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Enough of that bullshit.
I make the best biscotti known to man so there. And there are b3tans here and abroad that will vouch for that.

Hello internet. I'm smashing today after my day off yesterday. Why are you smashing today?
(I helped save b3ta! Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Tue 14 Jun 2011, 11:43, archived)

replying to a film thread three hours late
(I helped save b3ta! vladimir, Tue 14 Jun 2011, 11:45, archived)
Right on brother

(I helped save b3ta! Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Tue 14 Jun 2011, 11:45, archived)
I'm like lightning

(I helped save b3ta! vladimir, Tue 14 Jun 2011, 11:46, archived)
you're like a coiled sponge.

(I helped save b3ta! janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Tue 14 Jun 2011, 12:30, archived)
can we work on making me sound less like a contraceptive device?

(I helped save b3ta! vladimir, Tue 14 Jun 2011, 12:32, archived)
oh, alright then.
you're like a rubber diaphragm covered in spermicidal jelly.
(I helped save b3ta! janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Tue 14 Jun 2011, 12:33, archived)
I don't think I like the direction this sub-thread is going in, no offence

(I helped save b3ta! vladimir, Tue 14 Jun 2011, 12:34, archived)
My sore throat has eased off a bit, making today seem much brighter already.

(I helped save b3ta! Maffers I flow kinda strange like Spina Bifida footprints, Tue 14 Jun 2011, 11:45, archived)
HOORAY FOR MAFFERS

(I helped save b3ta! Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Tue 14 Jun 2011, 11:46, archived)
I've also just cooked some sausages.

(I helped save b3ta! Maffers I flow kinda strange like Spina Bifida footprints, Tue 14 Jun 2011, 11:47, archived)
can you be more specific?

(I helped save b3ta! vladimir, Tue 14 Jun 2011, 12:00, archived)
2 chilli sausages from Tesco.

(I helped save b3ta! Maffers I flow kinda strange like Spina Bifida footprints, Tue 14 Jun 2011, 12:23, archived)
Sausages with two chillis in them?

(I helped save b3ta! Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Tue 14 Jun 2011, 12:27, archived)
the toilet bowl with projectile vomit
thanks mental pills
(I helped save b3ta! moohalaa, Tue 14 Jun 2011, 11:46, archived)
Jesus.
Which ones?
(I helped save b3ta! Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Tue 14 Jun 2011, 11:47, archived)
citalopram 40mg
doubled from 20, I was going off the rails on a dose that normally works for me. Doctor upped them.

Watching Police Interceptors wrapped in a towel looking like an eskimo.
(I helped save b3ta! moohalaa, Tue 14 Jun 2011, 11:53, archived)
when I can't take it any more I take some cetrizine, and maybe snort some fluticasone

(I helped save b3ta! glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Tue 14 Jun 2011, 12:03, archived)
then you'll breathe easy and don't have itchy eyes?

(I helped save b3ta! moohalaa, Tue 14 Jun 2011, 12:06, archived)
:(
*hugs*
(I helped save b3ta! spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Tue 14 Jun 2011, 12:04, archived)
blergh

(I helped save b3ta! moohalaa, Tue 14 Jun 2011, 12:07, archived)

never mind, at least you know that although everything may seem to be utterly shit, awful, pointless and empty, it's an illusion dissolved by pills, because really, as everybody knows, everything is just fucking GREAT
(I helped save b3ta! vladimir, Tue 14 Jun 2011, 12:21, archived)
the ones shaped like
this
(I helped save b3ta! glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Tue 14 Jun 2011, 11:53, archived)
Cool, what other cakes can you make?
I'm smashing because I'm not completely monged out of my head like I was yesterday. Yay for sleep.
(I helped save b3ta! Frisbee TeaBoy, Tue 14 Jun 2011, 11:50, archived)
Lemon drizzle, key lime pie,
victoria sponge, coffee and walnut, loads.
(I helped save b3ta! Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Tue 14 Jun 2011, 11:52, archived)
SEND KEY LIME PIE.
it's necessary for my recovery, and you don't want THAT on your conscience.
(I helped save b3ta! janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Tue 14 Jun 2011, 12:31, archived)
I can't sent it.
It'd go all mouldy in the post :(
(I helped save b3ta! Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Tue 14 Jun 2011, 12:39, archived)
COME TO DAMN SUFFOLK THEN.
it's your turn. i drove past coventry in april.
(I helped save b3ta! janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Tue 14 Jun 2011, 12:50, archived)
I'm not, I feel like norman wisdom
There's something wrong with my new trousers, when I sit down, they go several inches up my shin, and I'm wearing ankle socks so my manly calves are feeling the breeze
(I helped save b3ta! VampireMonkeyOnSpeed a super sexy sexual sex terrorist sex, Tue 14 Jun 2011, 11:50, archived)
MR GRIMSDALE!

(I helped save b3ta! Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Tue 14 Jun 2011, 11:52, archived)
do you have little sock suspenders?

