I've cleaned the house, put the washing on, done me cycling, I'm at a bit of a loose end now
Mrs left for India this morning so I've no partner in crime to cook a roast for. Been looking forward to a bit of peace and quiet for ages and now I have it I don't know what to do. Might go to Borough and buy a ludicrously expensive cheese slicer and a Ginger Pig sausage roll
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 12:26, archived)

might bumhole a beagle, also

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 12:27, archived)

oven gap tho

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 12:29, archived)

i might rectify a rhombus

( MiseryCunt why is my arse getting further away, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 12:32, archived)

Time to bust out the GameCube and play a bit of Luigi's Mansion

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Sun 17 Nov 2024, 12:48, archived)

Might do an early breakbeat hardcore mix
By which I of course mean 'a big splattery shit'
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 13:01, archived)

On top?

(( * )( * ) ( . Y . ) ( ͜ₒ ㅅ ͜ ₒ), Sun 17 Nov 2024, 18:00, archived)

Reminds me of that gag from the St. Trinian's film
"Just got back from India, my mate's getting married."
"Hen do?"
"No, she's Church of England"
( Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 15:57, archived)

I've just been playing cards with my girlfriend
poker?

no but we snogged a bit
(sticklebricks link in bio ❤️🌟❤️, Sun 17 Nov 2024, 16:59, archived)

Liquor in the front
Poker in the rear
(( * )( * ) ( . Y . ) ( ͜ₒ ㅅ ͜ ₒ), Sun 17 Nov 2024, 18:01, archived)