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Right. As I can't really leave the site, I'm having to soak up the sun in the car-park.
This is less than adequate, so I need to turn my little area into a tropical paradise/deck of an expensive yatch/poolside/other.
I've eaten my fruit salad, so I'm lacking in raw materials to make it happen; all I'm left with is my enthusiastic smile and hairy chest. What can be done?
(rnuk http://flickr.com/rnuk, Tue 2 Jun 2009, 15:08, archived)
Spit on a leaf, then put your feet on it.

(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Tue 2 Jun 2009, 15:09, archived)
I've updated my FAN CLUB PAGE.
This IS related!
(I helped save b3ta! Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Tue 2 Jun 2009, 15:09, archived)
Jammy, as a keen Sexboxer have you seen the e3 announcments?
some look great such as the Natal project for XBx.
kotaku.com/5274539/see-microsofts-project-natal-in-action

I would be abit afraid of having a wank and then turn my xbox on and connecting to a chat with just 3 knuckle shuffles.
(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Tue 2 Jun 2009, 15:18, archived)
Personally I can't wait for anal interfaces to become industry standard.

(I helped save b3ta! Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Tue 2 Jun 2009, 15:18, archived)
I can't believe that Peter Molyneux thing is real.

(I helped save b3ta! ArthurTheRat, Tue 2 Jun 2009, 15:19, archived)
it's fucking creepy if you ask me

(I helped save b3ta! Lightguy hail satan, Tue 2 Jun 2009, 15:20, archived)

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Uncanny_valley
(I helped save b3ta! ArthurTheRat, Tue 2 Jun 2009, 15:29, archived)
The real Uncanny Valley is just outside Newport
Don't ever go there
(I helped save b3ta! Theoban What of it, Tue 2 Jun 2009, 15:31, archived)
I haven't xboxed much as of late.
I did try that Fight Night Round 4 last night mind. Tremendous banter.
(I helped save b3ta! Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Tue 2 Jun 2009, 15:21, archived)
Oh, is the demo out yet? Great times.

(I helped save b3ta! ArthurTheRat, Tue 2 Jun 2009, 15:25, archived)
I'm considering the purchase of a 360

(I helped save b3ta! WHARRGARBL, Tue 2 Jun 2009, 15:24, archived)
I am, but when it gets cold and dark again
it's too nice out to become pasty again because of games
(I helped save b3ta! Malaka omdz, Tue 2 Jun 2009, 16:19, archived)
I have just got a 360.
I look forward to getting shot in the head by several of you very soon.
(I helped save b3ta! RR I love you ... in a way, Tue 2 Jun 2009, 15:25, archived)
ME!

(I helped save b3ta! Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Tue 2 Jun 2009, 15:25, archived)
" Hey guys, can't we all just get al...*Bang*...."
HEADSHOT
(I helped save b3ta! RR I love you ... in a way, Tue 2 Jun 2009, 15:33, archived)
Good good, COD 6 comes our soon, i'll probably waste another 6 months solid playing that like what I did with COD 4.
So many great games coming out this year for it.
(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Tue 2 Jun 2009, 15:26, archived)
Absolutely.
COD5 didn't interest me at all. WW2's been done enough times.
Modern Warfare is a far better setting.
(I helped save b3ta! ArthurTheRat, Tue 2 Jun 2009, 15:28, archived)
COD5 was also shite in comparison to 4.

(I helped save b3ta! BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Tue 2 Jun 2009, 16:02, archived)
COD4 was fantastic.
I managed it all on Veteran, but just can't do the plane bit at the end.
(I helped save b3ta! Druid, Tue 2 Jun 2009, 16:16, archived)
I've just started COD4.
It's making me realise my gaming skillzorz (especially FPS's) are very rusty.
(I helped save b3ta! RR I love you ... in a way, Tue 2 Jun 2009, 15:34, archived)
I might try and get on LIVE tonight for the first time.
if not, it'll be the weekend.
(I helped save b3ta! RR I love you ... in a way, Tue 2 Jun 2009, 15:36, archived)
I'm cooking tonight around a mates house but will be on at the weekend.
COD 4 is all about the online, It's so much fun although hard at the beginning. It gets really addictive.
(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Tue 2 Jun 2009, 15:38, archived)
In my (limited) experience of online gaming in the past, it's been shit. I've not enjoyed it.
The learning curve is too steep. You don't last 2 seconds before some l33t d00d is pwning you, like the n00b you are (am I sayin' it rite?lol).

