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Thread II: The Shittening
Hey guy's how's it going?
(I helped save b3ta! Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Mon 26 Jul 2021, 11:31, archived)
sun's out bum's out

(sticklebrlcks link in bio ❤️🌟❤️, Mon 26 Jul 2021, 11:35, archived)
not here it's not

(I helped save b3ta! Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Mon 26 Jul 2021, 11:52, archived)
Way to give everyone deadly bum melanomas sticklebricks

(Agent Pr1ck llǝɯs ǝɥʇ sʇI ˙ǝɔɐld sᴉɥʇ ǝʇɐɥ l, Mon 26 Jul 2021, 22:40, archived)
Deadly Bum Melanomas are playing the Dublin Castle on Saturday

(sticklebrlcks link in bio ❤️🌟❤️, Tue 27 Jul 2021, 8:58, archived)
just totally knackered after the weekend lol

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Mon 26 Jul 2021, 11:44, archived)
lol

(I helped save b3ta! Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Mon 26 Jul 2021, 11:53, archived)
Going stir crazy in here
Snacking due to boredom and watching avengers films
(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Mon 26 Jul 2021, 11:46, archived)
how much longer do you have to stay home?

(I helped save b3ta! Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Mon 26 Jul 2021, 11:54, archived)
Only till Thursday
That is, assuming I test negative Thursday morning
(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Mon 26 Jul 2021, 12:56, archived)
nearly there

(I helped save b3ta! Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Mon 26 Jul 2021, 13:27, archived)
Told quite a few people that I'm stuck in till the 5th
Bc I don't want to see them
(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Mon 26 Jul 2021, 14:25, archived)
heh

(I helped save b3ta! Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Mon 26 Jul 2021, 14:26, archived)
I think you mean 'crazier'

(Agent Pr1ck llǝɯs ǝɥʇ sʇI ˙ǝɔɐld sᴉɥʇ ǝʇɐɥ l, Mon 26 Jul 2021, 22:38, archived)
All good

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Mon 26 Jul 2021, 12:09, archived)
nice one

(I helped save b3ta! Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Mon 26 Jul 2021, 12:18, archived)
What, everything?

(Agent Pr1ck llǝɯs ǝɥʇ sʇI ˙ǝɔɐld sᴉɥʇ ǝʇɐɥ l, Mon 26 Jul 2021, 22:37, archived)
I used to nip at the heels and bay at the moon, now I sit and stay like the good dogs do

(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Mon 26 Jul 2021, 14:11, archived)
no you never m8 dunt lie

(I helped save b3ta! Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Mon 26 Jul 2021, 14:30, archived)
I fuckin well did you can ask my m8

(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Mon 26 Jul 2021, 19:22, archived)
High queef, watched a film called Jolt last night, not sure if it was enjoyably shit or just shit, one of them

(I helped save b3ta! broadsword now that's fresh, Mon 26 Jul 2021, 14:23, archived)
Any tit in it?

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Mon 26 Jul 2021, 14:27, archived)
Nah just the one out of shooting fish with weird new fake pouty lips

(I helped save b3ta! broadsword now that's fresh, Mon 26 Jul 2021, 14:36, archived)
Shooting fish is a great film

(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Mon 26 Jul 2021, 15:49, archived)
not heard of that one tbh
just looked it up, looks like it could be amusing. I watched 'Criminal' the other day - I can't believe the cast they got for such a heap of wank. Someone must have been owed some massive favours.

