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Home » Messageboard » Unlikely Company Mergers » Message 9889840 (Thread)

[challenge entry] Apple Talbot revealed!

From the Unlikely Company Mergers challenge. See all 319 entries (closed)

(I helped save b3ta! dunk3d, Wed 27 Jan 2010, 12:32, archived)
# 4.0 megawheels!

(I helped save b3ta! mediocre ha ha ha, you're reading this, Wed 27 Jan 2010, 12:39, archived)
# apple talbot S
we've allowed you to have brakes!
(I helped save b3ta! monstrinho do biscoito teeeshurts = www.nogunarmy.com, Wed 27 Jan 2010, 12:59, archived)
# zomg! *buys eleventy to appear cool*
(I helped save b3ta! HappyToast Groat froth, Wed 27 Jan 2010, 12:41, archived)
# Ha! You jest
but if you stuck an apple sticker on it, people would queue around the block to get one.

People in their trendy scarves and trendy slimline glasses, probably holding a cup of starbuck coffee and a laptop bag slung over their shoulder...
(I helped save b3ta! Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Wed 27 Jan 2010, 12:49, archived)
# you forgot ambiguous ethnicity :D
(I helped save b3ta! PedroHin Come along & ride on a Flantastic Voyage, Wed 27 Jan 2010, 12:50, archived)
# RACIST.
(I helped save b3ta! Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Wed 27 Jan 2010, 12:51, archived)
# Don't forget the ambiguous sexuality
(I helped save b3ta! Snappyuk gets BIGGER with free sample., Wed 27 Jan 2010, 17:24, archived)
# Apple fanbois will buy anything
Mildly NSFW link
(I helped save b3ta! thirdman Ia! Ia! R'lyeh Cthulhu ftagn! Ia! Ia! Mglui nafl, Wed 27 Jan 2010, 12:52, archived)
# What the shuddering fuck?
(I helped save b3ta! Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Wed 27 Jan 2010, 12:53, archived)
# He's a Leo and a tard.
(I helped save b3ta! Whato_Jeeves Did your surgery require a vaginal mesh patch?, Wed 27 Jan 2010, 12:54, archived)
# oh dear!
I thought I deleted that adultfriendfinder account :/
(I helped save b3ta! PedroHin Come along & ride on a Flantastic Voyage, Wed 27 Jan 2010, 12:55, archived)
# My eyes! My beautiful, beautiful eyes!

(I helped save b3ta! mediocre ha ha ha, you're reading this, Wed 27 Jan 2010, 12:55, archived)
# fuck he's packing APPLES!
(I helped save b3ta! Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Wed 27 Jan 2010, 13:04, archived)
# Haha, priceless
(I helped save b3ta! simbosan is too tired, Wed 27 Jan 2010, 13:25, archived)
# Waistbands below their balls.
www.youtube.com/watch?v=lhAr_UeroCk

Thinking is rubbish, and rubbish isn't cool. Stuff and shit is cool.
(Seance Trumpet has got no beef with a man enjoying a croissant, Wed 27 Jan 2010, 14:08, archived)
# I rilly don't get the obsession with "cool" and "new" and "shiny"
Function - sure.

But I don't understand how Apple command such an adoring response in seemingly intelligent people.

Is it because they think owning gadgets will get them laid, finally?
(I helped save b3ta! Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Wed 27 Jan 2010, 12:50, archived)
# Maybe
*edit*

I'm a huge Apple fan - been a Mac user for years (professionally) but do not own a single gadget except for my somewhat battered Motorola Razr
(I helped save b3ta! bilbobarneybobs I'll be 14 in b3ta years soon., Wed 27 Jan 2010, 12:50, archived)
# ah you see that's different
you don't fall in the 'twats' category
(I helped save b3ta! Mighty Nibus who dares gins | @nibus, Wed 27 Jan 2010, 12:54, archived)
# why thank you sir
*edit* - you know - I'm going to have to pencil that Dales Walk thing in my Diary - so's I don't forget...
(I helped save b3ta! bilbobarneybobs I'll be 14 in b3ta years soon., Wed 27 Jan 2010, 12:58, archived)
# oh bugger
we haven't signed up for it yet - so it may be full

*runs away*
(I helped save b3ta! Mighty Nibus who dares gins | @nibus, Wed 27 Jan 2010, 13:01, archived)
# *frowns*
(I helped save b3ta! bilbobarneybobs I'll be 14 in b3ta years soon., Wed 27 Jan 2010, 13:04, archived)
# Heh
My father, mother and sister all have iPhones, iPods and Mac desktops/ laptops.