That's not just COD, but any FPS.
(I helped save b3ta! RR I love you ... in a way, Tue 2 Jun 2009, 15:43, archived)
The only exceptions I've had to this rule are in Team Fortress 2, where thankfuilly enough people are shit that sometimes I can do alright
And Left 4 Dead, but that's mainly due to the co-op nature and playing with people I know.

I stuck a toe into Quake 3 online once. Never again.
(I helped save b3ta! Theoban What of it, Tue 2 Jun 2009, 15:45, archived)
Can anyone tell me what the matchmaking service is like on xbox LIVE?
Could I get a game with other people who are alright, but don't spend 18 hours a day on it?
(I helped save b3ta! RR I love you ... in a way, Tue 2 Jun 2009, 15:46, archived)
it was ok on Halo AFAIK
you had levels of ability based on badges (earned through online play), and you get grouped with people with similar levels.
(I helped save b3ta! spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Tue 2 Jun 2009, 15:47, archived)
depends on the game
a fair few of them have trueskill ratings, where it matches you up with people it estimates are around your skill level

of course other games just tend to dump you with whoever, but those ones tend not to get played online that much
(I helped save b3ta! Lightguy hail satan, Tue 2 Jun 2009, 15:52, archived)
roccccccccccccket

(I helped save b3ta! sleepybinky, Tue 2 Jun 2009, 15:45, archived)
*slobbewrysmooch*

(I helped save b3ta! RR I love you ... in a way, Tue 2 Jun 2009, 15:47, archived)
thank fuck for that.
i thought i was losing it.
(I helped save b3ta! sleepybinky, Tue 2 Jun 2009, 15:47, archived)
You? Pah, never.

(I helped save b3ta! RR I love you ... in a way, Tue 2 Jun 2009, 15:48, archived)
oh you.
*hangs onto beard*

*swings*
(I helped save b3ta! sleepybinky, Tue 2 Jun 2009, 15:54, archived)
*weaves a beardyhammock*
*brews up*
(I helped save b3ta! RR I love you ... in a way, Tue 2 Jun 2009, 16:01, archived)
awww yeah
hey, i go home at four today. THAT'S NOW.

bye xx
(I helped save b3ta! sleepybinky, Tue 2 Jun 2009, 16:03, archived)
PLEES BE MI FREND

(I helped save b3ta! Lightguy hail satan, Tue 2 Jun 2009, 15:50, archived)
you'd need to learn how to spell yacht first.

(I helped save b3ta! the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 2 Jun 2009, 15:10, archived)
It's a schooner

(I helped save b3ta! Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Tue 2 Jun 2009, 15:11, archived)
I've invoked the 'how-your-dad-pronounces-it-when-he-thinks-he's-being-funny' spelling.
See also: destructions - instructions
sticky foot - certificate
disgusting - degustation (or however the french write 'tasting' on their wine shop windows)
(rnuk http://flickr.com/rnuk, Tue 2 Jun 2009, 15:12, archived)
my mum uses "destructions"
it was only a few years ago I learnt this wasn't a real word.
(I helped save b3ta! spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Tue 2 Jun 2009, 15:13, archived)
it is a word
www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/destructions

it just doesn't mean instructions
(I helped save b3ta! GrandmaOfShoes, Tue 2 Jun 2009, 15:18, archived)
for that usage, I mean
I remember a few people looking at me rather oddly.
(I helped save b3ta! spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Tue 2 Jun 2009, 15:20, archived)
I can't say skeleton
I say Skellington :S

Also it's skissors and CH-emist.
(I helped save b3ta! Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Tue 2 Jun 2009, 15:25, archived)
I bet you say 'haich' too.

(I helped save b3ta! ArthurTheRat, Tue 2 Jun 2009, 15:36, archived)
And a chimley, or chimminy?

