a little while ago i hadn't gotten around to renewing my oyster card, so i was in the queue to top it up
there were 2 machines, and i wasn't sure if the 2 people in front of me were together or not. i leaned forward to ask, at which point the man behind me sighed loudly and barged past me to use one of the machines. i was furious enough to break the code of the tube, and spoke out loud.

"what do you think you're doing? there's a queue."

"you were taking too long," he shrugged.

"I WAS BEING POLITE. SOMETHING YOU COULD DO WITH," i seethed, and went to use the other machine as it had come free. 1 minute later, i had finished. to my glee, the twat was still struggling to complete his transaction.

"now that's taking too long," i said sweetly, and left him stewing and still struggling to shove his manky coins into the machine. the words "fuck" and "off" may have followed me down the stairs to the platform, but that was one more fuck than i gave.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 1 Apr 2015, 14:11, 17 replies)

Londoners are a ratty bunch in need of good manners and chilling out, I recall how irritable people were on public transport while I lived there
Clicked for being well-written
(Porcupine, Wed 1 Apr 2015, 15:00, closed)

good manners and chilling out, I recall how irritable people were on public transport while I lived there
Clicked for being well-written exterminating
( 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Wed 1 Apr 2015, 17:38, closed)

you are so cool, a role model to us all

( The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Wed 1 Apr 2015, 15:49, closed)

i'm going to take this totes at face value

( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 1 Apr 2015, 16:03, closed)

The only reason I'm not going to give you a click
is out of concern that winning QOTW would inflate your ego to the point of bursting.
(the other guy not the one that gave you coochie warts, Wed 1 Apr 2015, 16:55, closed)

we all know you clicked AND masturbated

( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 1 Apr 2015, 18:58, closed)

What else do you think this website is for?

(McChinaman banned, Thu 2 Apr 2015, 9:35, closed)

Needless to say, you had the last laugh.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Wed 1 Apr 2015, 16:07, closed)

just like everyone who sees your face

( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 1 Apr 2015, 16:08, closed)

You can't even get queuing right.

( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Wed 1 Apr 2015, 16:45, closed)

And people wonder why London commuters are irritable

( emvee cruor deo cruoris, Wed 1 Apr 2015, 17:24, closed)

the story is: you were upset.

( d.r._and_quinch when will you be famous?, Wed 1 Apr 2015, 18:20, closed)

it's not really a story
more of a weak anecdote. but at least it isn't just posting someone else's weak anecdote.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 1 Apr 2015, 18:59, closed)

What else do you think this website is for?

(McChinaman banned, Thu 2 Apr 2015, 9:35, closed)

Use auto top-up and you won't have to worry about this sort of thing.

( idonthaveafunnynickname Drink-Aware? Sure. I'm aware I want another drink., Wed 1 Apr 2015, 18:21, closed)

oh god, don't get me started - my fucking oyster card says "it's already registered" when it isn't, it gives me teh droop just trying to deal with it, so i always give up
most of the time i have a 12 month travel card from work so i just sail through getting really annoyed with the chumps who think you have to wait for the gates to close before you can touch your oyster card to the reader - THIS IS NOT TRUE AND IT COSTS THE PEOPLE BEHIND YOU AT LEAST 3 SECONDS OF THEIR LIFE.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 1 Apr 2015, 18:57, closed)

DALESTEAKS FOR TEA!

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Thu 2 Apr 2015, 9:19, closed)