Mostly I will be sitting about in my smelly old dressing gown
Then cooking for chums. But mostly I will be ruing sleeping on my left arm, the joints of which appear to be consumed by fire at the moment.
(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Sat 11 Jun 2011, 8:59, archived)

Boil a kettle then put your arm in the steam, carefully though
That'll ease your joints, and then prepare a poultice of rotten meat and roadside herbs
( Theoban What of it, Sat 11 Jun 2011, 9:00, archived)

That's tea sorted too
Thanks Theoban.
Ththanks.
(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Sat 11 Jun 2011, 9:03, archived)

Welcome to middle age!
It's all downhill from here I'm afraid. (But it can be amusing)
( fagilliD Fuck I'm good!, Sat 11 Jun 2011, 9:02, archived)

I'm made entirely of broken rubbish this week
I'd get knocked back at the knacker's yard.
(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Sat 11 Jun 2011, 9:06, archived)

I was like that a few years ago
But after a refit and some sprucing up I'm twice as bad. Thank fuck for beer!
( fagilliD Fuck I'm good!, Sat 11 Jun 2011, 9:08, archived)