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# A man sitting on a chairs.
(I helped save b3ta! Ttssattsr, Fri 14 Nov 2008, 14:39, archived)
# then what happaned?
(I helped save b3ta! Prof UnderCover evitable, Fri 14 Nov 2008, 14:39, archived)
# He feels a sense of enourmous tedium.
(I helped save b3ta! Ttssattsr, Fri 14 Nov 2008, 14:41, archived)
# unexpected not wanting to buy the screenplay
POWER!
(I helped save b3ta! Prof UnderCover evitable, Fri 14 Nov 2008, 14:42, archived)
# ARGH. MY MIND UNRAVELS.
(I helped save b3ta! Ttssattsr, Fri 14 Nov 2008, 14:43, archived)
# EMBRACE THE UNIVERSAL ELECTRICITY
(I helped save b3ta! Prof UnderCover evitable, Fri 14 Nov 2008, 14:43, archived)
# *shimmers*
(I helped save b3ta! Ttssattsr, Fri 14 Nov 2008, 14:44, archived)
# [sound effects]
(I helped save b3ta! Prof UnderCover evitable, Fri 14 Nov 2008, 15:07, archived)
# The chair is upside down
he is actually not so much sitting as taking a chair leg in the anus, he's greased it up with chip fat and is sliding up and down, moaning gently. The man in question is in fact third-rate badger eater Bear Grylls and he's being filmed for the new series of "I'm a Celebrity"
(I helped save b3ta! Wasp Box like a nervous random stranger at a glory hole, Fri 14 Nov 2008, 14:42, archived)
# Furthermore he is a busty cat.
WAIT, NO.
(I helped save b3ta! Ttssattsr, Fri 14 Nov 2008, 14:43, archived)
# I heartily endorse this idea
Esther Rantzen wanking him off would be the flourish
(I helped save b3ta! emvee cruor deo cruoris, Fri 14 Nov 2008, 14:46, archived)
# were you at the recording?
She wanked him off into the waiting gob of Brian Paddick, who gulped it down hungrily.
(I helped save b3ta! Wasp Box like a nervous random stranger at a glory hole, Fri 14 Nov 2008, 14:47, archived)
# while George Takei took her roughly up the Gary
I, er, borrowed the tape afterwards
(I helped save b3ta! emvee cruor deo cruoris, Fri 14 Nov 2008, 14:48, archived)
# The funny thing was
that it turned out George was born without a penis and was merely waggling his bollocks in the direction of Esther's grapes and winnets, there was no penetration at all.
(I helped save b3ta! Wasp Box like a nervous random stranger at a glory hole, Fri 14 Nov 2008, 14:52, archived)
# poor George
but the way it's shot you really can't tell
(I helped save b3ta! emvee cruor deo cruoris, Fri 14 Nov 2008, 14:54, archived)
# when he was filming Star Trek
he used to put David Rappappapapapop down his trousers to form the appearance of his famous prehensile cock.
(I helped save b3ta! Wasp Box like a nervous random stranger at a glory hole, Fri 14 Nov 2008, 14:57, archived)
# I didn't believe the wife at first when she told me he was in that .... programme.
(I helped save b3ta! ivesb Highly specialised Clinical Physiologist crapbag, Fri 14 Nov 2008, 14:57, archived)
# Is he?
I assumed emvee had made it up.
Bear Grylls isn't really in it is he? I definitely made that up!

edit/ just went to the ITV site to check and was immediately confronted with the headline "I'm Bear Grylls!"
(I helped save b3ta! Wasp Box like a nervous random stranger at a glory hole, Fri 14 Nov 2008, 14:59, archived)
# I actually know who 6 out 10 of them are
that's not bad going
(I helped save b3ta! Wasp Box like a nervous random stranger at a glory hole, Fri 14 Nov 2008, 15:02, archived)
# I picked up either the bog paper or the london shite this week
otherwise I'd have no idea
(I helped save b3ta! emvee cruor deo cruoris, Fri 14 Nov 2008, 15:22, archived)
# while Ant' and Dec' looked on embarrased and uneasy
as they have never yet been able to express their love for one another...
(I helped save b3ta! Prof UnderCover evitable, Fri 14 Nov 2008, 14:48, archived)
# Well; if that's the kind of thing you like to see....

(I helped save b3ta! JollyJack - a stench from the past, Fri 14 Nov 2008, 14:45, archived)
# You did it wrroooonnnnnnng.
Baaaaaaaawwww.
(I helped save b3ta! Ttssattsr, Fri 14 Nov 2008, 14:46, archived)
# That man is not enough of a smug wanker
to be Bear Grylls.
(I helped save b3ta! chenobble rocking his explorer beard on, Fri 14 Nov 2008, 14:46, archived)
# hahahaha!!!
(I helped save b3ta! ivesb Highly specialised Clinical Physiologist crapbag, Fri 14 Nov 2008, 14:46, archived)
# bloody hell
that never happened before
(I helped save b3ta! emvee cruor deo cruoris, Fri 14 Nov 2008, 14:47, archived)
# I don't know what sort of accent Bear Grylls has
but it's close enough.
(I helped save b3ta! Wasp Box like a nervous random stranger at a glory hole, Fri 14 Nov 2008, 14:47, archived)
# hahaha
(I helped save b3ta! prodigy69 broke b3ta and made everyone leave, Fri 14 Nov 2008, 14:49, archived)
# ha ha ha
"... I'm not sure nurse - I was putting some curtains up and I fell backwards and next thing I knew I had a chair up my arse..."
(I helped save b3ta! Prof UnderCover evitable, Fri 14 Nov 2008, 14:50, archived)
# "...no, no I don't know why the chair leg was greased with chip fat..."

(I helped save b3ta! Wasp Box like a nervous random stranger at a glory hole, Fri 14 Nov 2008, 14:53, archived)
# "... I ...erm.... think that to pull it out
you're probably going to have to push it in as hard and far as you can, repeatedly.... and call me a bitch while you spit into my eyes... I ... erm... think that's the only way... so I've heard..."
(I helped save b3ta! Prof UnderCover evitable, Fri 14 Nov 2008, 15:02, archived)