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# Can someone tell me
what the best thing to do is when you've rubbed your eyeballs with Swarfega, please?
(I helped save b3ta! Jabberwoc misses D.R. and Quinch, Sun 3 Jun 2012, 20:59, archived)
# Plucking.
(I helped save b3ta! Tahkcalb ω∞ for sigs, Sun 3 Jun 2012, 21:00, archived)
# I don't know what Swarfega is. But I'd suggest washing your face in vodka, then setting it alight.
(I helped save b3ta! Mu Dinofiddler, Sun 3 Jun 2012, 21:01, archived)
# Swarfega, lime jelly for real men.
(I helped save b3ta! FeralCatMan Unusual disease collector., Sun 3 Jun 2012, 21:11, archived)
# I wiki'd.
My suggestion would be to READ THE FUCKING LABEL NUMBNUTS.
(I helped save b3ta! Mu Dinofiddler, Sun 3 Jun 2012, 21:12, archived)
# SO IT SAYS ON VODKA BOTTLES TO WASH YOUR FACE WITH IT, CUNTBUBBLE.
(I helped save b3ta! FeralCatMan Unusual disease collector., Sun 3 Jun 2012, 21:33, archived)
# IT DAMN WELL DOES, FANNYSMEAR!
(I helped save b3ta! Mu Dinofiddler, Sun 3 Jun 2012, 21:39, archived)
# PICS OR GTFO
(I helped save b3ta! FeralCatMan Unusual disease collector., Sun 3 Jun 2012, 21:41, archived)
# DO NOT USE ON SCROTUM OR PENIS
(I helped save b3ta! RedHouse over yonder, Sun 3 Jun 2012, 21:57, archived)
# Hahaha
(I helped save b3ta! FeralCatMan Unusual disease collector., Sun 3 Jun 2012, 22:14, archived)
# You urgently need to squeeze your face on a photocopier and press the 'copy' button
(I helped save b3ta! Jahled Three shades of black, Sun 3 Jun 2012, 21:05, archived)
#
if it's the basic swarfega, just rinse with clean water - try sticking your face under the shower and blinking rapidly

the materials safety data sheet says it's not toxic but "may cause temporary eye irritation", translation: may sting like buggery
(I helped save b3ta! empire of the pussycat requires more champage, Sun 3 Jun 2012, 21:14, archived)
# Fuck you and your sensible advice.
(I helped save b3ta! Mu Dinofiddler, Sun 3 Jun 2012, 21:15, archived)
# ^this
I hadn't had a chance to get to the ketchup stage for fucks sake
(I helped save b3ta! Jahled Three shades of black, Sun 3 Jun 2012, 21:17, archived)
# Do NOT attempt to wash it out quickly or thoroughly.
Instead, go to a silly website where you know you'll get bad advice while the swarfega dissolves your cornea.
(I helped save b3ta! 4Q just lurking, Sun 3 Jun 2012, 21:21, archived)
#
silly bloody ludicrous
(I helped save b3ta! FeralCatMan Unusual disease collector., Sun 3 Jun 2012, 21:46, archived)
# Grab yourself a mirror, and marvel at how grease-free your eyes now seem to be
(I helped save b3ta! drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Sun 3 Jun 2012, 21:24, archived)
# Spork them
(I helped save b3ta! mediocre ha ha ha, you're reading this, Sun 3 Jun 2012, 21:25, archived)
# Thanks for all of the advice but
I think I'll just let my eyes dissolve...

Then I won't have to look at this picture again.
(I helped save b3ta! Jabberwoc misses D.R. and Quinch, Sun 3 Jun 2012, 22:28, archived)