you'd need to learn how to spell yacht first.

( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 2 Jun 2009, 15:10, archived)

It's a schooner

( Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Tue 2 Jun 2009, 15:11, archived)

I've invoked the 'how-your-dad-pronounces-it-when-he-thinks-he's-being-funny' spelling.
See also: destructions - instructions
sticky foot - certificate
disgusting - degustation (or however the french write 'tasting' on their wine shop windows)
(rnuk http://flickr.com/rnuk, Tue 2 Jun 2009, 15:12, archived)

my mum uses "destructions"
it was only a few years ago I learnt this wasn't a real word.
( spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Tue 2 Jun 2009, 15:13, archived)

it is a word
www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/destructions

it just doesn't mean instructions
( GrandmaOfShoes, Tue 2 Jun 2009, 15:18, archived)

for that usage, I mean
I remember a few people looking at me rather oddly.
( spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Tue 2 Jun 2009, 15:20, archived)

I can't say skeleton
I say Skellington :S

Also it's skissors and CH-emist.
( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Tue 2 Jun 2009, 15:25, archived)

I bet you say 'haich' too.

( ArthurTheRat, Tue 2 Jun 2009, 15:36, archived)

And a chimley, or chimminy?

( RR I love you ... in a way, Tue 2 Jun 2009, 15:38, archived)

chimly annoys me.
it's not even slightly a real word.
( spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Tue 2 Jun 2009, 15:40, archived)

I LIK EIT

( sleepybinky, Tue 2 Jun 2009, 15:55, archived)

I'LL LET YOU OFF
seeing as you're so fluffy.
( spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Tue 2 Jun 2009, 16:03, archived)

I'm hearing 'dophlin' mentioned

( Theoban What of it, Tue 2 Jun 2009, 15:41, archived)

oh, and 'arks'. as in arks you a question.

( RR I love you ... in a way, Tue 2 Jun 2009, 15:44, archived)

in America some people say "axe".

( spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Tue 2 Jun 2009, 15:46, archived)

Alright I ax u dis question aii? Brap brap brap, you feel me?

( Theoban What of it, Tue 2 Jun 2009, 15:46, archived)

THEO NO WHAT HAS HAPPENED TO YOU IN FRANCE

( spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Tue 2 Jun 2009, 15:48, archived)

dis jst how we tork on teh street, innit, yo.
u dnt hve 2 wig out like, sistah.
( Theoban What of it, Tue 2 Jun 2009, 15:50, archived)

Woo Woo
jus like an larm klok, r like cooking bwekfast in tha mownin
(King Baby Duck more than a ceiling, Tue 2 Jun 2009, 15:54, archived)

dats how we due it in tha hud, aii
cuckin fud 4 owah hoemeys innit blud
( Theoban What of it, Tue 2 Jun 2009, 15:56, archived)

CHIMBLEY

( sleepybinky, Tue 2 Jun 2009, 15:45, archived)

also CHOPNEY.

( sleepybinky, Tue 2 Jun 2009, 15:46, archived)