How about replacing alcohol with cannabis?
Make alcohol illegal, alcoholics can get it in small doses on prescription from their doctor - foul-tasting, mass produced vodka or something.

Pubs turned into 'coffe shops' with state licenced cannabis available. Produced in state run greenhouses and taxed at a sensible rate to make it affordable for all. But not for under 18s of course. They will have to fake i.d.s or get someone to buy it for them.

We'll be able to cut down on policing the streets at weekends by about 300% and hospitals will only need a skeleton staff through the nights.

EDIT: As I said, replace alcohol with cannabis, so, instead of hippies growing their own in the back garden, dippies (TM) will brew their own beer in the shed and the rozzers will leave them alone as long as they don't turn into Al Capone, with illegal stills selling for profits. Inevitable and harmless.

And I take the point - not state grown, but state taxed. Farmers will be able to do it much better. They shouldn't have trouble finding casual labour either.
(Che Grimsdale Best before:, Tue 27 Sep 2011, 11:15, 11 replies)

Nah.
Smoking dries your mouth out, and besides, a few bevvies with a couple of mates is much better than just monging in a room playing X-Box and eating doritos until you're 20 stone.
( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Tue 27 Sep 2011, 11:17, closed)

Agreed.
Although you will to take action on the coming Mars Bar shortage.
(The Luggage is haunted..., Tue 27 Sep 2011, 11:19, closed)

Sorry, but...
I really enjoy a nice pint.

Plus, as I tend to stick to stuff under 4.0%ABV, and rarely more than seven or eight of those, I'm not exactly causing a drain on our police or ambulance services.
(greatoldone Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl f'tagn, Tue 27 Sep 2011, 11:31, closed)

Domino's Pizza would have larger cash reserves than China.

( Ring Of Fire A petty, drooling belming butthurt retard., Tue 27 Sep 2011, 11:41, closed)

They already do.
See thingsdominosareworthmorethan.tumblr.com/
(Falstaff's Spiritual Successor, Tue 27 Sep 2011, 12:07, closed)

That's several times now that someone has called for "state-run" cannabis operations.
Surely it would be better (and a lot less sinister) as private business? You wouldn't drink 'state-brewed' beer, why the fuck would you smoke 'state-grown' cannabis?
( Wet-chinned bag shanker Cannot parse Wogan, Tue 27 Sep 2011, 12:08, closed)

State licensed and taxed, is what was said.
You know, in much the same way that you seem to think beer isn't.
(Falstaff's Spiritual Successor, Tue 27 Sep 2011, 12:22, closed)

"Produced in state run greenhouses"

( Wet-chinned bag shanker Cannot parse Wogan, Tue 27 Sep 2011, 12:25, closed)

but i like alcohol and it likes me.
whereas cannabis makes me paranoid and fighty. how are you going to legislate for that, eh?
( janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Tue 27 Sep 2011, 12:21, closed)

Legalise smack as well.
Instant calm, administered straight into your forearm by your friendly neighbourhood bobby. No whiteys here ma'am.
( Wet-chinned bag shanker Cannot parse Wogan, Tue 27 Sep 2011, 12:32, closed)

well then, sign me up!

( janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Tue 27 Sep 2011, 12:51, closed)

Fucking racist.

( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Tue 27 Sep 2011, 13:34, closed)

BTW
I've not had a smoke since c1995. Anyone know where I can get some in York? Gaz me.
(Che Grimsdale Best before:, Tue 27 Sep 2011, 12:49, closed)

I've got a bag of stuff you can have. Let's say £50 quid for the lot. It's a new strain, the kids are calling it 'Schwartz'. I guarantee it will be unlike anything you've smoked before.
I've also got a lump of organically produced solids you can have for £30. It's known as 'rabbit'. Good grassy smoke.
( Wet-chinned bag shanker Cannot parse Wogan, Tue 27 Sep 2011, 12:59, closed)

Sounds like good shit
I'll be right round with the readies.
(Che Grimsdale Best before:, Tue 27 Sep 2011, 13:03, closed)