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This is a question Abusing freebies

A friend of mine recently attended a 'Champaign Lunch', where he was compelled drink as much fizzy stuff as he could between the first and last courses. In an ideal world we'd ask restaurant staff to tell us stories about fatties stuffing themselves at All You Can Eat places, but we recognise that our members don't all work in the catering trade, so for the rest of you - tell us something about abusing freebies. BTW: Bee puns = you fail.

(, Thu 8 Nov 2007, 14:16)
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Freebees from the National Lottery
About 9 years ago I was sent to Camelot’s head office in Exeter for a day of training. The day was completely pointless but I did get a free Camelot pen, some headed paper and best of all, a sample "Jackpot Winner" printout slip.

At the time, my best friend Neil was obsessed with the lottery; he was having trouble getting a job and was still living with his parents. All he ever talked about was winning the lottery, "When I win the lottery" this and "things will be different when I win the lottery" that. It really got on your tits after a while.

Neil was a practical joker. A couple of years previously he had posted me a fake court summons for an unpaid parking ticket, this had sent me running out of my halls of residence on the verge of a panic attack to phone my dad. Here was my chance to get my own back. I printed out a letter on the Camelot headed paper explaining that there had been an error in that weeks draw and that he had actually won the jackpot. I attached the sample winning printout slip and enclosed in the envelope the official Camelot pen. Apart from the winning slip being marked “Void” it looked authentic. At the very least he would think he was a millionaire and that all his worries were over for a few seconds before harsh reality dawned on him. I put the letter aside to post the next day.

That night the news had a report of a man who had shot himself in his attic because he thought he had won the lottery but hadn't. Shit. Would my prank horribly backfire? You have to understand that Neil was completely obsessed with the lottery; he hated his life and saw a big lottery win as his only way out. Neil was not in a stable frame of mind about the lottery and my prank could easily send him over the edge....

.... But the letter was so good! It looked so real, I would never get a better chance to get my own back and he would definitely fall for it!....Should I send it? Yes or no? Send it? Don’t send it? Get my own back or be a friend?

Did I send it? No. I wasn’t worried about abusing freebies from Camelot but I was worried about Neil’s mental state. I showed him the letter a few years later when he was a bit happier in life. He was stunned at how official it looked and thanked me for not pushing him into a fully-fledged mental breakdown.

Click "I like this" if you would have posted the letter.

EDIT - Fictional account of the letter being posted for the whingers (Yes that's right, "Fiction", like half the sodding QOTW entries).

In the end I thought, "Fuck it" and posted the letter, little realising the disastrous results my actions would cause. On receiving the letter Neil fell for it hook line and sinker. He went on a celebratory bender that lasted two weeks, maxing-out his credit cards and overdraft in the process. It wasn’t until he tried to claim his jackpot that he discovered that it was all a practical joke, but by this time he was twenty thousand pounds in debt and hooked on crack cocaine. In a fit of rage he murdered the newsagent who told him the bad news and burned his shop down, tragically killing his wife and two young children who were trapped upstairs. Neil is currently on 24-hour suicide watch at Broadmoor high security psychiatric hospital, where he is expected to remain for the rest of his natural life.
(, Thu 8 Nov 2007, 16:18, 5 replies)
so in short - this story is about somehting you didnt do and has a slight connection to a freebee. You could have lied and said you did send it to make the story a little interesting.

Rant over :)
(, Thu 8 Nov 2007, 17:10, closed)
Nicely done sir, I clicked but not because I'd have sent it...though I'd have been damn tempted too!
(, Thu 8 Nov 2007, 17:40, closed)
Ignore the idiot at the top, that was a very cool story! Grats on you for think about your friend and not your own satisfaction!
(, Thu 8 Nov 2007, 19:07, closed)
Thanks for the positive responses
Two out of three aint bad (as Meatloaf once sang).
(, Fri 9 Nov 2007, 9:38, closed)
Ive not done that either.

(, Mon 12 Nov 2007, 0:10, closed)

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