Exactly.
We suspect that he's just had a massive party all weekend in our house. He certainly didn't stay with his grandparents on Saturday as he was supposed to. Considering the levels of hospitality we've shown to his mates in the past, the utterly contemptible lack of respect that has been shown to us in our absence is completely abhorrent. Never again.

This does mean that I'll probably be in London on my own, while the missus goes to the Galtres festival without me.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 31 May 2011, 14:10, 3 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

Fucking hell fella, that's not good at all
I was always very careful with my parents house, never let it be left in a mess when they came back, except for once.

Their reaction that time ensured it was something I'd never do again.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 31 May 2011, 14:11, Reply)

Fuck me that's shit.

( girlinthehole, Tue 31 May 2011, 14:17, Reply)

Tell me about it.
Practically every cup and glass in the house has been used and are currently piled up in the sink or on the bench; they've been smoking in the house (they know we don't do this so what on earth made them think it was acceptable for them to do it I don't know) and using cups and dishes as ash trays. And haven't even had the fucking common sense to cover their tracks either.

We're livid, utterly livid. On the plus side, at least we came back and the house was still standing.

The missus sends boob squishing hugs, btw.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 31 May 2011, 14:22, Reply)

Surely if nothing has been damaged or stolen you've had a bit of a result

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 31 May 2011, 14:23, Reply)

That is the plus side, yes.
But he was supposed to be staying at a mate's on Friday and his grandparents on Saturday. It's the deceit and lies that we can't stomach; at least one of the mates he said was here we don't even know, and, like I say, we've shown huge hospitality to his mates in the past and this is how they repay it.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 31 May 2011, 14:28, Reply)

The only thing for it is to take his keys off him and say that if you aren't in the house then neither is he.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 31 May 2011, 14:32, Reply)

This is what we will be doing.

( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 31 May 2011, 14:37, Reply)

I'm speechless.
What must have possessed him?

Edit: received and returned DG,
( girlinthehole, Tue 31 May 2011, 14:24, Reply)

God knows.
It galls me to think that we're not going to get weekends away together for the foreseeable future because the little sod can't be trusted to stay where he's supposed to be staying. I think his key will be coming off him forthwith.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 31 May 2011, 14:30, Reply)

How old is he?

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 31 May 2011, 14:30, Reply)

15.

( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 31 May 2011, 14:31, Reply)

Oh fucking hell I was on the major rampage at 15.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 31 May 2011, 14:32, Reply)

Fucking hell, the only reason I even knew what a proper party was at that age was due to having older siblings

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 31 May 2011, 14:37, Reply)

Devil's Advocaat and all that:
My brother and I were trusted with my parents' house when they went away from when I was about 15. Never once did we repay the trust given us - we had fornight-long parties inc indoor smoking, we brewed up magic mushrooms in my mother's preserving pans and at one point made a Dream Machine (see Brion Gysin) out of my father's record player. And all this from our house right in the middle of Winchester College - a massive security breach.

We did have the sense to tidy up afterwards though - but maybe things just got out of hand. You have to slightly high-five the lad, surely?

At least he's not a billy no-mates loser.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 31 May 2011, 14:32, Reply)

www.youtube.com/watch?v=iKb3J9mctlo
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 31 May 2011, 14:35, Reply)

No, he's been a little shit, Monty.
He wasn't even trusted with the house, he was supposed to be staying elsewhere and he knew he wasn't meant to have any mates around while we weren't there but still did it anyway.

Any of his mates that come round will receive a royal bollocking for their part in it. Not that they're actually welcome here anymore.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 31 May 2011, 14:36, Reply)

Has the bollocking (I assume) you've already given him sunk in at all.
Or does he think you're making a big deal out of nothing?
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 31 May 2011, 14:37, Reply)

He hasn't surfaced yet, so I'm not sure.
He did tidy the living room and cleaned outside last night, but the dishes are still waiting to be done.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 31 May 2011, 14:39, Reply)

Oh mate don't be too harsh on him.
I'm sure you did some stupid shit at that age, no?
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 31 May 2011, 14:43, Reply)

Shut up Monty
This is the closest I'll get to child abuse.

