Words for the vadge
Mrs Biscuit has got a right thing about having to call her ladybits "pretty" names.

She dislikes hairy clam and ladycave, but she has an allergic reaction to clunge and mimsy. I have no idea why, but when I try and be romantic and utter things like "Mmm, can I play in your mimsy" I don't get anything but a stony-faced grump-monster. I'm also forbidden from speaking of the fabled game of hiding the sausage in the nipsy, but that's for different reasons.

Needless to say, she does not like b3ta.

Perhaps I need a new Mrs. Biscuit.
(airbiscuit last dropped a meaty one in the lift on, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 9:45, 16 replies)

mimsy sounds like something walter the softie would say
here, you're not walter the softie are you? *turns you upside down for lunch money*
( spacefish bong!, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 9:48, closed)

clunge is good though
it sounds like the first power chord of a hard rock track

CLLLLLLUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNGGGGGGGGGGGGGGEEEEEEEEEE
( spacefish bong!, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 9:49, closed)

Squishmitten.

( Maffers I flow kinda strange like Spina Bifida footprints, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 9:51, closed)

Loada GASH
GASH !
(TwinkleFuckingToes Has a ingrown toe nail, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 10:01, closed)

What does she want you to call it?

( Bob Todd whee, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 10:03, closed)

Ya-ya
But even then it has to be 'pretty'. None of the likes of "let me spear your ya-ya with my throbbing tool".

FFS!
(airbiscuit last dropped a meaty one in the lift on, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 10:27, closed)

Holy fuck, is that what Divine Secrets of the Ya-ya Sisterhood is about?
Or the John Lennon track Ya Ya? "Sitting on the La La, waiting for the Ya Ya."

My fella and I call it a minge or a fanny. I sometimes call it my mutton tube but I've yet to train him to say it too.
( Bob Todd whee, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 14:18, closed)

Cuntbags
Moo Moo, Foo Foo, Flower, butterfly, front bum
(TwinkleFuckingToes Has a ingrown toe nail, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 10:40, closed)

Isn't nipsy a euphemism for the tradesman's entrance?
No wonder you're forbidden to speak of hiding sausages there.
( flake has nothing against your right leg, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 10:52, closed)

I think it is.

( Bob Todd whee, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 14:18, closed)

Fudge
Yeah, but I'm trying to think practically about it - what else am I meant to do when she's got the painters in? I mean it feels the same.

Yes, I am the king of chivalry!
(airbiscuit last dropped a meaty one in the lift on, Sat 10 Apr 2010, 1:42, closed)

try out "La Cucaracha" on her
Especially in your best latina accent. She'll think it's charming and refers to a horizontal dance of lurrrrrrrrve, but really it's just spanish for cockroach.
( Draconacticus Reject shampoo. Demand real poo!, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 11:19, closed)

If you asked an Aussie bird...
... if you could 'chuck yer muck' up her 'gash' then this is seen as a gracious and polite opening line in the higest of high society.
(Moominator missing the good stuff cos' the swear filter is on, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 15:18, closed)

What about "growler"?
I always liked that one. It is also the official name for the cat's head motif seen on Jaguar cars, which seems apposite given that John Prescott has two.
( Scrumper, Fri 9 Apr 2010, 19:48, closed)

My friends
Grew up with calling their parts 'wizard' for him and 'fairy' for her.

I know

it beggers belief..
( Herb Alpert's Taxi Driver I have very beautiful lips, Sat 10 Apr 2010, 2:02, closed)

furburger

(goorf, Sat 10 Apr 2010, 3:49, closed)

Just say cunt
Viz: "Can I fuck your cunt?"
(thefuckestuppest cheapened this, on, Tue 13 Apr 2010, 12:50, closed)