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This is a question Dates Gone Wrong

Ever gone on a date when "she" turned out to be a male university lecturer in his 50s who tucked his shirt into his Y-fronts? No, me neither. Tell us how it all went shit-faced.

(I helped save b3ta! Scaryduck LIKES EGG, Thu 4 Sep 2014, 13:13)
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Met this girl on Monday, I took her for a drink on Tuesday,
we were making love by Wednesday,
and on Thursday,
I found out
she was underage.
Was jailed on Sunday.
(I helped save b3ta! drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Tue 9 Sep 2014, 23:35, 36 replies)
Basically, what I'm saying here is that Craig David fucks kids and then writes songs about it.

(I helped save b3ta! drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Tue 9 Sep 2014, 23:36, closed)
Craig 'H From Steps' David.

(I helped save b3ta! drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Tue 9 Sep 2014, 23:37, closed)
He was also
Born to do I.T.

Which is helpful as that's the only way he can earn a living these days.

"Craig David all over your *windows error noise*"
(RebelWithoutApplause My underestimation will almost be the death of me, Wed 10 Sep 2014, 11:32, closed)
Unless you are a paki
In which case the government gives you free money and leaflets on how to rape white girls with impunity.

This is not what my grandad didn't die in the war for.
(Baggenfrock get fucked, Wed 10 Sep 2014, 0:05, closed)
Are you too dumb to dumb down?
Or is this you trying to conceal your true thoughts beneath a shredded tarpaulin of irony?

Either way you're looking a bit of a cunt.
(zebideedoodah likes florence but prefers venice, Wed 10 Sep 2014, 1:29, closed)

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hipster_racism
(I helped save b3ta! drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Wed 10 Sep 2014, 1:40, closed)
Who gives a fuck
you self righteous cunt
(Baggenfrock get fucked, Wed 10 Sep 2014, 8:35, closed)
You fucking tit.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Wed 10 Sep 2014, 10:36, closed)
comedy racism is edgy and hilarious
/ac
(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Wed 10 Sep 2014, 2:21, closed)
I take it all back. It turns out that the fat racist loser that this sock puppet belongs to isn't Fathelme it's HIM.

(I helped save b3ta! Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Wed 10 Sep 2014, 8:27, closed)
it does have the same unfortunate combination of witless bravado and massive insecurity
sad times
(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Wed 10 Sep 2014, 8:31, closed)
I AM HIM

(Baggenfrock get fucked, Wed 10 Sep 2014, 8:41, closed)
Why don't you fuck off to mumsnet
you tragic old prick
(Baggenfrock get fucked, Wed 10 Sep 2014, 8:37, closed)
awww ... weepy is weeping again

(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Wed 10 Sep 2014, 8:39, closed)
a little bit upset
this morning?
(Baggenfrock get fucked, Wed 10 Sep 2014, 8:41, closed)
Nice angry, rebarbative hijacking
Of this thread.

"Who will buy my angry eggs?" sang the Greengrocer as he smashed another dozen into my face...

Know that despite your grumpy, spiky behaviour I still love you with all my hate.
(RebelWithoutApplause My underestimation will almost be the death of me, Wed 10 Sep 2014, 11:30, closed)
Greengrocers don't sell eggs
you massive fucking spastic

I hope you get blown up on the tube
(Baggenfrock get fucked, Wed 10 Sep 2014, 11:41, closed)
They are not barred from selling eggs.

(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! d.r._and_quinch when will you be famous?, Wed 10 Sep 2014, 11:50, closed)
The greengrocer round the corner sells eggs.
And bread.

It's eurocrat political correctness gone mad
(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Wed 10 Sep 2014, 11:53, closed)

HE'S NOT A FUCKING GREENGROCER THEN IS HE!!


ARRHHHHHHH!!!!!
(Baggenfrock get fucked, Wed 10 Sep 2014, 11:55, closed)
She is a greengrocer.
I realise you live in the soppy ITV version of the 1950s but here in the 21st century there is a wee bit more flexibility.
(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Wed 10 Sep 2014, 11:58, closed)
Don't know what your talking about grandad, I was born in the 80s.

(Baggenfrock get fucked, Wed 10 Sep 2014, 12:00, closed)
"you're"

(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Wed 10 Sep 2014, 12:01, closed)
FUCK
OFF
AND
DIE
(Baggenfrock get fucked, Wed 10 Sep 2014, 12:02, closed)
easy fella ... it's not my fault you have a shit life ... direct your anger somewhere more constructive
perhaps work a bit harder so you don't have live in a backwards village full of surveyors
(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Wed 10 Sep 2014, 12:04, closed)
**Licks your tears**
Mmmm, tastes like victory.
(RebelWithoutApplause My underestimation will almost be the death of me, Wed 10 Sep 2014, 12:05, closed)
They taste like rotten fish and alcohol to me

(Baggenfrock get fucked, Wed 10 Sep 2014, 12:14, closed)
That is exactly what victory tastes like.

(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! d.r._and_quinch when will you be famous?, Wed 10 Sep 2014, 12:41, closed)
I like the way
You constantly miss the point.
(RebelWithoutApplause My underestimation will almost be the death of me, Wed 10 Sep 2014, 12:05, closed)
Sorry Paxman
I'll try and pay more attention to retarded banter on a comedy website in the future.
(Baggenfrock get fucked, Wed 10 Sep 2014, 12:08, closed)
Yeahhh
Keep going... Mmmm... Yeah... Prove my point harder! Come on you slag I'm nearly there...
(RebelWithoutApplause My underestimation will almost be the death of me, Wed 10 Sep 2014, 12:13, closed)
"I hope you get blown up on the tube"
Is that your indirect & euphemistic way of saying you wanna chuck your mayonnaise up my servants entrance?
(RebelWithoutApplause My underestimation will almost be the death of me, Wed 10 Sep 2014, 14:23, closed)
In your dreams
I meant I hope you bleed to death from horrific injuries sustained as a result of shrapnel from the explosion caused by a Jihadist suicide bomber on a London Underground train.
(Baggenfrock get fucked, Wed 10 Sep 2014, 14:40, closed)
I like the way
You repeat yourself.

I hope that too by the way. And hey, if that does happen, at least I won't die alone.
(RebelWithoutApplause My underestimation will almost be the death of me, Thu 11 Sep 2014, 9:41, closed)
You're not doing it right.

(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! d.r._and_quinch when will you be famous?, Wed 10 Sep 2014, 7:10, closed)

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