Only cyclists should be allowed to drive cars.
As a cyclist you have a much better appreciation of the dangers of driving, and definitely have better road awareness. The only people with the skills to use cars are bike riders. All current car drivers should be forced to sell their cars and spend 5 years getting around on pushbikes, until they have the necessary skills to graduate to motorised transport.
(Brigadier an old boot sitting on a man's face - forever, Mon 29 Apr 2013, 17:28, 45 replies)

I can sense vagabond preparing a swift rebuke

( rofl harris, Mon 29 Apr 2013, 17:30, closed)

He hates misuse of the word "defiantly"

( emvee cruor deo cruoris, Mon 29 Apr 2013, 17:32, closed)

oops

(Brigadier an old boot sitting on a man's face - forever, Mon 29 Apr 2013, 17:38, closed)

however, try cycling around London
Cyclists are the most dangerous on the road apart from commercial vehicles and massive fuck off lorries.

Fixie gears? Check
No working brakes? Check
No helmet? Check
Bike not serviced in last 10 years? Check
Massive fuck off Dre Dre headphones & Skillrex mix so I can't hear what's going on? Check
Two or three pints of beers consumed in the pub after work? check
( rofl harris, Mon 29 Apr 2013, 17:32, closed)

Whizz through red lights?
Dodge through the pedestrians on the zebra crossing?
Massive sense of entitlement?
Wrong way down one-way streets?
Indiscriminately switch between pavement and road?
Blame "bad drivers" for any transgressions you might commit?
( emvee cruor deo cruoris, Mon 29 Apr 2013, 17:36, closed)

Think I rowed about this on here before
Of your list of transgressions the one I do regularly is going through a red light - but only in the circumstance where I get to the front at a junction to find a massive lorry in the cycle box, and a solid metal railing to my left. Rather than risk getting my innards spread across the railings I'll jump the light.
( rofl harris, Mon 29 Apr 2013, 17:40, closed)

Oh yeah, I forgot
Blame "lorries" for any transgressions you might commit?
( emvee cruor deo cruoris, Mon 29 Apr 2013, 17:41, closed)

hahah
Nah, it's just that it's not just cyclists who forget the rules of the road - I've come to assume that not indicating has absolutely no reflection on whether a vehicle is actually going to turn (and conversely, indicating has no bearing on whether a vehicle will turn, or even if they do, in the direction that they're indicating in), and there's no guarantee that I've been seen...

It all comes down to "Do I want to die today?"
( rofl harris, Mon 29 Apr 2013, 17:44, closed)

As a weekend cyclist I do sympathise, really I do
but as a London pedestrian I've learned to loathe cyclists
( emvee cruor deo cruoris, Mon 29 Apr 2013, 17:50, closed)

Must be why as a London cyclist
I loathe all other cyclists
( rofl harris, Mon 29 Apr 2013, 17:51, closed)

It's the only sensible option, I think

( emvee cruor deo cruoris, Mon 29 Apr 2013, 17:53, closed)

Just because your bike does not have an engine...
... that does not mean you're exempt from the rules of the road. If you don't want to wait at the red light, then you must dismount the bike and walk it up onto the pavement past the light.
(EuroSong I love horse meat: best of all the animals, Tue 30 Apr 2013, 1:26, closed)

You must be fucking great company at parties.

( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Tue 30 Apr 2013, 8:03, closed)

I agree.
Either dismount and walk or stay behind the front vehicle so that it doesn't squash you when it turns. Just because you can fit past on the left doesn't mean you always have to or always should.
(Me, I'm not... in any way intoxicated, Tue 30 Apr 2013, 11:49, closed)

Or have accept that you're no more important than anyone else, have some fucking patience and obey the rules of the road.
I've never met a cyclist who thinks any of the above apply to them.
( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Tue 30 Apr 2013, 16:01, closed)

Got to admit...
I *love* clotheslining pavement cyclists, and the ones who run through pedestrian crossings on the red light.
(gordonjcp, Tue 30 Apr 2013, 0:01, closed)

Yup, me too.
Had more abuse on this site from admitting it than I have from the cyclists that have collided with me.