(I helped save b3ta! RR I love you ... in a way, Tue 2 Jun 2009, 15:38, archived)
chimly annoys me.
it's not even slightly a real word.
(I helped save b3ta! spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Tue 2 Jun 2009, 15:40, archived)
I LIK EIT

(I helped save b3ta! sleepybinky, Tue 2 Jun 2009, 15:55, archived)
I'LL LET YOU OFF
seeing as you're so fluffy.
(I helped save b3ta! spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Tue 2 Jun 2009, 16:03, archived)
I'm hearing 'dophlin' mentioned

(I helped save b3ta! Theoban What of it, Tue 2 Jun 2009, 15:41, archived)
oh, and 'arks'. as in arks you a question.

(I helped save b3ta! RR I love you ... in a way, Tue 2 Jun 2009, 15:44, archived)
in America some people say "axe".

(I helped save b3ta! spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Tue 2 Jun 2009, 15:46, archived)
Alright I ax u dis question aii? Brap brap brap, you feel me?

(I helped save b3ta! Theoban What of it, Tue 2 Jun 2009, 15:46, archived)
THEO NO WHAT HAS HAPPENED TO YOU IN FRANCE

(I helped save b3ta! spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Tue 2 Jun 2009, 15:48, archived)
dis jst how we tork on teh street, innit, yo.
u dnt hve 2 wig out like, sistah.
(I helped save b3ta! Theoban What of it, Tue 2 Jun 2009, 15:50, archived)
Woo Woo
jus like an larm klok, r like cooking bwekfast in tha mownin
(King Baby Duck more than a ceiling, Tue 2 Jun 2009, 15:54, archived)
dats how we due it in tha hud, aii
cuckin fud 4 owah hoemeys innit blud
(I helped save b3ta! Theoban What of it, Tue 2 Jun 2009, 15:56, archived)
CHIMBLEY

(I helped save b3ta! sleepybinky, Tue 2 Jun 2009, 15:45, archived)
also CHOPNEY.

(I helped save b3ta! sleepybinky, Tue 2 Jun 2009, 15:46, archived)
Put a pinch of sage in your boots and all day long a spicy scent is your reward

(I helped save b3ta! Theoban What of it, Tue 2 Jun 2009, 15:11, archived)
PAPERCLIP & COASTER MEDALLION

(I helped save b3ta! RR I love you ... in a way, Tue 2 Jun 2009, 15:11, archived)
How much are coconuts?
I could get a coconut from tesco's.
(rnuk http://flickr.com/rnuk, Tue 2 Jun 2009, 15:12, archived)
And a 1.5l bottle of Lilt.
Now you're living the playboy lifestyle.
(I helped save b3ta! RR I love you ... in a way, Tue 2 Jun 2009, 15:13, archived)
I and I been in Babylon too lang.

(rnuk http://flickr.com/rnuk, Tue 2 Jun 2009, 15:17, archived)
please, what is "live the site"?

(I helped save b3ta! sleepybinky, Tue 2 Jun 2009, 15:26, archived)
*slow clap*

(I helped save b3ta! Dave Trouser ; the people's choice - 75% agree, Tue 2 Jun 2009, 15:27, archived)
thats a rubbish answer.

(I helped save b3ta! sleepybinky, Tue 2 Jun 2009, 15:34, archived)
you nob.

(I helped save b3ta! sleepybinky, Tue 2 Jun 2009, 15:35, archived)
leave I think

(PsychoChomp, Tue 2 Jun 2009, 15:35, archived)
that was an explanation not a request

(PsychoChomp, Tue 2 Jun 2009, 15:36, archived)
Shut up fatty.
Pointing out obvious typos makes you the nob.
(I helped save b3ta! Dave Trouser ; the people's choice - 75% agree, Tue 2 Jun 2009, 15:39, archived)
Haha, I just got a spam email titled: 'Read or you're gay'.

(I helped save b3ta! Esme Weatherwax I swear on my tash it's daycent hash, Tue 2 Jun 2009, 15:41, archived)
The question is, did you read it?

(I helped save b3ta! Dave Trouser ; the people's choice - 75% agree, Tue 2 Jun 2009, 15:47, archived)
Did you read it?

(I helped save b3ta! RR I love you ... in a way, Tue 2 Jun 2009, 15:48, archived)
The world needs to know!

(Bazongaloid, Tue 2 Jun 2009, 15:53, archived)
I bet you read it.

(PsychoChomp, Tue 2 Jun 2009, 15:56, archived)