You're going to see Brian Blessed? Smart.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 7 Mar 2011, 8:40, 1 reply, 15 years ago)

So Monty, why no sleep?

(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Mon 7 Mar 2011, 8:46, Reply)

Massive drugs obviously

(Bazongaloid, Mon 7 Mar 2011, 8:49, Reply)

Morning Al.
What do you reckon to this then? bit.ly/hMdzxR
(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Mon 7 Mar 2011, 8:51, Reply)

I think he's right.
Having spent Saturday night in the company of a woman struggling to get a small business going, and hearing how the bank refused to lend her £150 - for 24hrs whilst confirmed Paypal transactions cleared - I know how stingy the banks are.

However, Cameron is a full-of-shit cunt.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 7 Mar 2011, 8:54, Reply)

Isn't it terrible that all those people you meet in the pub are such Grade A entrepreneurs
and the banks are so stingy. It's the same thing when you get into a cab, that man shouldn't be driving a cab, he should be running the country.
(Bazongaloid, Mon 7 Mar 2011, 8:58, Reply)

Everyone in my pub wants to be in charge of immigration policy.

(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Mon 7 Mar 2011, 9:01, Reply)

Someone needs to be, someone not in the last government.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 7 Mar 2011, 9:13, Reply)

Given that they don't know the difference between immigrants and asylum seekers
I wouldn't give any of them the job.
(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Mon 7 Mar 2011, 9:16, Reply)

Neither does Monty
that's why he just posted what he did.
(Bazongaloid, Mon 7 Mar 2011, 9:18, Reply)

The asylum numbers are negligible
but it is an strange thought that someone utterly desperate to escape from an oppressive African country would feel the need to get to the northwestern tip of Europe to seek help rather than the nearest 'safe' country.

I take issue with the legal economic migration from shitholes in eastern Europe far more than a few Somalians, though.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 7 Mar 2011, 9:24, Reply)

It IS strange isn't it,
I can't imagine what is going through those silly little darkies heads when they finally manage to get out of those countries where actually expressing an opinion can lead to you being arrested, tortured and the murdered by the government.

Why would they even consider that they should aim for a country where, should be allowed to stay, they will be giving the best chance for themselves and their families.

Silly darkies.
(Bazongaloid, Mon 7 Mar 2011, 9:27, Reply)

They really are.
What's wrong with Switzerland?
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 7 Mar 2011, 9:31, Reply)

I actually made a sign at work
Explaining the difference between the two, because I'm sick of "....those fucking asylum seekers, coming over here and taking our jobs" or "...those fucking illegal immigrants, coming over here and being showered in benefits!".
(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Mon 7 Mar 2011, 9:25, Reply)

It was Lusty's best friend who has her own toymaking company.
Not quite sure what the point you are trying to make here - is it that this woman is some kind of liar?
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 7 Mar 2011, 9:06, Reply)

Monty, banks loan to make money
if you are running a company and it has cashflow problems but generally your company is healthy most banks would allow you to set up an overdraft, but it will cost you and is unlikely to be set up overnight. Banks don't just throw money at people at short notice.

If you suddenly need £150 for 24 hours then WONGA.com would probably be a better option.

But this is all by the by since the article is about civil servants and has nothing to do with banks.
(Bazongaloid, Mon 7 Mar 2011, 9:13, Reply)

*goes to wonga.com*
She borrowed it off a friend, by the way.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 7 Mar 2011, 9:14, Reply)

Don't its a fucking rip off.
(well in nearly all circumstances, there are some times it's useful)
(PsychoChomp, Mon 7 Mar 2011, 9:15, Reply)

It's only about 3500% interest, isn't it?
I have a cheque for 10k to bank this morning, so I'm OK for now.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 7 Mar 2011, 9:16, Reply)

Well yeah it's fixed charge like £20 for every £100
or some cunt.
(PsychoChomp, Mon 7 Mar 2011, 9:18, Reply)

Yah', but if the Nintendo 3DS comes out on the 26th and payday is on the 28th and you know if you don't get it on the first day it'll sale out and you won't be able to get it 'till the 3rd of April,
then you can borrow £250 (got to get a couple of games with it), then you can pay back £290 when you get paid instead and thus not have to wait two weeks for it to come out and end up being laughed at in the school playground.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 7 Mar 2011, 10:09, Reply)

Yeh', but say you've borrowed a key of coke for a houseparty off a dealer for three grand, hoping to sale it on for £50 a gram....
... making a prophet of two grand, but the party comes along and you get wasted and end up giving it all away and now the dealer is going to get a gang of jamacans to smash your backdoor in who'll pay the dealer £100 per person (thus being 20 goes until the debt is paid), then you can go to Wonga.com and borrow £400 for 30 days and pay back £525 under 5 different names/accounts (the extra £400 is to pay for the new Nintendo 3DS and some games) and thus get to play Street Fighter IV 3D on release day _and_ keep your bumhole's integraty intact.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 7 Mar 2011, 10:14, Reply)

There is a driver where I used to work who is just one exam away from being a "heart doctor", he needs £12k to take the exam, and has been studying for ten years.
When he picks up old ladies from big houses, he tells them that he is driving a cab to pay for the exam, even though he drives 7 days a week.

When I told him my father died of a "Massive cardiac arrest", he said "Oh, that's very terrible", ok, fair enough, I then said he had "a quard-droople bypass in his 50s", he asked me what that was.

