Call centre try to electrocute me
Someone has already mentioned Tiscali call centres as being pretty shit and I can only sympathise with them.

Tiscali used to supply my Broadband service as well as my phone service. Clearly these two were not compatible, because when the phone rang, the broadband would cut out, which wasn't very pleasing when I was trying to errm...play online games.

Several calls to the Tiscali call centre left me increasingly frustrated for several reasons:
- They didn't understand my problem (I appreciate they had limited knowledge of English, but the problem was fairly simple)
- They kept hanging up on me
- They promised call backs from supervisors, which never came

They tried to tell me I need to plug the modem into the MAIN BT socket in the house, this was downstairs, the PC was upstairs, this solution was not going to happen.

Finally they told me told to unscrew the front of the main BT socket and fiddle around with the wires inside*.

Now I'm not any kind of electrician or engineer, I know fuck all about such things, but I maintain to this day that Tiscali tried to get me to electrocute myself!

*Not exactly what they said, but this was the gist of it
(porkinator is a Rock n Roll nerd!, Thu 3 Sep 2009, 15:23, 14 replies)

You wouldnt get a shock from a phone line
I know this because mine was brought down by the snow back in February and I put it back up (the engineers couldnt get to me).
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Thu 3 Sep 2009, 15:30, closed)

Cheers
It's nice to know I wouldn't have been killed.

Still, they were fucking useless.
(porkinator is a Rock n Roll nerd!, Thu 3 Sep 2009, 15:35, closed)

Yup
i'm with Tiscali
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Thu 3 Sep 2009, 15:46, closed)

well, to be picky:
You could get a painful shock if a Ring Signal* is sent while you're touching the wires - 50v IIRC.

* Incoming call, not Goatse.
( The Incredible Sulk Finally remembered his password on, Thu 3 Sep 2009, 15:55, closed)

I bow down to your greater understanding of such things

( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Thu 3 Sep 2009, 16:46, closed)

And what about the current?
(Pope Jamiroquai III, Thu 3 Sep 2009, 19:54, closed)

Colonel, thankyou; but it's not so much 'greater understanding' as a 'good memory for useless tidbits'. You were technically correct* - a phone line in its default state is quite safe. However there have been cases whereby storms have brought down phone lines, but have also brought down power lines onto the phone lines, creating a circuit through the person trying to move/repair a 'harmless' phone line**.

There are rules to minimise this: Sometimes you'll have two seperate supplies, sometimes both services use the same poles in rural areas; but in almost all cases the power cables must be strung above the phone cables. This reduces the odds of a phone line contacting a power line, and also eliminates the need for phone engineers to climb above live wires to do their thing. I understand that power cables are generally better-anchored and less likely to come unstuck.

Pope; I have no idea of the actual voltage (wikipedia says: In Europe it is around 60-90 volts AC); nor any idea of the current (which would probably be dependent on how good a circuit you were making***).

* The best kind of correct.
** With a negative outcome for the would-be repairman. So if you find yourself in this situation again, be aware of the risk of that innocent cable carrying hefty voltage from another fault you can't see. Even if it's safe 'now', you never know what a distant autorecloser could be trying to do with a faulting kV line and your arse.
*** IE - how well you earthed yourself. Dangle from an overhead power line, holding on with one hand = no harm. Touch the pylon with one hand and the cable with the other = pain, much pain, closely followed by fall and death.

A disclaimer: I am not an electrician, nor a linesman; don't rely on me being accurate.
( The Incredible Sulk Finally remembered his password on, Fri 4 Sep 2009, 7:49, closed)

The main socket isn't really Tiscali's problem
Fairly standard with any ISP since BT engineers come out and have no responsibility beyond the master socket…
( ||lll||ll||lll|| ||lll||ll||lll||, Thu 3 Sep 2009, 15:40, closed)

Not entirely their fault, I suspect...
If your internet fails when the phone rings, that's the classic symptom of not having installed a microfilter (correctly) on every socket in the house.

This also includes your alarm if it's phone enabled!
(Nicklock, Thu 3 Sep 2009, 16:11, closed)

I was a bit comfused by this
Until I realised you didn't mean the ringy thing that wakes you up in the morning.
(Vice Admiral Sir Charles Cockbrush KCB MBE DSO, who is finding it increasingly difficult to log into b3ta.com wants to duck your aunt and kick your puppy, Thu 3 Sep 2009, 17:24, closed)

He probably means some sort of phone-line-connected burglar alarm or one of those 'I've fallen and I can't get up' things that old people have.
(Pope Jamiroquai III, Thu 3 Sep 2009, 19:53, closed)

The "I've fallen and I can't get up bit" in there made me do a real lol :)

(Professor Kenny Martin Hmm? What?, Sun 6 Sep 2009, 2:31, closed)

"Oh Vic I've fallen"

( eXOBeX, Thu 10 Sep 2009, 0:45, closed)

Test Socket
Newer BT master sockets have a hidden test socket under the faceplate, which is used for things like testing for noise on the line. This may be what they were driving at. Taking that level of technical advice from Tiscali is probably not a good idea though...
(13thfloor, Fri 4 Sep 2009, 17:39, closed)