Good evening, I was just diagnosed with HIV.
I am thinking about myself now (of course, family and that) but WHAT really matters to you? What could happen tomorrow that will make it all worthwhile?

Maybe I know more than you know, give this a twirl, what is the worst that could happen? What do you WANT? Why aren't you going for it? What is stopping you?

I am around for a bit, but busy with retrovirals, just let me know.
(grumble finegold, Fri 22 Jul 2011, 0:16, archived)

i want to not get HIV
so stay away from me please
(Mortal Wombat - he's just an excitable boy, Fri 22 Jul 2011, 0:17, archived)

everyone else wants you to get hiv

( Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Fri 22 Jul 2011, 0:21, archived)

or maybe just you want that you internet mentaloid

(Mortal Wombat - he's just an excitable boy, Fri 22 Jul 2011, 0:22, archived)

I don't. He could survive years with that.
What about pancreatic cancer?
( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Fri 22 Jul 2011, 0:23, archived)

how do i get that

(Mortal Wombat - he's just an excitable boy, Fri 22 Jul 2011, 0:24, archived)

This looks legit.

( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Fri 22 Jul 2011, 0:19, archived)

so it's got HIV. it's not like it's gunna die.
oh.
(Mortal Wombat - he's just an excitable boy, Fri 22 Jul 2011, 0:20, archived)

if you really do have HIV don't worry
modern drugs are apparently really good. no worries innit.
(Mortal Wombat - he's just an excitable boy, Fri 22 Jul 2011, 0:27, archived)

If you have HIV,
shouldn't you be getting raped by dolphins or going to disney world or some shit?
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 22 Jul 2011, 0:20, archived)

i would fucking love to get done by a dolphin
or anything
(Mortal Wombat - he's just an excitable boy, Fri 22 Jul 2011, 0:21, archived)

I genuinely believe that one of the first things someone who has just been diagnosed with HIV would do is come and tell us, after having posted here about twenty times in the past 5 years.

( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Fri 22 Jul 2011, 0:30, archived)

Is this the question?
I have HIV and "shouldn't I be being raped by dolphins?"
(grumble finegold, Fri 22 Jul 2011, 0:34, archived)

or maybe that's how you got it
you filthy tart
(Mortal Wombat - he's just an excitable boy, Fri 22 Jul 2011, 0:40, archived)

I had sex with a transexual prostitute from Sao Paulo.
The condom broke. The second time we had sex without protection because, in her logic, "the damage had been done."
(grumble finegold, Fri 22 Jul 2011, 0:43, archived)

If this is true, then you are a fucking idiot.

( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Fri 22 Jul 2011, 0:44, archived)

i had sex with a one legged football subsitute from san paolo
it was probably the same person
(Mortal Wombat - he's just an excitable boy, Fri 22 Jul 2011, 0:46, archived)

i just want it to be known i'd like this to go straight to the PP
ta.
(Mortal Wombat - he's just an excitable boy, Fri 22 Jul 2011, 0:47, archived)

Yeah this guy had HIV
images1.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20090410232054/uncyclopedia/images/c/ce/Dolphin_rape.gif
( Major Turd for tonight only, Fri 22 Jul 2011, 1:08, archived)

lol. ride the walrus

(Mortal Wombat - he's just an excitable boy, Fri 22 Jul 2011, 1:15, archived)

i've always wanted to write a cartoon about a prehistroic family

( Lightguy hail satan, Fri 22 Jul 2011, 0:25, archived)

you could call them
the stoneflints
(Mortal Wombat - he's just an excitable boy, Fri 22 Jul 2011, 0:26, archived)

or you could just fuck off and top yourself
either either
(Mortal Wombat - he's just an excitable boy, Fri 22 Jul 2011, 0:28, archived)

If this cartoon really matters to you, then I might like to help.
Your idea is really derivative, mind.
Can you spell "prehistoric" or was this just a pisstake? The Flintstones missed a lot of untapped stuff, I wouldn't just reboot the concept because we give away our royalties.
(grumble finegold, Fri 22 Jul 2011, 0:35, archived)

Even though that is exactly what is happening?

( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Fri 22 Jul 2011, 0:45, archived)

lol x

( mns 2️⃣2️⃣9️⃣0️⃣7️⃣, Fri 22 Jul 2011, 0:27, archived)

I'm sorry to hear that you have HIV
I can't imagine what that's like.
( WormuIus, Fri 22 Jul 2011, 0:35, archived)

Shock, concern, fear.
As a straight man, I only had two partners last year.
(grumble finegold, Fri 22 Jul 2011, 0:38, archived)

if you'd ahve played it safe and had none in the last three like me
you wouldn't be in this mess
(Mortal Wombat - he's just an excitable boy, Fri 22 Jul 2011, 0:41, archived)

I'm a bit drunk
You look a bit drunk.

Now would be the perfect time for us to have our inevitable to the death b3ta duel.
( WormuIus, Fri 22 Jul 2011, 0:43, archived)

do you mind if we dont?
i'm just about to get into the bath and drown myself
(Mortal Wombat - he's just an excitable boy, Fri 22 Jul 2011, 0:45, archived)

Please don't kill yourself
not for your sake, but I'd hate to feel responsible.
( WormuIus, Fri 22 Jul 2011, 0:47, archived)

no you wouldn't

(Mortal Wombat - he's just an excitable boy, Fri 22 Jul 2011, 0:53, archived)

I hope its some comfort that HIV is a manageable condition
and the public perception of it is close to neutral these days.

At least you don't have cancer, Parkisons or Alzheimers.
( WormuIus, Fri 22 Jul 2011, 0:42, archived)

unless it does
as well i mean. imagine all four. fucking hell the NHS would just toss you down the laundry chute
(Mortal Wombat - he's just an excitable boy, Fri 22 Jul 2011, 0:44, archived)

Agreed and agreed
Diabeties is worse these days, I have been assured. But it does give pause for thought, and a thought I wanted to bring to a messageboard.

What do you want? Did something recently make you stop and think I could find something I wanted but never made a move to get it? The time for fear is over.
(grumble finegold, Fri 22 Jul 2011, 0:48, archived)

well getting HIV certainly hasn't nulled your ability to be an inane gibbering gobshite
has it
(Mortal Wombat - he's just an excitable boy, Fri 22 Jul 2011, 0:50, archived)

In fairness to Deaf Satan
Even his irritating, fake AIDS banter is about 250% better than anything you could ever post on here, even if something (other than being a paedophile) was wrong with you.
( WormuIus, Fri 22 Jul 2011, 0:52, archived)

I think it's fairly safe to say that if MW was diagnosed with a terminal illness, not a single fuck would be given.

( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Fri 22 Jul 2011, 0:54, archived)

i'm terminally handsome
i gots some KILLER looks! lolololol
(Mortal Wombat - he's just an excitable boy, Fri 22 Jul 2011, 0:55, archived)

*runs away crying*

(Mortal Wombat - he's just an excitable boy, Fri 22 Jul 2011, 0:54, archived)

B O O H O O

( WormuIus, Fri 22 Jul 2011, 0:55, archived)

I think you mean
A BLOO BLOO BLOO
( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Fri 22 Jul 2011, 0:57, archived)

I am not afraid of anything except being unfairly judged without having the opportunity to speak
and that fucking disgusting shadowy alien from the end of Close Encounters.
( WormuIus, Fri 22 Jul 2011, 0:50, archived)

I'm sure we can all aids you at this difficult time.

( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Fri 22 Jul 2011, 0:40, archived)

I see what you did there.

( WormuIus, Fri 22 Jul 2011, 0:48, archived)

*finger guns*

( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Fri 22 Jul 2011, 0:48, archived)

Yes.
The time for fear is over!
(grumble finegold, Fri 22 Jul 2011, 0:52, archived)

Woah, I thought they eradicated that in the seventies.

( Harold Bishop's Love Child some sort of terrifying sex magician., Fri 22 Jul 2011, 0:48, archived)

no, that was thatcherism

(Mortal Wombat - he's just an excitable boy, Fri 22 Jul 2011, 0:51, archived)

Same thing.

( Harold Bishop's Love Child some sort of terrifying sex magician., Fri 22 Jul 2011, 0:54, archived)

They could show Top Gun again
that might be enough
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Fri 22 Jul 2011, 0:52, archived)