I still see him every few months when I order a cab and he picks me up, I swear, if he gives me medical advice, I'm going to the police.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 7 Mar 2011, 9:57, Reply)

But I should point out
that a bank not lending someone £150 is nothing to do with that article.
(Bazongaloid, Mon 7 Mar 2011, 9:04, Reply)

As part of the whole 'small businesses get fucked over' subject
it's marginally relevant.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 7 Mar 2011, 9:10, Reply)

Nope, you're talking about banks addressing the cashflow of a small business
which may be a problem, but since banks got into this mess by lending to businesses that weren't viable, they are now being extra cautious about lending.

The article is about businesses being able to bid for government contracts and that somehow "bureaucrats" are preventing them. Which is just stupid, the fact that small businesses can't guarantee to provide the service that large government contracts require is what's stopping them winning the contracts.

They could of course band together with other small companies, but then you end up creating a large company.
(Bazongaloid, Mon 7 Mar 2011, 9:16, Reply)

Your astute political acumen led to your voting for Nick Clegg
which means you are a dimwit whose opinions are liable to be nonsense.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 7 Mar 2011, 9:18, Reply)

Your astute political acumen
led to you never voting at all, and therefore your opinion is entirely irrelevant. If you're not prepared to put your rhetoric into practice then any criticism you level at any party can be easily dismissed because you didn't do anything to try and change it.
(Bazongaloid, Mon 7 Mar 2011, 9:20, Reply)

There was not a party I could feel comfortable voting for.
The fact that there is no 'none of the above' box to tick and thus I felt unable to make my opinion felt does not mean my views, as opposed to those of some utter mug gulled by a cheesy and dishonest televised debate, should be dismissed.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 7 Mar 2011, 9:28, Reply)

Spoil your ballot slip then

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 7 Mar 2011, 9:31, Reply)

Soil your underpants then

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 7 Mar 2011, 9:32, Reply)

Unless there is a political party called the "Monty Boyce Party"
which stands purely for only the things you want it to stand for, then every vote is always compromise, it's not an excuse for not voting. If you really don't want to vote for anyone then you could always go and spoil your ballot paper, at least that shows engagement in the process.
(Bazongaloid, Mon 7 Mar 2011, 9:35, Reply)

Serious question:
if you spoil your paper does that not mean you just get lumped in with the senile pensioners who've ticked all of them because they are mental etc?
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 7 Mar 2011, 9:38, Reply)

And why would this be out of the norm for you?

( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Mon 7 Mar 2011, 9:39, Reply)

I'm just checking that I'd be representing with my menkle niggaz.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 7 Mar 2011, 9:40, Reply)

It's also that the banks don't like low risk low reward loans.
She'd get more options for a £20k 5 year loan rather than a quicky.
(PsychoChomp, Mon 7 Mar 2011, 9:20, Reply)

Well it's true isn't it,
entrepreneurs don't like following planning codes paying taxes and all that. Doesn't mean they shouldn't have to do it.
(PsychoChomp, Mon 7 Mar 2011, 8:54, Reply)

The first point is bollocks
The second point is probably true, but the third is just stupid, a large business is almost always going to be able to offer lower costs than several smaller companies.

Other than that, it's a Tory PM making statements entirely in line with Tory ideology. Quelle suprise?
(Bazongaloid, Mon 7 Mar 2011, 8:54, Reply)

I love this part:
"I know some people are disdainful about [selling Britain to the world]," he said.

"They see me loading up a plane with businesspeople and say: 'That's not statesmanship, that's salesmanship'. I say this: attack all you want, but do you think the Germans and the French and the Americans are all sitting at home waiting for business to fall into their lap?"

He loaded a fucking plane with arms dealers and took them to Egypt.
(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Mon 7 Mar 2011, 8:56, Reply)

Good place to take them I'd have thought.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 7 Mar 2011, 8:57, Reply)

s'true
I'm slightly torn about the "defence" industry. On one hand, making things designed expressly to kill people isn't very nice, but on the other, people are always going to want to buy weapons and therefore we might as well get a piece of the pie.

What I'm not convinced about though is if these arms companies actually benefit the UK economy overall as they get a lot of their money from government contracts, so it's not really new money.
(Bazongaloid, Mon 7 Mar 2011, 9:02, Reply)

I can't help but think
if some bunch of nutcases want to machine-gun their own citizens or whatever they're hardly going to write the idea off if we refuse to sell them our guns.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 7 Mar 2011, 9:03, Reply)

I just thought it was a very interesting way of putting it.

(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Mon 7 Mar 2011, 9:06, Reply)

They're not actually much use to the economy
the reason they're so loved by governments around the world is that it ring fences a load of highly skilled labour in the country which they don't want to lose.
The problem is their cost/benefit is a lot worse now than when you were hiring mainly machinists and skilled welders.
(PsychoChomp, Mon 7 Mar 2011, 9:10, Reply)

You've pretty much summed it up there
not a nice business, but it does bring in money, if not quite as much as we would like
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Mon 7 Mar 2011, 9:36, Reply)

Lusty's birthday night out (to a truly dire nightclub),
followed by 'back to mine'.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 7 Mar 2011, 8:50, Reply)

Oh dear.
Did she have fun?
(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Mon 7 Mar 2011, 8:52, Reply)

She did indeed.
We all did, despite the shitness of the club.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 7 Mar 2011, 8:54, Reply)

So it's worth feeling a bit shite today then?

(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Mon 7 Mar 2011, 8:57, Reply)

Well worth it, yes.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 7 Mar 2011, 8:57, Reply)

Glad she had a good time
I meant to make it down, but given the work I ended up doing I might as well have.
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Mon 7 Mar 2011, 9:29, Reply)