Lurid Work Stories"I know a railwayman of 40-odd years' service," says Juan Quar, "and he tells me a new gruesome yarn each time we meet. Last week's was of checking the time on the wristwatch of a severed arm he'd just collected after a track fatality."
Tell us the horrible stories you tease the new hires with, or that you've been told.
NB By definition, these are probably all made up. Roll with it
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chthonic, Thu 5 Sep 2013, 17:33)
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If the pubs one male allocated toilet has been brokenand this leads to some dirty fucker shitting into the urinal, do not attempt to clear the resulting blockage using a jet wash. The pressure and close proximity to the shit will cause this to fountain back, covering you from head to toe in watered down effluent.
I'm glad I had delegated that particular job.
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Muns, Mon 9 Sep 2013, 16:34,
9 replies)
A teaspoon is best.And remember, kids: with enough salt and pepper, ANYTHING is edible.
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drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Mon 9 Sep 2013, 16:42,
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Ewwwwwww...O_o
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skullfunkerry In case of implosion do not look into implosion, Mon 9 Sep 2013, 17:00,
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Do not know which is worse, the pub having a broken toilet or the person shitting in the urinal.I think the public house should have either been shut or let the men use the female toilets. I admire the so-called "dirty fucker", although the sink would have been a better option. No doubt though your grotty toiletless pub did not have a sink.
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d.r._and_quinch when will you be famous?, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 15:53,
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I made the same argument. Unfortunately the brewery wouldn't let us shut the place down, with it being in Nottingham city centre and during the festive period. They also claimed that they wouldn't get anyone to repair it until after Christmas and they wouldn't just let us get a new bog and install it ourselves. The building being fifteenth century (I may have just given away which pub it is.) meant the layout didn't quite lend itself to alternative provisions for customers. At least they had two seperate trays for people to piss in. One just became an impromptu place for people to poo in for a bit.
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Muns, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 16:26,
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Jesus that is grimIt wouldn't be Ye Olde Trip to Jeruselem would it?
(, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 16:44, closed)
I'll see you in the Sal then, yeah?(
BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 19:58,
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I'd like to see a video of that.(, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 22:51, closed)
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