HecklesForget the drunk bloke at the back yelling incoherent nonsense. Sometimes a well placed heckle can raise a mediocre act to a brilliant night out.
Tell us your best heckles and, if you are brave, the retorts that put you back in your place like the maggot you are.
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chthonic, Thu 6 Apr 2006, 13:13)
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Not a heckle... more a gestureLet me paint a picture into your mind (bear with me, it's going somewhere). I'm overweight. Now I'm not obese but overweight. Unfortunately all the weight is on my belly so I look about six months pregnant.
Anyway, I'm walking down the road eating a kebab when some girlies (those horrid 18 year olds who think they are funny) walked past and shouted, "Oi, giz a chip?"
I looked at them and said, "It's not a bag of chips, it's a kebab."
"Fat bastard," came the reply.
As they walked down the road I carefully placed my kebab on the floor, lifted up my shirt and shouted, "Oi". As they turned around I proceeded to wiggle my extra couple of stone of gut fat in their direction. They ran off, possibly crying.
Needless to say, any remains of heterosexuality in their minds was ripped out and vomited on the floor.
(, Tue 11 Apr 2006, 18:09, Reply)
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