it's beer time you turd flinging maniacs

(Literally Hitler stop playing with my jewlirium, Thu 21 Jan 2021, 17:04, archived)

I'm not even home yet,

(Nicki Minaj, Thu 21 Jan 2021, 17:14, archived)

fuck that you're usually home by midday
what's the hold up?
(Literally Hitler stop playing with my jewlirium, Thu 21 Jan 2021, 17:19, archived)

it's not dick fucking turpentine again is it?

(Literally Hitler stop playing with my jewlirium, Thu 21 Jan 2021, 17:28, archived)

Just chatting shit with another bloke I work with, he cant leave till 4 because he's tracked

(Nicki Minaj, Thu 21 Jan 2021, 18:10, archived)

has he woken up in a dystopian nightmare?

(Literally Hitler stop playing with my jewlirium, Thu 21 Jan 2021, 18:17, archived)

Yeah he's a van mobile engineer. Its awful big brother shit

(Nicki Minaj, Thu 21 Jan 2021, 18:28, archived)

can't he just cut the tracker out of his eyeball or something?

(Literally Hitler stop playing with my jewlirium, Thu 21 Jan 2021, 18:35, archived)

No because it's in the van. Most vehicle leasing places insist on trackers now for insurance

(Nicki Minaj, Thu 21 Jan 2021, 18:45, archived)

oh right. see i'd put it in his eye. i dunno. just thinking outside the box i suppose.

(Literally Hitler stop playing with my jewlirium, Thu 21 Jan 2021, 19:03, archived)

No your thinking of total recall

(Nicki Minaj, Thu 21 Jan 2021, 21:38, archived)

Up the bum, no harm done apart from rectal damage and it'll stop his poo coming out

(dribble, Thu 21 Jan 2021, 21:47, archived)

You say that like it's a bad thing.

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Thu 21 Jan 2021, 23:00, archived)

yes it is

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Thu 21 Jan 2021, 17:30, archived)

hooray let's party like it's covid 1999

(Literally Hitler stop playing with my jewlirium, Thu 21 Jan 2021, 17:32, archived)

fuck that, might just have a cuppa

( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Thu 21 Jan 2021, 17:30, archived)

well where did you lose your party hat you boring bastard

(Literally Hitler stop playing with my jewlirium, Thu 21 Jan 2021, 17:32, archived)

I read that in a vyvyan voice

(dribble, Thu 21 Jan 2021, 18:06, archived)

Not out loud, that'd be weird

(dribble, Thu 21 Jan 2021, 18:06, archived)

and you'd never behave in a way that might make people think you were weird

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 21 Jan 2021, 18:14, archived)

Not offline

(dribble, Thu 21 Jan 2021, 18:18, archived)

just keep your router switched on

(Literally Hitler stop playing with my jewlirium, Thu 21 Jan 2021, 18:20, archived)

time for a cocktail
now that the mandatory bit of physical exercise for the day is done
( Turing's Artificial Hand Sig Sauer, Thu 21 Jan 2021, 18:15, archived)

after work wanks are the best

(Literally Hitler stop playing with my jewlirium, Thu 21 Jan 2021, 18:18, archived)

nah man, during work wanks are the best

( Turing's Artificial Hand Sig Sauer, Thu 21 Jan 2021, 18:20, archived)

Wanking from home

(dribble, Thu 21 Jan 2021, 18:21, archived)

pfffft!

(Literally Hitler stop playing with my jewlirium, Thu 21 Jan 2021, 18:22, archived)

Fairly sure I saw an article on the beeb the other day telling people to masturbate because it's safer than going out on a date and catching the virus
can't find it now
(dribble, Thu 21 Jan 2021, 18:24, archived)

i haven't been able to find a date for years
maybe it's this moustache
(Literally Hitler stop playing with my jewlirium, Thu 21 Jan 2021, 18:25, archived)

i don't work in a heavily pimped industry

(Literally Hitler stop playing with my jewlirium, Thu 21 Jan 2021, 18:21, archived)

Got back on it
No sleep tonight, still got a good few stripes left
( Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Fri 22 Jan 2021, 1:38, archived)