It's the end of another week (sad)
but it's the start of a bank holiday weekend (happy)

MORNING!
( garold you're on mute I SAID YOU'RE ON MUTE, Fri 28 May 2021, 7:48, archived)

It's not a bank holiday here (indifferent)
morning
(The Porcupine From Purgatory katsu revival trust, Fri 28 May 2021, 7:53, archived)

Don't be ashamed of being indifferent
god loves all his children
( garold you're on mute I SAID YOU'RE ON MUTE, Fri 28 May 2021, 8:00, archived)

morning, morning
I'm thinking of going keto. Anybody done it?
( Turing's Artificial Hand Sig Sauer, Fri 28 May 2021, 8:00, archived)

Morning
not me.
( garold you're on mute I SAID YOU'RE ON MUTE, Fri 28 May 2021, 8:01, archived)

Morning
No, and I wouldn't, but you knock yourself out.
(The Porcupine From Purgatory katsu revival trust, Fri 28 May 2021, 8:24, archived)

hmm
my brother lost a lot of weight on it

also lol: "keto is associated with a variety of unpleasant side-effects, including keto flu, keto breath, keto diarrhea, and keto crotch (an unpleasant vaginal odor)"
( Turing's Artificial Hand Sig Sauer, Fri 28 May 2021, 8:27, archived)

I do not have a vag, so whatevs

( Woodkovsky ☹️➝🚻➝🚽➝😣➝💩➝🧻➝😁, Fri 28 May 2021, 8:28, archived)

you *are* a vag, m8
with an unpleasant odour, to boot
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Fri 28 May 2021, 8:48, archived)

I'm very wary of all fad diets.
Exercise more and stop eating shite, that's usually enough for most people. However, as it says at the top of that page, low-carb diets can work for a morbidly obese person. It's just that in most cases, they don't.
(The Porcupine From Purgatory katsu revival trust, Fri 28 May 2021, 8:32, archived)

calories in < calories out = weight loss
amazing, who knew eh
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Fri 28 May 2021, 8:47, archived)

woah

( Turing's Artificial Hand Sig Sauer, Fri 28 May 2021, 8:51, archived)

ikr

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Fri 28 May 2021, 9:10, archived)

fuck no

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Fri 28 May 2021, 8:45, archived)

The bodyguard driver lifestyle wasn't for me

(dribble, Fri 28 May 2021, 9:48, archived)

I've got next week off innit

( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 28 May 2021, 8:02, archived)

OooOOoooh!

( garold you're on mute I SAID YOU'RE ON MUTE, Fri 28 May 2021, 8:17, archived)

*raises handbag*

( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 28 May 2021, 9:05, archived)

eww yew lurky durk

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Fri 28 May 2021, 8:49, archived)

Mrs Hats is getting her second jab on Sunday, so she'll be sick until Tuesday
I have an early hospital appointment one day, she has an appointment on another. It won't be the holiday of my dreams, but at least we don't have to do anything
( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 28 May 2021, 9:05, archived)

17 June for my jab #2, cannae wait, sick or not


lol number two - you know, like a shit!
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Fri 28 May 2021, 9:08, archived)

morning
as they say on "b3ta"
( Woodkovsky ☹️➝🚻➝🚽➝😣➝💩➝🧻➝😁, Fri 28 May 2021, 8:29, archived)

they DO!

( garold you're on mute I SAID YOU'RE ON MUTE, Fri 28 May 2021, 8:34, archived)

speak for yourself m8 - I never say that

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Fri 28 May 2021, 8:49, archived)

Dibnah

(The Porcupine From Purgatory katsu revival trust, Fri 28 May 2021, 11:02, archived)

Cut-me-own-rope

(dribble, Fri 28 May 2021, 11:43, archived)

My stress and anxiety levels are finally dropping
So I'm going to spend the weekend relaxing as much as possible
( Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Fri 28 May 2021, 8:31, archived)

Gonna be a sunny one, by all accounts
you a Pimms kind person? I don't think much of it, m'self. Shove that much fruit in a drink you could have ribena and meths at its core and it'd taste the same, but hey.
( garold you're on mute I SAID YOU'RE ON MUTE, Fri 28 May 2021, 8:36, archived)

my wife has a violent hatred of Pimms for some reason
I think it's from being forced to attend too many City corporate summer 'events'

#RichardsAnecdotes
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Fri 28 May 2021, 8:41, archived)

I turbo it with vodka

( mongychops, Fri 28 May 2021, 8:56, archived)

Pimm's is disgusting
Overpriced alcoholic fruit salad. Won't be sitting in the garden anyway, it's warm here but likely to be raining most of the weekend
( Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Fri 28 May 2021, 9:16, archived)

I'm very glad to see the back of this week tbh
what a load of shit

tl;dr morning
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Fri 28 May 2021, 8:48, archived)

Yep, the cuntery count has been high this week

( garold you're on mute I SAID YOU'RE ON MUTE, Fri 28 May 2021, 8:56, archived)

what is this cuntery coming to, etc.

( Turing's Artificial Hand Sig Sauer, Fri 28 May 2021, 8:57, archived)

well I never
they're unveiling a blue plaque for Hendrix just up the road from me today

www.eventbrite.co.uk/e/purple-haze-by-jimi-hendrix-newham-heritage-plaque-online-event-tickets-154687357049

I'll be walking past there tomorrow on our way out for a picnic
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Fri 28 May 2021, 9:06, archived)

"... excuse me, while I kiss this guy" wahh wahh wahh, wahh wahh sqeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!
( garold you're on mute I SAID YOU'RE ON MUTE, Fri 28 May 2021, 9:12, archived)

wow, it's like he's actually here right now

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Fri 28 May 2021, 9:17, archived)

I get an extra day off on Tuesday and all thanks to the queen
Gawd bless ya, yer majesty
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 28 May 2021, 9:50, archived)

b3ta.com/talk/8302899
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Fri 28 May 2021, 10:00, archived)

b3ta.com/talk/8302905
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 28 May 2021, 10:01, archived)

Once again I get my news from b3ta, DAMN YOU COVID 19

(dribble, Fri 28 May 2021, 10:05, archived)