IT helpdesk woes.
I work remotely from a different office which is not directly connected to the company server. However, due to a bit of technical jiggery pokery, I can access it using the miracle of technology and a specially set up PC. I think it's powered by pixies. Or maybe kittums.

Anyway, all has been well in the year or so I've been based where I am, until the last couple of weeks. I can no longer access the Agency desktop properly - I can't open any documents, and the web-based applications are nightmarishly slow. So I rang the helpdesk, and asked to speak to Colin. Colin's great; nothing is too much trouble for him and he'll go to the far end of a fart to help you. This, however, would take a few days as it's classed as a low priority (I can still email unopenable documents to my host office's system, y'see. But it's still a bit of a pain not being able to access the intranet properly).

A few days later I got an email saying the problem was fixed, so I tried logging on - to be confronted with the same problem. Again, I spoke to Colin, who tried something technical and asked me to log off and then back on again, once more to no avail. Hmm. Colin sounded a bit puzzled, but endeavoured to keep trying.

Once more, I got a message to say the problem was fixed; once more I logged back on only to be met with a wall of inactivity and icons in funny colours... this carried on for a few more attempts, before Colin got more and more exasperated at not being able to sort the problem for me. "I'll keep trying; meanwhile, just don't log on for the next few hours".

About three hours later, the door to my office buzzed and two strangers came sauntering through the door. Looking for me, it transpired. "Are you DG?" one of them asked.

"Erm, yeah. What can I do for you?"

"You're having trouble with your PC; we thought we'd come out and have a look at it from here".

One of them must have noticed my slightly bemused "How the hell did you know I've been having trouble with my computer?" look, because he smiled and said...

"It's OK, we work for the heldesk. Col sent us"...



Hands out industrial strength spanging pans. Please form an orderly queue.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Fri 4 Sep 2009, 0:25, 8 replies)

Didn't see it coming
Nice one DG.
(Captain Placid 24/7 ball gags, brownie mix and clown porn, Fri 4 Sep 2009, 7:44, closed)

I didn't even see it leaving
Till I re-read the small print.
(Vice Admiral Sir Charles Cockbrush KCB MBE DSO, who is finding it increasingly difficult to log into b3ta.com wants to duck your aunt and kick your puppy, Fri 4 Sep 2009, 8:54, closed)

Likewise.
It's been a while.
(WillI'mNot logs in twice a year, every year, Fri 4 Sep 2009, 10:20, closed)

*chuckle*
That's a brilliant stroke of punnage genius sir..

Hook, line and sinker - all the way.
*clicks*
(danniekavanagh did nothing constructive on, Fri 4 Sep 2009, 10:21, closed)

Have a
well deserved *click*
( Funkenschlag still likes dogs more than cats, Fri 4 Sep 2009, 11:54, closed)

*procures the largest frying pan from the kitchen*
*SPANGS*
( Tourette's ( . )( . ) has a monkey hair in her fried egg, Fri 4 Sep 2009, 12:26, closed)

HAH!
I think this should win purely for the pun.

I didnt think it possible to spang that one in this weeks Q.

Well done sir.
( unsey a frizzy haired fruit since, Fri 4 Sep 2009, 13:46, closed)

One of the most
subtle ones I've seen. Nicely sir.
( shadyron, Sat 5 Sep 2009, 1:19, closed)