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Britain's Got Talent
allegedly.
Have YOU?
(I helped save b3ta! wotofco pissing in your swimming pool, Sun 24 May 2009, 21:16, archived)
Nope
Not at all.
(I helped save b3ta! Pickle Fairy is clumsily dancing away this fear, Sun 24 May 2009, 21:17, archived)
I can tie my own shoe laces

(I helped save b3ta! MrA, Sun 24 May 2009, 21:18, archived)
not really.

(I helped save b3ta! GrandmaOfShoes, Sun 24 May 2009, 21:20, archived)
I just keep myself fit and mention it as much as I can
I KEEP MYSELF FIT
(I helped save b3ta! GrandmaOfShoes, Sun 24 May 2009, 21:25, archived)
Yes. I can swallow hot dog sausages whole
and tie knots in cherry stalks with my tongue.
(I helped save b3ta! Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Sun 24 May 2009, 21:20, archived)
The cherry stalk thing is cool
I wish I could do it. I hope you're joking about the hot dogs though, because otherwise you would be the ultimate internet fatty, and I don't even know if you're fat or not.
(I helped save b3ta! Pickle Fairy is clumsily dancing away this fear, Sun 24 May 2009, 21:27, archived)
I beat a gay man at a hotdog swallowing contest once.
I am an internet fatty but not due to swallowing hotdogs.
(I helped save b3ta! Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Sun 24 May 2009, 21:31, archived)
Sometimes I can go all day without pissing myself

(I helped save b3ta! Madam Marlboro wonders if you've found her yet, Sun 24 May 2009, 21:21, archived)
Beaten my record by more than 23 hours :(

(I helped save b3ta! nick the greek, Sun 24 May 2009, 21:21, archived)
*victory dance*

(I helped save b3ta! Madam Marlboro wonders if you've found her yet, Sun 24 May 2009, 21:21, archived)
You've got britain
we've got talent
britain's got talent
it's the DJ talent
(I helped save b3ta! CowJam, Sun 24 May 2009, 21:21, archived)
pfft

(I helped save b3ta! Madam Marlboro wonders if you've found her yet, Sun 24 May 2009, 21:21, archived)
I used to think I had.

(I helped save b3ta! nick the greek, Sun 24 May 2009, 21:21, archived)
I'm good at some stuff, not so much at others.

(I helped save b3ta! BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Sun 24 May 2009, 21:23, archived)
I can fit my fist in my mouth.
There really is no practical use for this.
(I helped save b3ta! The Gentleman Bastard waxing lyrical. ©, Sun 24 May 2009, 21:25, archived)
what happens if it's raining fist acid, which is acid which melts only fists, and you have lost your other fist testing the drizzle and now you need to shelter your remaining fists or your days in the hardcore porn industry are over.
but then it's ok because you spawn a whole new series of porn films called Stumpy.
(I helped save b3ta! GrandmaOfShoes, Sun 24 May 2009, 21:27, archived)
What if your fist had done something unspeakable
and needed somewhere to hide?
(I helped save b3ta! wotofco pissing in your swimming pool, Sun 24 May 2009, 21:27, archived)
straight in
or do you have to unscrunch your hand a bit?

The first joint on my longest finger is too long to fit into my mouth vertically.
(I helped save b3ta! CowJam, Sun 24 May 2009, 21:28, archived)
Do you need to adopt the silent duck first?

(I helped save b3ta! nick the greek, Sun 24 May 2009, 21:31, archived)