Hey Psychochomp, you're a dapper, well-dressed man-about-town.
Do you, or any of the other lads here, have a rough idea of how much taking in a coat can cost? Google is vague on the subject of taking in the back/sides and the tailors I've spoken to won't quote until I bring the coat in.

It's a full length Crombie and I'm fucked if I'm carting it in a bag around Uxbridge. It's not theft I'm afraid of, the residents here wouldn't know a Crombie if it bit them, but it's a touch on the heavy side.

Coat length, arms and shoulders are fine, but the main body is laughably oversized.
( Kroney, Mon 7 Feb 2011, 12:41, 5 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

find a wrinkled easten european woman to do it
better than a tailor and cheaper.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 7 Feb 2011, 12:42, Reply)

I was hoping you might reply
given that you've been known to wear decent clothes on occasion. Unfortunately I don't know of any Eastern European women poor enough to live in Uxbridge.
( Kroney, Mon 7 Feb 2011, 12:47, Reply)

I need to find myself a tailor as well, so this is at the forefront of my mind
fortunately one of my mates has found a wizened Polish woman to do the job very cheap, and he has already had an expensive suit worked on by her, so he knows she can do the business.

Not sure how you go about finding one in Uxbridge, but I stand by my advice.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 7 Feb 2011, 12:49, Reply)

It's a pity.
Exeter is hardly handy for me.
( Kroney, Mon 7 Feb 2011, 12:55, Reply)

But it does have an 'X' in, same as Uxbridge
which presumably makes it feel more homelike to Eastern Europeans. Probably needs more 'Z's though.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Mon 7 Feb 2011, 13:24, Reply)

the subject heading here is hilarious
even better than your rapping on the other thread. you're on fire today.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 7 Feb 2011, 12:42, Reply)

Easiest to just repossition the buttons which you can do yourself.

(PsychoChomp, Mon 7 Feb 2011, 12:43, Reply)

To put it into context
I've a 42" chest, so 44" with suit etc. This thing was my grandad's and it absolutely hangs off me. If I reposition the buttons, I'll be able to wrap the twat around me twice. I need a section taking out.
( Kroney, Mon 7 Feb 2011, 12:46, Reply)

eat your way up to a 44" chest
job done
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 7 Feb 2011, 12:49, Reply)

Judging by the size of the coat
Grandpa had a good 50" in his chest. I knew he was a big man, but Christ.

You know as well as anybody that I'm hardly small. This thing *hangs* off me. It's embarrassing.
( Kroney, Mon 7 Feb 2011, 12:52, Reply)

yeah but when i used to see you marauding around uxbridge
there were no comparables. you should take a picture of yourself wearing it next to a statue of a bear or something so that we can all compare it.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 7 Feb 2011, 12:55, Reply)

I might have to take it to that weird bloke on Windsor Street
The foreign bloke. If I'm lucky, he might even be Polish.

It's about the only coat I have that's presentable enough to be worn over a DJ.
( Kroney, Mon 7 Feb 2011, 12:59, Reply)

i miss martin's cafe
and his slabs of lasagne that took a month to digest.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 7 Feb 2011, 13:01, Reply)

Still never been in there
It looks like a twee coffee shop and smells like Arabs.
( Kroney, Mon 7 Feb 2011, 13:02, Reply)

the food is awesome
poor old martin, his profits plunged when i left uxbridge and all my friends stopped going, we were in there at least twice a week. the other place i loved was pop-i-andys in the pavilions... unbelievably cheap amazing greek food.

mmm, vege moussaka, feta cheese salad and chips for a fiver.....

i have a 250 calorie marks and sparks salad for lunch today. it is NOT THE SAME.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 7 Feb 2011, 13:06, Reply)

You joke
but since you moved, I've not seen more than three people in there on any given lunchtime.
( Kroney, Mon 7 Feb 2011, 13:10, Reply)

Is it the Simply Fuller Longer Italian style one?
Because that is delicious.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 7 Feb 2011, 13:11, Reply)

no! not seen that
this is a "super wholefoods" small box thing, it's got edame beans and lentils and stuff in it.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 7 Feb 2011, 13:13, Reply)

Edamame beans and lentils are amazing
the Simply Fuller Longer has pasta, beans, rocket, sundried tomato, pepper (as in the veg), cheese and mozzarella. And a pot of dressing for the side.

255 CALORIES MOTHER FUCKING YES
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 7 Feb 2011, 13:16, Reply)

£20

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 7 Feb 2011, 13:00, Reply)

Is that all?
Oh well, then. Thanks very much.
( Kroney, Mon 7 Feb 2011, 13:02, Reply)

Drop it round later OK?

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 7 Feb 2011, 13:16, Reply)

Are you already sharpening your secateurs?
Or are you the old fashioned garden shears kind of man?
( Kroney, Mon 7 Feb 2011, 13:18, Reply)

I was planning on using fire.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 7 Feb 2011, 13:20, Reply)

Why would you carry a coat in a bag when you've got a perfectly good torso to carry it around on?

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Mon 7 Feb 2011, 13:11, Reply)

Because when I wear it, it looks like a wonderfully made woollen tent
and I'm terribly, terribly vain.
( Kroney, Mon 7 Feb 2011, 13:15, Reply)