'CIA agent Bill Pope is on a mission to save a hacker from a dreaded criminal. However, when the agent is mysteriously killed, his memories are grafted into Jerico Stewart, an ex-convict'

It's even shitter than it sounds like it would be
(I helped save b3ta! Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Mon 26 Jul 2021, 14:29, archived)
wow, that does sound stupid

(I helped save b3ta! Turing's Artificial Hand Sig Sauer, Mon 26 Jul 2021, 14:36, archived)
Tommy Lee Jones, Gary Oldman, Kevin Costner, Gal Gadot, Ryan Reynolds....
I suspect money laundering or a tax write off
(I helped save b3ta! Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Mon 26 Jul 2021, 14:43, archived)
ah, good old 'film investment schemes'

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Mon 26 Jul 2021, 15:25, archived)
aka a 'Gary Barlow special'

(I helped save b3ta! Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Mon 26 Jul 2021, 15:27, archived)
I saw one once where the chap's earned income was 10 mill, with a 4 mil income tax liabilty
So he wrote out a cheque for 2 million to enter the scheme, received a tax rebate of 4 million, and so was treated for tax purposes as if he'd earned 50 grand in the tax year rather than 10 million.

Nice work if you can get it eh.
(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Mon 26 Jul 2021, 15:36, archived)
That smells of cow plops to me

(I helped save b3ta! broadsword now that's fresh, Mon 26 Jul 2021, 15:42, archived)
dozer's breath, you mean

(I helped save b3ta! Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Mon 26 Jul 2021, 15:45, archived)
nah m8, 100% on the level
Those schemes were legit at the time (though engineered specifically to egregiously avoid tax), but HMRC clamped down hard on them subsequently.

I could go into detail about how the schemes actually worked but even I find it deathly boring.
(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Mon 26 Jul 2021, 15:55, archived)
surely that was only ever legal because someone forgot to make it illegal

(I helped save b3ta! Turing's Artificial Hand Sig Sauer, Mon 26 Jul 2021, 15:57, archived)
it was the 'film partnership' schemes
you'd 'borrow' 97% of your participation from the scheme provider, write a cheque for the 3%, then it would just so happen that 40% of your total investment (including the borrowed bit, which was interest only) would equal your income tax bill. To pay the interest on the 'loan' bit you just assigned your partnership income from the film to the lender.

Then, before the 15 year (iirc) tax relived period was up you'd pay a firm a relatively small sum to buy your partnership investment from you, at which point your deferred tax bill essentially vanished (it would be based on the huge sum funded by the loan).

HMRC then slapped huge tax bills on people based on total participation amount rather than the amount of the cheque written when they decided the schemes were not intended to finance films after all.

I TOLD YOU IT WAS BORING.
(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Mon 26 Jul 2021, 16:05, archived)
dodgy tax dodge is dodgy

(I helped save b3ta! Turing's Artificial Hand Sig Sauer, Mon 26 Jul 2021, 16:14, archived)
yeah, it was morally reprehensible

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Mon 26 Jul 2021, 16:16, archived)
pretty lol though when one client complained and said they hadn't understood what they were buying into.
Her day job was a tax lawyer, designing these exact schemes.
(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Mon 26 Jul 2021, 16:18, archived)
ok that is lol

(I helped save b3ta! Turing's Artificial Hand Sig Sauer, Mon 26 Jul 2021, 16:26, archived)
Someone watched legally blonde one too many times

(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Mon 26 Jul 2021, 17:34, archived)
she was just lying; she'd only made a personal contribution of 20 grand to get a 40 grand rebate, and was being hit with a tax demand many multiples of that.

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Mon 26 Jul 2021, 17:56, archived)
Yup that sounds pretty plop.
Jolt didn't take itself too seriously but about 1/3 of the film was clearly setting up Jolt 2 - Jolty Boogaloo
(I helped save b3ta! broadsword now that's fresh, Mon 26 Jul 2021, 14:42, archived)
If that's that film about that shitting dog it can fuck right off
Dogs are shit and for cunts
(Agent Pr1ck llǝɯs ǝɥʇ sʇI ˙ǝɔɐld sᴉɥʇ ǝʇɐɥ l, Mon 26 Jul 2021, 22:37, archived)
Do elephants next

(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Tue 27 Jul 2021, 4:12, archived)
I saw a big rainbow as I was driving home.
Bit gay really
(Agent Pr1ck llǝɯs ǝɥʇ sʇI ˙ǝɔɐld sᴉɥʇ ǝʇɐɥ l, Mon 26 Jul 2021, 22:36, archived)