A mate of mine once randomly notified us that...
"Cum tatses salty"

...and he's not even a bummer!
( mr.dogshit The world's premier anthropomorphic canine faeces, Thu 12 May 2011, 16:41, 20 replies)

A friend of mine has said that too.
When asked how he knew, he said something about tears and blood and sweat all being salty, so spunk must be too.
(FartThroughAWalkieTalkie wished you were dead in ditch on, Thu 12 May 2011, 16:46, closed)

He has clearly eaten a post wank snack without washing his hands.

(Bushcricket, Thu 12 May 2011, 16:52, closed)

Or lost at a game of "soggy biscuit"

( brown-wings Made with three kinds of butter, Thu 12 May 2011, 17:02, closed)

Ah, the joys of a private education!

( shinyshinyscalp less a man, more a way of life, Thu 12 May 2011, 17:23, closed)

For some reason
I have only recently heard of this spectacular game.
( clockworkrat has nice pants, Thu 12 May 2011, 23:34, closed)

Perhaps he accidentally gave himself a facial?
I know I've come pretty close a good many times.
(Me, I'm not... in any way intoxicated, Thu 12 May 2011, 17:18, closed)

Well done for keeping at it and not giving up, after all,
If at first you don't suck seed...try, try, try again...
(Bushcricket, Thu 12 May 2011, 17:31, closed)

If I wanted to I could have.
I've hit the headboard as a teenager, and managed to hit the wall fairly recently. But giving myself a facial never appealed.
(Me, I'm not... in any way intoxicated, Thu 12 May 2011, 20:21, closed)

mine tastes of bacon

( rofl harris, Thu 12 May 2011, 17:31, closed)

In that
case. I think I'm gonna get myself a case of the bumders.
(dchurch bah, Thu 12 May 2011, 17:58, closed)

I've heard (yeah, no first hand! knowledge at all...)
that what you eat affects the flavour e.g. pineapple's good - if you like pineapple. Anyone confirm, and have an idea how long it takes to, you know, work it's way through?
(sarcastic fringehead feet of clay, buns of steel, head of lettuce, Thu 12 May 2011, 20:33, closed)

I drank two litres of pineapple juice in one go.
She said it didn't improve the taste at all.
( flake has nothing against your right leg, Fri 13 May 2011, 1:50, closed)

Shame, the bromelain in pineapple acts as an exfoliant,
so you can tell the facial recipient they're getting a double benefit.
(sarcastic fringehead feet of clay, buns of steel, head of lettuce, Fri 13 May 2011, 10:01, closed)

Avoid asparagus - that stuff is evil.
(Freakmandu, Fri 13 May 2011, 4:01, closed)

Either
He isn't petrified of being thought of as not the straightest man on the block, or, you know, he has talked to people who do suck cock.
( clockworkrat has nice pants, Thu 12 May 2011, 23:36, closed)

Don't have to be a bummer to know that.
Any man who claims that he doesn't know what semen tastes like is lying.

Every man, without exception, has almost broken his own neck trying auto-fellatio. Some have suck-seeded. Most haven't. But they've all tasted the fruits of their endeavours.
( flake has nothing against your right leg, Fri 13 May 2011, 1:52, closed)

Nonsense - I had this conversation with a bummist only the other day - he opined the exact same thing
I have never tasted my own spunk, and have absolutely no interest in doing so. Likewise I have never eaten my bogies. No interest.

So that's absolute nonsense and you're a nonsense, you nonsense.

Good pun on "suck-seeded" by the way.
( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Fri 13 May 2011, 8:46, closed)

Thank you. I'm here all week. (The puns don't improve, though.)
( flake has nothing against your right leg, Fri 13 May 2011, 9:18, closed)

*Ahem*
cheater.
(Bushcricket, Fri 13 May 2011, 11:12, closed)

Surely a better response would have been
"A girlfriend/ex/girl-I-once-pulled told me"
( SauronWibble I'll hold it, you lick it..., Fri 13 May 2011, 14:24, closed)