i am high-maintenance and have a very definite taste for the finer things in life
but i buck the trend by paying for it myself and not expecting some man to do it whilst i loll around having fake tans and fake nails and fake boobs and fake hair and fucking the gardener
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 2 Mar 2011, 12:48, 3 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

you don't have a taste for the finer things in life
because at least half of them are made of meat
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 2 Mar 2011, 12:49, Reply)

I'd go with two thirds.
With at least 40% of that fraction comprising bacon and products containing bacon.
(Bazongaloid, Wed 2 Mar 2011, 12:51, Reply)

GET FAKE BOOBS
That would be fucking brilliant, you'd look like you were providing a chest-based sanctuary for abused spacehoppers
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 2 Mar 2011, 12:51, Reply)

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 2 Mar 2011, 13:10, Reply)

I like the way he has his name on his hat in case he losses it, I wonder if his mum stitched it in for him before he started school.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Wed 2 Mar 2011, 13:28, Reply)

She also modelled for the fake tits probably.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 2 Mar 2011, 13:34, Reply)

get real
how many gardeners are actually that attractive?
( Lisette von Falcon, Wed 2 Mar 2011, 13:18, Reply)