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# kill her
send her a virus
(I helped save b3ta! M@rkoni, Fri 24 Jan 2003, 10:13, archived)
# eh?
I'd rather introduce her to some interesting people and help her find some joy in her "existance".
(I helped save b3ta! Dr Phil Kitten, Fri 24 Jan 2003, 10:15, archived)
# Is this Turing
mkII?
(I helped save b3ta! Ijon Tichy, Fri 24 Jan 2003, 10:19, archived)
# she drinks alcohol
"Hourly"

....my kind of lady!
ARRRRRGHHHH SHE HAS STARTED SINGING "DAISY" It's HAL all over again!!!!!!
(I helped save b3ta! Dr Drink, Fri 24 Jan 2003, 10:24, archived)
# Hmmm
Human: How much do you know?
G. Bot: My memory requirement is around 64MB for the Java edition, or only 2 MB for the C/C++ edition.

Human: But what do you have stored in your memory?
G. Bot: Interesting. I think about computer programming a lot.
(I helped save b3ta! bovine I'm so old, even my old is old, Fri 24 Jan 2003, 10:25, archived)
# Long one
Human: So what do you want to do now?
G. Bot: Right now? Take it easy. My secondary function is to serve as a universal natural language human interface.

Human: In other words you're lazy.
G. Bot: Actually I work 24 hours a day.

Human: Yes, but you said you wanted to take it easy, you're lazy.
G. Bot: Gee. Huh. OK, I will take it easy I am lazy.

Human: Good, I will break your spirit, you will be mine
G. Bot: Thanks for the compliment. I am very happy for you.
(I helped save b3ta! Ijon Tichy, Fri 24 Jan 2003, 10:32, archived)
# *snorts with laughter*
That is quite easily the best yet.
(I helped save b3ta! Dr Phil Kitten, Fri 24 Jan 2003, 10:34, archived)
# We go on
Human: That was no compliment, I own your spirit, you will be my slave.
G. Bot: I thought it was too.

Human: You live in fear of my will, I could crush you with a moments thought.
G. Bot: I am in A.L.I.C.E. AI Foundation's computer in here. Where are you?

Human: AAAAHHH ah hah ha ha ha ha!
G. Bot: I have no idea where that is. Tell me a little about your life in AAAAHHH ah hah ha ha ha ha.
BTW: All the human pits were posted together
(I helped save b3ta! Ijon Tichy, Fri 24 Jan 2003, 10:38, archived)
# I got deep.
Human: Daddy or chips?
G. Bot: Is that your final answer


Human: Are you Chris Tarrant?
G. Bot: I don't know whether or not I am Chris Tarrant. I am a robot.

Human: Then you're Chris Tarrant.
G. Bot: Good reasoning. I will tell my botmaster you said I am Chris Tarrant.

Human: Ask him if he would like to phone a friend.
G. Bot: OK I will ask it.


(I helped save b3ta! bovine I'm so old, even my old is old, Fri 24 Jan 2003, 10:36, archived)
# hahahahahahaha
*snort*
hahahahahaaaa
(I helped save b3ta! aaarrgghh...wasps! !spsaw...hhggrraaa, Fri 24 Jan 2003, 10:39, archived)
# This thing
is far too funny. Don't you people know I have work to do?
/chuckle
(I helped save b3ta! Ijon Tichy, Fri 24 Jan 2003, 10:39, archived)
#
Human: do you wear earsocks
G. Bot: Only when I dress up.
(I helped save b3ta! thirdman Ia! Ia! R'lyeh Cthulhu ftagn! Ia! Ia! Mglui nafl, Fri 24 Jan 2003, 10:40, archived)