Four weeks in a sausage factory.
Damn straight.
(__, Wed 21 Apr 2010, 14:56, archived)

you were the sausage tester
hence the fat face
( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Wed 21 Apr 2010, 14:57, archived)

I didn't get to be a quality controller :(

(__, Wed 21 Apr 2010, 15:02, archived)

haha
nice
( spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Wed 21 Apr 2010, 14:57, archived)

I worked in a sandwich factory for two days.
It was horrific and put me off eating prepacked sandwiches.
( Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Wed 21 Apr 2010, 14:58, archived)

Highlights plz

(Iggy Pop's Teeth, Wed 21 Apr 2010, 14:59, archived)

Once, when eating a somerfield pre-packaged wrap i found globs of wallpaper paste sticking the thing together.
I'm not kidding. fucking wallpaper paste.
( Willwillwritehiswill An arse like a slapped face., Wed 21 Apr 2010, 15:05, archived)

wallpaper paste from a WILLY

( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Wed 21 Apr 2010, 15:07, archived)

I told you never to call me that.

( Willwillwritehiswill An arse like a slapped face., Wed 21 Apr 2010, 15:07, archived)

sorry willy :(

( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Wed 21 Apr 2010, 15:08, archived)

Well
* the chicken fillings go onto the bread near frozen
* I witnessed someone cutting the sandwiches into four, one of them falling on the floor and the cutter picking it back up and putting it back on the conveyer belt
* a woman I was working with had an extremely runny nose and was constantly leaning over the sandwiches to fill them
* various people not washing their hands after coming back from the toilet
* people with scabbed over cuts not a plaster or wearing gloves handling foodstuffs and filling sandwiches BY HAND from great big buckets of filling
( Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Wed 21 Apr 2010, 15:09, archived)

*gags*

( TFD is sporting this season's finest necropants, Wed 21 Apr 2010, 15:09, archived)

I ready want a tescue value bacon sandwich now

( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Wed 21 Apr 2010, 15:10, archived)

Is that what *gay b3tan*'s calling it now?

( Noit happy baby orangutan, Wed 21 Apr 2010, 15:00, archived)

there was a mincing room too

(__, Wed 21 Apr 2010, 15:02, archived)

I bet you spent all your time there.

( Noit happy baby orangutan, Wed 21 Apr 2010, 15:04, archived)

only one night
i usually did the low-quality packing. that's putting packaged meat into boxes, so hygiene isn't really an issue there.

i havent eaten a pork pie or cocktail sausages since then, mind.
(__, Wed 21 Apr 2010, 15:06, archived)

Did butchers get confused and think your massive face was an elephant steak and try and process it?

( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Wed 21 Apr 2010, 15:08, archived)

Yes, DG.
This genuinely happened once.
(__, Wed 21 Apr 2010, 15:08, archived)

:D COOL!
aw man, I wish I had a big face now, rather than a cher face :'(
( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Wed 21 Apr 2010, 15:12, archived)

Maybe you could... CHER! friz's face

(PsychoChomp, Wed 21 Apr 2010, 15:28, archived)

ho ho ho!

( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Wed 21 Apr 2010, 15:40, archived)

It was too big to go through the machines.

( TFD is sporting this season's finest necropants, Wed 21 Apr 2010, 15:09, archived)

they just patted him with a spade for a solid 7 hours to tenderise this massive piece of meaty mystery profit.

( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Wed 21 Apr 2010, 15:11, archived)

...And that is how the meaty lump that is Friz's face got eye holes.

( TFD is sporting this season's finest necropants, Wed 21 Apr 2010, 15:17, archived)

next week children we'll tell you how he got his letterbox like grin

( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Wed 21 Apr 2010, 15:19, archived)

for fuck's sake

(__, Wed 21 Apr 2010, 15:21, archived)

hello mr friz

(Mortal Wombat - he's just an excitable boy, Wed 21 Apr 2010, 15:30, archived)

hey mmmnngghhh

(__, Wed 21 Apr 2010, 15:30, archived)

NUM NUM NUM NUM NUM NUM NUM NUM NUM NUM NUM NUM NUM NUM NUM NUM NUM
( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Wed 21 Apr 2010, 15:32, archived)

hahahaha!

(__, Wed 21 Apr 2010, 15:33, archived)

Mine's better you shitwank.

( TFD is sporting this season's finest necropants, Wed 21 Apr 2010, 15:34, archived)

shhhh
*rotates you into a hedge*
( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Wed 21 Apr 2010, 15:38, archived)

Oh Friz
:(
( TFD is sporting this season's finest necropants, Wed 21 Apr 2010, 15:33, archived)

So now it's goodbye from the Dino and Donkey Show, stay tuned to CBBC for Art Attack with Baldmonkey.

( TFD is sporting this season's finest necropants, Wed 21 Apr 2010, 15:23, archived)

*lights dim, stacks papers, furious groping*

( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Wed 21 Apr 2010, 15:32, archived)

I've told you time and time again DG, NOT to touch our children guests!

( TFD is sporting this season's finest necropants, Wed 21 Apr 2010, 15:35, archived)

sorry FD :S

( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Wed 21 Apr 2010, 15:37, archived)