PUNCH HIM IN THE FACE DAVROS!

WHIP HIS BALLS WITH THE BUCKLE END OF YOUR BELT!
(Bazongaloid, Tue 31 May 2011, 14:44, Reply)

AND FILM IT ALL!!!!!

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 31 May 2011, 14:48, Reply)

And you were suitably punished I hope?
The thing is that when you have parents like DG and Sweary who are open-minded, free-thinking and willing to give you some freedom in spreading your teenage wings, to repay them in such a way is downright despicable.
( girlinthehole, Tue 31 May 2011, 14:44, Reply)

No, we weren't ever really punished beyond having a serious talk about stuff.
My parents were trendy liberals and we were left to do what we wanted, to quite an extent. I never got grounded - but then I never really got caught. Except for once when I had 15 foil-wrapped hash cakes in my wardrobe. Even then I was a criminal genius:

'Why have you got them, and in such large quantities?'

'I don't smoke, do I?'
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 31 May 2011, 14:50, Reply)

Davros. Take a good look at Monty and his life.
If you don't crack down on SJ hard, this is what he will end up like.
(Bazongaloid, Tue 31 May 2011, 14:52, Reply)

That's a fair point.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 31 May 2011, 14:57, Reply)

I have already said in no uncertain terms
that I don't give a shit what he does when he leaves school, but doing nothing whilst living in our house is not an option.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 31 May 2011, 14:58, Reply)

As BGB says
We are quite liberal with him. Some of his mates are given a hard time by their parents for nothing; others parents just don't seem to give a shit either way. They all say they love coming to ours because of how relaxed it is, and this is our reward for being cool with them.

Little fuckstarts.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 31 May 2011, 14:55, Reply)

No, because I knew that I would be beaten from here until next Sunday if I did.
My Gran asked me to stay at hers while she was away for a couple of nights when I was 16 and said I could have a mate over as well. A bunch of people got wind of this; I found out, rang one of them and told him I wasn't staying over anymore because I new what would probably happen.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 31 May 2011, 14:51, Reply)

If he accidentally sets fire to the living room rug when he's fifteen years old.
Don't be too hard on him.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 31 May 2011, 14:55, Reply)

Hehe!
And how did you manage that?
( girlinthehole, Tue 31 May 2011, 14:57, Reply)

I went back in time in a Delorean
And got my parents together and then, as I was about go back to 1985 I remembered getting a bollocking so I thought I'd mention it, just in case they eased off a little.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 31 May 2011, 14:58, Reply)

That's not a Devils Advocaat, or even Advocat.
That's just confirming that you and your brother were little cunts when you were younger.
(Bazongaloid, Tue 31 May 2011, 14:37, Reply)

Advocaat....
This things just snowball.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 31 May 2011, 14:38, Reply)

We were stupid cunts rather than proper cunts, I think.
EDIT: our parents never actually said we couldn't have parties. They just assumed we wouldn't and, never finding out, had no reason to.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 31 May 2011, 14:41, Reply)

Devil's Advocaat: A yellow drink made in Holland by satanists, from lawyers.

(BrianHequator was stretching owls, on, or around, Tue 31 May 2011, 14:42, Reply)

It's fucking filth.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 31 May 2011, 14:43, Reply)

It looks suitably wrong that I've never been tempted to try it.
A mate swears that it's the business on Christmas pud though. Not sure about that to be honest ...
(BrianHequator was stretching owls, on, or around, Tue 31 May 2011, 14:45, Reply)

I'd rather eat elephant poo than Christmas pudding.
I have a fruit salad. With cream and either brandy or Cointreau butter.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 31 May 2011, 14:53, Reply)

Christ, change the locks.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Tue 31 May 2011, 14:19, Reply)