It's true. Men don't "get" women.
But why is it a surprise, given that women spectacularly fail to "get" men?

- Every little thing is not about "us". Sometimes we look bored because we're bored generally. If we're bored specifically with the relationship, you won't see us being bored because we'll be somewhere else.
- Yes, arguments are about winning or losing. Everything is. If you don't want to risk losing, don't play.
- Facts are facts, logic is logic, and emotions are emotions. We can tell the difference - why can't you?
- Yes, ego and perceived status are very important to men's sense of self-worth. Please do not undermine them and then act surprised that we get withdrawn, angry or upset.
- If we love you we'll be more than happy to be supportive and understanding for as long as it takes for you to fix the source of the problem. If you don't fix the source of the problem, or let us do it for you, we'll find it very hard not to start ignoring your grumbles because we think you just enjoy having something to complain about. Similarly, if we have a problem, we're much more likely to feel supported and understood by someone offering suggestions on how to fix the problem, rather than just endlessly exploring how we feel about it. Unless we just like having a moan, in which case, fill your boots.
- Yes, we like looking at women. Clothed or naked, it doesn't much matter, and it is no reflection on you because we just aren't thinking about you most of the time.

Feel free to add more.

And no, I'm not a sad frustrated single - my girlfriend is lovely and really does seem to "get" me, and I her. We make each other really happy. (Aw, bless, etc.)
( shinyshinyscalp less a man, more a way of life, Tue 9 Aug 2011, 13:35, 22 replies)

wow. you're a real prize.

( janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Tue 9 Aug 2011, 13:36, closed)

Everything he said is true.
I love him.
( AWPS, Tue 9 Aug 2011, 14:09, closed)

hang on.
that's yours?
( janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Tue 9 Aug 2011, 14:25, closed)

Oh janet.
It makes me do a sad face.
( TFD is sporting this season's finest necropants, Thu 11 Aug 2011, 1:15, closed)

Sometimes we just like to get naked cover ourselves in your blood and run around with a clawhammer
SO WHAT?
( Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Tue 9 Aug 2011, 13:39, closed)

Mmm naked

(Dwarfsmuggler Has hogtied Snow White, Tue 9 Aug 2011, 13:51, closed)

Mmmmm clawhammer.

( stuj (^(^;;^)^) GO TEAM SPIDERS!(^(^;;^)^), Tue 9 Aug 2011, 14:08, closed)

Mmmmm blood

(anvil, Tue 9 Aug 2011, 14:10, closed)

Mmm ourselves
Some people just don't get irony, do they?
( shinyshinyscalp less a man, more a way of life, Tue 9 Aug 2011, 14:22, closed)

oh, sorry. i think you just dropped ten thousand spoons.

( janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Tue 9 Aug 2011, 14:26, closed)

It's kind of you to notice
Finally
( shinyshinyscalp less a man, more a way of life, Tue 9 Aug 2011, 14:29, closed)

no, you misunderst...oh, never mind.

( janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Tue 9 Aug 2011, 15:07, closed)

Leave it, Janet
it's not worth it.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Tue 9 Aug 2011, 15:33, closed)

Don't forget putting their head on a stick afterward[s]

(Me, I'm not... in any way intoxicated, Tue 9 Aug 2011, 17:48, closed)

Some more
- Shopping is not recreation
- Yes, I probably do fancy your sister / best friend / my co-worker. So what? Surprisingly, I'm able to be attracted to someone and still function normally, without leaping on them and tearing their clothes off. Otherwise I'd probably not be able to make it to the end of the street.
- If you say that "Nothing's wrong", I'm going to act as though nothing is wrong. I know it's probably a lie, but I have no hope of following the tortuous path of assumed attitudes and imagined motives that have upset you, so I'll wait until you actually tell me something specific.
- I am not psychic
- I have no idea what X "meant by that". Men, in general, say what they mean to each other. The doublespeak nuances of female social interaction are a closed (and uninteresting) book to us
- I am not psychic. I know I've said this before, but it doesn't seem to be getting through to you
(moon monkey is busy making memories worth repressing, Tue 9 Aug 2011, 14:33, closed)

That's the spirit!
- If you want to talk to me in the house, stand or sit in the same room as me and talk. Don't carry on wandering from room to room while you look for your keys/shoes/knickers/whatever making me either annoy you by saying "what?" or annoy you by following you around like a puppy so I can hear whatever it is you're wittering on about.
- Socks and underpants do not need to be ironed. In fact, very few of my clothes do, except office clothes, because I buy ones that don't need ironing.
- Your jokes about multi-tasking are partly true. It's not so much that men can't do more than one thing at a time, but that we really can't fully concentrate on more than one thing at a time. Highly charged and emotional conversations on the State of The Relationship while we're driving to your mother's/the airport/work/a parent's funeral really aren't going to be productive for us or you.
- Sex is not only possible in places other than the bed, and at times other than last thing at night and weekend mornings, it's fun. Uncannily, if the only time you appear willing to engage sexually is last thing at night when we're tired anyway, sometimes you will be rejected by us yawning, falling asleep, etc.
( shinyshinyscalp less a man, more a way of life, Tue 9 Aug 2011, 14:58, closed)

She's really annoying,
and you're not getting any?

Wahey!
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Tue 9 Aug 2011, 15:28, closed)

looks that way
( enoughblueskyforsailorstrousers, Tue 9 Aug 2011, 21:22, closed)

so this is irony right?
again?
(sittingduck Attention seeking, bullshitting fuck-knuckle, Tue 9 Aug 2011, 15:43, closed)

Nope...
...it's ironing

Thang yew
( shinyshinyscalp less a man, more a way of life, Tue 9 Aug 2011, 16:00, closed)

I don't understand these repeated references to irony

I'M BEING IRONIC. IT'S A COMMENT ON HOW SEXIST MEN CAN BE! HONEST!
(Stiltzkin, Tue 9 Aug 2011, 16:17, closed)

Well, who would have thought it?
It figures.
(Chiliconcarne's Waiting What place is this, Histor?, Tue 9 Aug 2011, 21:31, closed)