he didn't poo on me
and in his defence he cut his pants off (he didn't want to get shitty legs) befor finishing his pint
(chemicals1234, Wed 30 Sep 2009, 15:09, archived)

He deliberately shat himself
to get rid of you
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Wed 30 Sep 2009, 15:10, archived)

Then would it not have been a better idea shitting on me so i had to go home?

I need smarter friends.
(chemicals1234, Wed 30 Sep 2009, 15:12, archived)

He hadn't thought that far ahead
he thought pooing his pants would be enough
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Wed 30 Sep 2009, 15:20, archived)

Hahaha, you're such a liar.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Wed 30 Sep 2009, 15:11, archived)

yeah
you never cut your pants off did you!
(Nobody Likes Mortal Wombat, Wed 30 Sep 2009, 15:23, archived)

He cut his pants off
Instead of taking them off and putting them in a bin.
(__, Wed 30 Sep 2009, 15:12, archived)

yes
he told us he did not want to get shit all over his legs whilst removing them. So cutting them off (with his keys) seemed like the better option.
(chemicals1234, Wed 30 Sep 2009, 15:13, archived)

This story is bullshit.

(PsychoChomp, Wed 30 Sep 2009, 15:14, archived)

I wish it were
but it is infact 100% true.
(chemicals1234, Wed 30 Sep 2009, 15:14, archived)

bollocks
you can't cut off trousers with keys, and no normal person would continue drinking in public after shitting themselves.
(PsychoChomp, Wed 30 Sep 2009, 15:15, archived)

he did not cut his trousers off
he cut his pants off! I agree no normal person would carry on drinking tho...
(chemicals1234, Wed 30 Sep 2009, 15:16, archived)

No normal person would shit themselves...

( Pickle Fairy is clumsily dancing away this fear, Wed 30 Sep 2009, 15:18, archived)

it happens tho
its the carrying on drinking bit that worrys me.
(chemicals1234, Wed 30 Sep 2009, 15:20, archived)

My mate pissed himself, so he bit his cock off and spat it out in a bin

(__, Wed 30 Sep 2009, 15:19, archived)

My mate pissed himself, so he I bit his cock off and spat it out in a bin
(chemicals1234, Wed 30 Sep 2009, 15:22, archived)

You bit his cock off?
Do you even know my mate?
(__, Wed 30 Sep 2009, 15:23, archived)

I only know him
from the waist down.
(chemicals1234, Wed 30 Sep 2009, 15:24, archived)

I'm getting bored of you

(__, Wed 30 Sep 2009, 15:28, archived)

Is he actually a retard?
Even gonz with his bowel aids doesn't shit himself.
(PsychoChomp, Wed 30 Sep 2009, 15:12, archived)

so why didn't he waddle to the gents
pul his trousers down, wrap bogroll round is thighs, lower the offending skiddies, wipe himself clean, undress his lower half, clean up his arse area, throw the pants in the bin and then put his trews back on?

CUTTING OFF WITH KEYS? yeah yeah yeah right your mate shat himself but YOU'RE the wanker here.
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Wed 30 Sep 2009, 15:28, archived)