(I helped save b3ta! glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Tue 14 Jun 2011, 11:55, archived)
oreos or party rings
you have to have one
(I helped save b3ta! glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Tue 14 Jun 2011, 11:54, archived)
Oreos.
I think my stance on Party Rings is well documented.
(I helped save b3ta! Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Tue 14 Jun 2011, 11:55, archived)
please stop making your stance on all the biscuits, they are all broken :(

(I helped save b3ta! glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Tue 14 Jun 2011, 12:04, archived)
Because I have a hammer, and that look in my eye.

(I helped save b3ta! Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Tue 14 Jun 2011, 11:54, archived)
Alright Peter?

(I helped save b3ta! Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Tue 14 Jun 2011, 11:56, archived)
They're all whores.

(I helped save b3ta! Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Tue 14 Jun 2011, 12:04, archived)
FAJITAS!

(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Tue 14 Jun 2011, 11:55, archived)
I've got Tequila by The Champs in my head now.
Thanks fuckface.
(I helped save b3ta! Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Tue 14 Jun 2011, 11:56, archived)
I don't even know what that means
Cunt eyes
(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Tue 14 Jun 2011, 11:59, archived)
Google it, you shit

(I helped save b3ta! Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Tue 14 Jun 2011, 12:00, archived)
Can't be arsed
I've got a ginger dwarf coming for tea. It isn't you. HA!
(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Tue 14 Jun 2011, 12:03, archived)
:(
We'll deffo come to yours for tea one day. Make us something brilliant.
(I helped save b3ta! Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Tue 14 Jun 2011, 12:16, archived)
You keep saying that
And here I sit, my imploring eyes, damp through broken dreams, flickering like dying candles behind the net curtains of disappointment. Waiting, wishing that the next taxi that turns off Brook Street would have you in it. But you're NEVER THERE!
(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Tue 14 Jun 2011, 12:22, archived)
Dry your eyes mate

(I helped save b3ta! Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Tue 14 Jun 2011, 12:25, archived)
It's too late

(bogus official shove it up your cunt, Tue 14 Jun 2011, 12:25, archived)
I now have "Tequila" by Terrorvision as an earworm.
Thank you very much.
(I helped save b3ta! Lord Gnome, Tue 14 Jun 2011, 12:41, archived)
does it make you happy?

(I helped save b3ta! janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Tue 14 Jun 2011, 12:47, archived)
I just am
I have been going about my technician duties listening to some classic metal \m/
(I helped save b3ta! h3donist tryin' to play me out as if my name is Sega.., Tue 14 Jun 2011, 11:59, archived)
WINNING

(I helped save b3ta! Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Tue 14 Jun 2011, 12:01, archived)
if it's not Saxon, it's not metal.
(disclaimer - i hate Saxon)
(I helped save b3ta! janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Tue 14 Jun 2011, 12:32, archived)
i bet they're just alright
and even most the people who say they are the best are just saying it out of politeness, and the rest say it because they don't know any better.
(I helped save b3ta! Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Tue 14 Jun 2011, 12:09, archived)
I'm just saying it because
they're pretty good. Better than shop bought ones. I made hazelnut and cadbury chocolate button ones on Friday. They were pretty great.
(I helped save b3ta! Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Tue 14 Jun 2011, 12:14, archived)
it would be fairly pointless making them if they weren't better than shop bought ones i guess,
unless your shop is some kind of fancy patisserie in belgium or something.
(I helped save b3ta! Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Tue 14 Jun 2011, 12:15, archived)
Belgians only make waffles SSG
everyone knows this.
(I helped save b3ta! Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Tue 14 Jun 2011, 12:19, archived)
as a belgian i wasn't aware of this

(I helped save b3ta! Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Tue 14 Jun 2011, 12:21, archived)
I'm wearing shorts.
SHORTS!
(I helped save b3ta! spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Tue 14 Jun 2011, 12:12, archived)
also I've got a tea AND a coffee on the go

(I helped save b3ta! spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Tue 14 Jun 2011, 12:14, archived)
HOW MAN PET

(I helped save b3ta! Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Tue 14 Jun 2011, 12:15, archived)
ARE WE GANNIN OOT

(I helped save b3ta! spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Tue 14 Jun 2011, 12:20, archived)
WHY AYE
AHM GONNA TASH ON W'I GAZ
(I helped save b3ta! Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Tue 14 Jun 2011, 12:24, archived)
Do they look like normal trousers on you?

(I helped save b3ta! Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Tue 14 Jun 2011, 12:14, archived)
oh man, how short do trousers have to be to be short on you?
i'm calling it. age 18m - 2yrs.
(I helped save b3ta! janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Tue 14 Jun 2011, 12:34, archived)
INTERNET BULLYING

(I helped save b3ta! spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Tue 14 Jun 2011, 12:55, archived)
YOU FUCKING LOVE IT.

(I helped save b3ta! janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Tue 14 Jun 2011, 12:56, archived)