I know drivers are bad, cyclists are bad and even pedestrians jump out into the road without looking, and we've all seen examples of such. The key point is that there are far more pedestrians or cars than cyclists, but by far the higher percentage of transgressions appear to be by our two wheeled friends.
(Kliper Filllets Getting noticed by twats on the internet since, Tue 30 Apr 2013, 13:34, closed)

London cyclists make Italian drivers look like Mother Teresa.
Self-important, red light-jumping, pavement riding pricks the lot of them.
( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Tue 30 Apr 2013, 9:08, closed)

I get annoyed at car drivers for not indicating, they've usually had a quite check that nothings going to dent their shiny car before pulling out/over though.

But cyclists (vast overwhelming leming-like majority) dont.

As long as all they all carry donor cards and as long as, any cyclist getting squished, demonstrably due to their own lack of awareness/care, gets classed as suicide. I'm happy enough for them to continue.

Motorcyclists should also should carry organ donor cards(I do, they aint getting my eyes though!)

Looking forward to getting my 1000w ebike kit and the look in their eyes as I smoke past them up the hills without even pedaling.

I anticipate it will be a mixture puzzlement, loss and outrage.

smacks lips
(Lucker, Tue 30 Apr 2013, 9:09, closed)

as a london cyclist london pedestrian and london driver
all of the above can be bellends at times. including me.

cant we all just get along?
(magictorch, Tue 30 Apr 2013, 10:54, closed)

I have very rarely seen motorists jump red lights, and never seen any driving along on the pavement
and certainly not heard of any of them trying to justify doing so "Because I didn't want to go around the one-way system" as one told me the other day when I actively stopped him, the self-important twat.
( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Tue 30 Apr 2013, 11:07, closed)

When I ride to work I have an OH FUUUUCK moment when a driver drifts out of their lane, inadvertently forces me off the road etc, about twice a week.

I've never once felt at risk from a cyclist while I'm driving.
(Brigadier an old boot sitting on a man's face - forever, Tue 30 Apr 2013, 12:16, closed)

I, however, feel at risk from cyclists every time I cross a pedestrian crossing.
Particularly so if I am walking in front of a 'bus - several times I've had to suddenly check my step as they've whizzed out across the crossing, deliberately completely ignoring the red light they're meant to stop at.

A 6' 12st guy travelling at ~12-15mph is could do both of us significant damage.
( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Tue 30 Apr 2013, 13:06, closed)

Really, every time. Fuck, that sounds like stalking. I never feel at risk.

(Brigadier an old boot sitting on a man's face - forever, Tue 30 Apr 2013, 20:13, closed)

Central London, crossing pedestrian crossing in front of a 'bus or van
I am very, very wary because of their behaviour.
( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Wed 1 May 2013, 13:24, closed)

harden up, fucking pussy
(W3BOPLASTY, Wed 1 May 2013, 8:16, closed)

Terrible bullying here.

( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Wed 1 May 2013, 13:25, closed)

As a cyclist who gets annoyed at both inconsiderate car drivers AND other cyclists who do stupid and dangerous things,
I get to have EVERYONE think I'm a cunt.
( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Tue 30 Apr 2013, 11:05, closed)

Also, I agree with your post, cunt that I am.

( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Tue 30 Apr 2013, 11:05, closed)

I Witnessed...
..an old lady being knocked over and killed by a bike a long time ago. On a steep hill, she stepped out from behind a bus without looking. The poor sod on the bike never stood a chance a) because he was going too fast, b) he overtook when he shouldn't, c) the old lady just walked right out without looking. Lots of wrongs don't make anything right, but they make me very careful when cycling! The sight of her blood running down the hill stays with me, forty years on.
( The Lone Groover has mal des nuts., Tue 30 Apr 2013, 13:23, closed)

How fast is too fast, on a pushbike?

( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Tue 30 Apr 2013, 13:49, closed)

Roughly
299,792,458 m / s
( Cactus 1 doesn't care what you think on, Tue 30 Apr 2013, 14:09, closed)

15-25mph is still too fast to stop with fuck all notice.
We should all be pootling along at 3mph in case someone decides to throw themselves under the wheels.
( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Tue 30 Apr 2013, 14:12, closed)

Too fast to be in control, I should think.
Just like doing 30mph when the limit allows could still be considered dangerous driving if there was only a narrow gap between cars, children around and it was raining or icy.