I'm the black sheep of the family.
(I helped save b3ta! The Coast Of Yemen, Wed 27 Jan 2010, 12:59, archived)
# Its fair enough to be a Mac user.
But the gadgets - seems like they're massively overpriced for massive underspec.
(I helped save b3ta! Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Wed 27 Jan 2010, 13:03, archived)
# iphone's good if excentricly designed
not bothered by anything else apple.
(I helped save b3ta! monstrinho do biscoito teeeshurts = www.nogunarmy.com, Wed 27 Jan 2010, 13:06, archived)
# there's an app for that
(I helped save b3ta! Mighty Nibus who dares gins | @nibus, Wed 27 Jan 2010, 12:50, archived)
# *kills with extreme prejudice, force, and absolute hatred*
(I helped save b3ta! Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Wed 27 Jan 2010, 12:51, archived)
# That was on CSI last night
"I need a torch"
*gets passed an iPhone*
*there's an app for that",...
(I helped save b3ta! bilbobarneybobs I'll be 14 in b3ta years soon., Wed 27 Jan 2010, 12:53, archived)
# It's because buying stuff makes you a happy more desirable person.
(I helped save b3ta! Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Wed 27 Jan 2010, 12:52, archived)
# Well that much is true - life is but a meaningless march towards death
And thus there is no point in not indulging oneself materialistically, but I still don't really understand why someone would want something "cool" instead of "good".
(I helped save b3ta! Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Wed 27 Jan 2010, 12:53, archived)
# because people are twats
(I helped save b3ta! Mighty Nibus who dares gins | @nibus, Wed 27 Jan 2010, 12:53, archived)
# They sure are
*shakes fist at people*
(I helped save b3ta! Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Wed 27 Jan 2010, 12:57, archived)
# It's because buying cool stuff makes you a happy more desirable person.
(I helped save b3ta! Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Wed 27 Jan 2010, 12:57, archived)
# Hahahahahahahaha
(I helped save b3ta! Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Wed 27 Jan 2010, 12:58, archived)
# Is it something to do with us being more materialistic nowadays? I do wonder.
Edit: No, it's exactly what MN said^
(I helped save b3ta! Whato_Jeeves Did your surgery require a vaginal mesh patch?, Wed 27 Jan 2010, 12:53, archived)
# i've never bought apple stuff, but they do come up with some nice-looking and usable* things
which everyone else then copies.
the way i look at it, apple fans with too much money are paying a premium to be the design and usability testers for the rest us. i'm glad of that

* apart from when steve's control-freakery has locked down what you can do with them
(I helped save b3ta! plentyofants more ghee, vicar?, Wed 27 Jan 2010, 13:02, archived)
# This
Is an excellent way of looking at it.

Next time I meet an Apple fan I shall simply say "Thank you for being so rich".
(I helped save b3ta! Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Wed 27 Jan 2010, 13:04, archived)
# That and they've managed to convince their target audience
that they are some sort of underdog by creating this rivalry with Microsoft. Of course, the people who fall for this don't realise that they're the underdog in the same way that Pepsi and Tesco are underdogs; in that Apple are a massive corporation who have chosen to compete directly with a slightly more massive corporation who are actually no worse than they are. Steve Jobs is a very clever man, having created the illusion that Apple is somehow "the liberals' choice" for IT related stuff, even though they have some business practices that make Wal Mart look like a philanthropic organisation.
(Seance Trumpet has got no beef with a man enjoying a croissant, Wed 27 Jan 2010, 14:15, archived)
# I've got a macbook pro
It's my second apple product after an ipod nano. It is functional. Sure, it's less open than linux or even windows but it performs its function very well. That said, I'm not a mac fanboi, I just like some of their stuff and not because it's shiny or new (it is, these are bonuses) but because it works well for what I want to do. I don't get all the fake hype around the tablet which no-one knows anything about. A lot of people seem to be saying "I'd never use this, it's clealy going to fail" without considering that other people might have other needs than theirs. Of course some people who have lots of money will buy one purely because it's a new, shiny apple product. These are what I like to call "idiots". We call them fanbois...that's an insult to people (like myself) who buy apple them for a good reason, just call them idiots.

/rant
(MrChimp previously Monsieur, Wed 27 Jan 2010, 18:25, archived)
# Arf!
(I helped save b3ta! The Coast Of Yemen, Wed 27 Jan 2010, 12:59, archived)