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( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Sat 19 Feb 2011, 17:11, 36 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

The mods don't have any love for /ot

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Sat 19 Feb 2011, 17:51, Reply)

We're the spasticated cousin under the stairs and no mistaking it.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Sat 19 Feb 2011, 18:02, Reply)

By rob's own admission he often forgets that this place exists.

( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Sat 19 Feb 2011, 18:06, Reply)

If only feedingtimeatthezoo was here

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Sat 19 Feb 2011, 18:10, Reply)

He'd know what to do to inspire us all into a frothing frenzy of activity.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Sat 19 Feb 2011, 18:13, Reply)

h t
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Sat 19 Feb 2011, 18:17, Reply)

*rubs*
How was your gig?
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Sat 19 Feb 2011, 18:19, Reply)

It was very good.
They sounded excellent, although seeing anything was difficult as the place was rammed with people who appeared to be descended from giants.

The judicious use of dry ice didn't help, either.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Sat 19 Feb 2011, 18:21, Reply)

I envisaged the crowd as a sea of black topped with flowing grey-crested waves.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Sat 19 Feb 2011, 18:24, Reply)

There were a fair few ageing goths there, it's true.
But a fair number of younger ones all doing their best to look pissed off and miserable.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Sat 19 Feb 2011, 18:25, Reply)

I have had a fucking brilliant day with my Keith Moon in waiting

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Sat 19 Feb 2011, 19:21, Reply)

Happy kid!
Nice work. Get her some egg shakers and a tambourine next.
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Sat 19 Feb 2011, 19:30, Reply)

She's got drums,
harmonica, recorder, keyboard, a little guitar, maraccas, tambourine...

Knowing my luck she'll probably end up being an accountant. Mind you I could use a financial advisor.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Sat 19 Feb 2011, 19:40, Reply)

Or a one-woman band.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Sat 19 Feb 2011, 19:55, Reply)

This chap is my hero.
I see him all the time.
www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gs3ou7a_vPA
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Sat 19 Feb 2011, 20:09, Reply)

Minus the life expectancy bit, hopefully...

( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Sat 19 Feb 2011, 19:36, Reply)

I've already got her on the 'uppers and downers'.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Sat 19 Feb 2011, 19:41, Reply)

You decided against Oxfording tonight, then?

( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Sat 19 Feb 2011, 19:43, Reply)

My best friends the National Westminster Bank
made my decision for me.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Sat 19 Feb 2011, 19:45, Reply)

Probably sensible.
I just consulted my bank balance earlier... fuck. I didn't anticipate spending so much at the gig on Thursday night.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Sat 19 Feb 2011, 19:47, Reply)

Would you mind awfully if we change the subject please?

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Sat 19 Feb 2011, 19:49, Reply)

Not at all.
So yeah, they're making a new series of Red Dwarf, I hear...
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Sat 19 Feb 2011, 19:53, Reply)

Why would you anger it?

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Sat 19 Feb 2011, 19:56, Reply)

Shits and giggles, mostly.
Also, Monty knows I don't really mean it.

I think.

Thank you for what you did for the missus btw.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Sat 19 Feb 2011, 19:57, Reply)

It's a pleasure, hope it raised a smile.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Sat 19 Feb 2011, 20:42, Reply)

It did.
And a tear.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Sat 19 Feb 2011, 20:44, Reply)

I know, I wrote the script.
An exclusive preview:

'Smegging smeg off you smegger'

*smokes crack, does rape*

'Smeg'
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Sat 19 Feb 2011, 19:57, Reply)

*Something about "you smeg head"

( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Sat 19 Feb 2011, 19:58, Reply)

'I've done another smegging coke-rape.
What the smeg am I going to do?'
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Sat 19 Feb 2011, 20:01, Reply)

Get a job on Coronation Street playing a northerner what's a darkie, innit?

( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Sat 19 Feb 2011, 20:01, Reply)

Or
return to the 'brilliant' 'street poetry' that he was first on television doing on Saturday Live in the 80s with Ben 'integrity' Elton...
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Sat 19 Feb 2011, 20:03, Reply)

Everyone: 'LOL'

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Sat 19 Feb 2011, 20:02, Reply)

Apart from in series 7 when they didn't record it in front of a live audience.

( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Sat 19 Feb 2011, 20:03, Reply)

...because
the BBC feared for the safety of any female audience members.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Sat 19 Feb 2011, 20:04, Reply)

His smeg is probably worth £75 a gram.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Sat 19 Feb 2011, 20:05, Reply)

Ironically, his fridge is worth fuck all.

( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Sat 19 Feb 2011, 20:06, Reply)