I never go close and fast past a stationary object where I can't see if someone / something could suddenly be in my path, be it walking, cycling or driving.
(Kliper Filllets Getting noticed by twats on the internet since, Tue 30 Apr 2013, 15:58, closed)

Fastest I've Managed...
...is 47 mph. Downhill. On an open road. With no parked buses, thank you very much. The hill upon which the accident happened was much steeper than this one, too. Hit someone at that speed and you'll make a mess of them. And yourself, I should think.
( The Lone Groover has mal des nuts., Tue 30 Apr 2013, 17:01, closed)

I live next to a steep hill with a pelican crossing on it
I just adore the way that cyclists who've got a bit of speed up don't bother stopping at the red light and decide to weave their way through the crossing pedestrians as fast as they can go.

Mind you, if you lunge at them going "RAGHR!" as loud as you can they still fall off and hurt themselves, the daft cunts.
( emvee cruor deo cruoris, Tue 30 Apr 2013, 15:26, closed)

It's all about....
..responsible behaviour, and the way in which wheeled vehicle pilots assume that pedestrians can/will remove themselves from the danger that rapidly approaches. It's not about the car/bike thing, it's about arrogance, common sense and speed when it boils down to it.

Oh, and not being a tw@t!
( The Lone Groover has mal des nuts., Tue 30 Apr 2013, 17:06, closed)

I carry an air horn.
When the self-important twat on his bike wearing his expensive Lycra biking gear does something stupid like weave between moving cars or running a light, if I see him coming I give him a blast as he goes by. Chances are good he will wipe out.

Fun for the whole community!
( Wanderer, Tue 30 Apr 2013, 19:20, closed)

You don't though, do you?

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 30 Apr 2013, 20:49, closed)

Alternatively...
everyone should be made to drive an old banger with the bare minimum safety features, so they learn to drive really carefully, and only then can they get nice new cars with all mod cons. I have a personal theory that stupid drivers are taking more risks nowadays because modern cars are so safe and it gives them a false sense of confidence (this probably makes me sound like an old lady grumbling about new-fangled things).
(MC Toffeehammer, Wed 1 May 2013, 8:01, closed)

Damn straight, in the event of a collision cars should crush like they were made of cardboard.
That'll teach those Yummy Mummies busy updating facebook balanced on the steering wheel of their S-Maxes instead than watching the road, amirite?
( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Wed 1 May 2013, 9:09, closed)

Awesome post
Highest number of hits!
Easy equation:
Number of cyclists who have killed/ seriously hurt pedestrians, cyclists, car drivers, truck drivers etc.= fuck all
Number of car/truck-drivers who have killed/seriously hurt pedestrians, cyclists, car drivers, truck drivers etc. = Heaps Bro.

Generally the only person who is at risk when a cyclist is being a twat is the cyclist themselves.
When a driver of a larger heavier and faster vehicle is being a twat everyone is at risk.

So there
(W3BOPLASTY, Wed 1 May 2013, 8:13, closed)

Amusing, but hardly correct
Number of people killed by air rifles = fuck all
Number of people killed by guns = shed loads.

Therefore I can wave an air rifle around without worry.

The problem is that it's not just the cyclist that comes off worse. The first thing to hit a pedestrian is the bike itself, and the cyclist doesn't feel the full impact.

Also, I'd rather not run a cyclist down, even if it's not my fault. Would rather spoil my day, and probably my car as well.
(Kliper Filllets Getting noticed by twats on the internet since, Wed 1 May 2013, 9:03, closed)

Number of people shot by someone on a bicycle last year in Los Angeles = 14
Number of people shot by someone on foot last year in Los Angeles = 7,658

I just made that up.
( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Wed 1 May 2013, 9:10, closed)

Exactly
I don't think making up figures to justify something's a very good argument at the best of times.

Claiming those figures show that it doesn't happen often, and thus isn't important just compounds the issue.
(Kliper Filllets Getting noticed by twats on the internet since, Wed 1 May 2013, 11:36, closed)

Yeah. Opinion and prejudice trump statistics every time.

(Brigadier an old boot sitting on a man's face - forever, Wed 1 May 2013, 13:27, closed)

That's the opinion of 54% of the people.

(Kliper Filllets Getting noticed by twats on the internet since, Wed 1 May 2013, 15:45, closed)