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This is a question Turning into your parents

Unable to hold back the genetic tide, I find myself gardening in my carpet slippers, asking for a knife and fork in McDonalds and agreeing with the Daily Telegraph. I'm beyond help - what about you?

Thanks to b3th for the suggestion

(, Thu 30 Apr 2009, 13:39)
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This is my little boy :)

The reality of my situation didn't really hit me until I'd had the scan.

Now, whenever I feel him move my hand automatically goes to my stomach and I think "awwwwwwwwwwww"
My reaction is the same when I see baby clothes.
I've also taken up knitting. It's actually very theraputic.
I now collect 50p coins and keep them in a box, another £3 and i'll open a savings account for him.
I wear leggings because jeans are uncomfy.
I have a strange desire to expand on my knitting and start doing cross stitch and crochet again.

In short, pregnancy is turning me into my grandmother. I'm one step away from being exactly like her. I've warned my man to let me know if he ever hears me speaking german to my womb :s

Length? About the same as a bar of chocolate apparently :o
(, Sun 3 May 2009, 11:27, closed)
*feels mushy*

Want a baby scarf???
*knits you a baby scarf anyway*
(, Sun 3 May 2009, 12:25, closed)
Is that a scarf made from babies?
I do hope so.
(, Sun 3 May 2009, 12:36, closed)
more importantly - it's from *our* babies enzyme.
(, Sun 3 May 2009, 12:53, closed)
Our babies?
I didn't think I'd even met you!
(, Sun 3 May 2009, 13:04, closed)
you didn't need to
you got me pregnant via people osmosis. too many straight women over there - your spluff travelled overseas and entered me like the miracle of god into mary.
or some such.
(, Sun 3 May 2009, 13:06, closed)
Ahhh. That makes perfect sense.
I knew I shouldn't have wanked into that randomly-addressed envelope.
(, Sun 3 May 2009, 13:09, closed)
too darn right you shouldn't have
giving birth to eight children was hideous - I grew deformed. May have to start asking for government support now!

And my poor poor womb will never be the same ever again. :(
(, Sun 3 May 2009, 13:11, closed)
You have to take the blame for some of that.
Next time jizz-soaked stationery arrives through your letterbox, perhaps rubbing it around your twat shouldn't be your first response.

And I can't help it if my pheromones make me utterly irresistible.
(, Sun 3 May 2009, 13:19, closed)
oh god
it was far too late for a bed lol but you get one anyway.

And I couldn't help it! I hadn't had any action for that long - it was the closest thing I could get to real sex. See - even jizz from a man was satisfying!
(, Sun 3 May 2009, 13:27, closed)
I assume you've seen "Alien"?
It's just that the picture on the right... um...
(, Sun 3 May 2009, 12:37, closed)
strangely enough
the first thing i said when i first saw him was "oh my god he looks like an alien"

the midwife wasn't pleased...
(, Sun 3 May 2009, 12:39, closed)
In all fairness...
Noone looks like a proper human until they're well into their first year out of the womb.

It's a dirty little secret that noone admits, but babies are ugly. Their faces are still too big for them, like a jumper bought as a Christmas present by an enthusiastic spinster aunt.
(, Sun 3 May 2009, 12:51, closed)
don't forget you'll get
child trust fund too of £250
p.s. sign up for the health in pregnancy grant. (£190 cash in hand)
(, Sun 3 May 2009, 20:05, closed)
Cash in
And Child tax credits donít wait 6 months expecting to get them any day now as they only back date 3 months. Youíre contributing to the debt of the future, so you may as well make it big. Oh and you still feel the same after a 3am feed, however you feel you are dreaming and you were not up at that time. Having a baby is an enjoyable journey thru hell, good luck. Oh and a dummy is the greatest invention next to the wheel.
(, Sun 3 May 2009, 20:50, closed)
sounds good
unfortunately i'm too young to apply for tax credits :(
(, Mon 4 May 2009, 0:28, closed)

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