16:25, archived)

Your making the mistake of thinking we've only got a one track mind for girls.

All of those bimbos, look alright in a magazine because it's a cartoon aspect and taken as such, with banter and what the not, but when out, no man would want to sleep or pull one.

It's like a freakshow, you have to look.
( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Thu 21 May 2009, 16:29, archived)

I think
it's a similar thought process to your average blokes attitude to buying clothes which is :

"I am insecure and have little concept of personal style, therefore I will look for so called designer branded clothing and wear this as I can hide behind the label"

Blokes look at these lads mags and say "I am too insecure to admit I find a big fat arse sexy on a woman, therefore I will demand that all women I treat to unsatisfying but mercifully breif sex have the physique of a 12 year old boy"
( Goatworrier had your mum and she was shit, Thu 21 May 2009, 16:33, archived)

^ bingo

( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Thu 21 May 2009, 16:36, archived)

That's so sad.
You'd save a lot of girls a lifetime of heartache if you were honest.
( Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Thu 21 May 2009, 16:46, archived)

Beat her up a bit
then say "There, now you're too fucking battered to go out. Stay in and cook me some food, I'm going out to have sex with a prostitute and punch a kitten"
( Goatworrier had your mum and she was shit, Thu 21 May 2009, 16:26, archived)