Jesting aside
best of luck with it all. My experience was pretty fucking weird - I was there for the birth but we were well split up by then. We had a major scare just after the birth but I'll spare you the story 'til such time as it won't give you nightmares.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 16:42, 2 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

Oooh! Check out Nick Ross with his 'please, don't have nightmares' bollocks ^.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 16:43, Reply)

Cheers mate, looking forward to meeting the little blighter now
Got nearly all of our stuff, prams and car seats etc, so we are about as ready as one can be...also i'll have three weeks off from work in the summer!
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 16:44, Reply)

I was at a baby shower yesterday, they passed out cards for us to write our advice on them
I wrote "don't look at the placenta"
( Lisette von Falcon, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 16:46, Reply)

You should have said "Try not to scream as your vagina tears"

(Bazongaloid, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 16:48, Reply)

Apparently you don't really feel it...
Also tearing is better than cutting as your muscels tear along the muscle fibres, not across them and healing is therefore quicker
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 16:50, Reply)

What do you care.
It's not like it's you vadge, is it.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 16:51, Reply)

Is that true?
it certainly makes sense I suppose.
(Bazongaloid, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 16:53, Reply)

Yeah, I know more than any man should about womans vajayjays now

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 16:56, Reply)

"Try not to be embarrassed as all your straining causes you to shit in front of a crowd"

( Kroney, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 16:50, Reply)

I say that to all my 'chicks'

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 16:52, Reply)

my friend Laura, had her baby in april, her baby tore her a new one
lol
( Lisette von Falcon, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 16:52, Reply)

childbirth is gross

( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 16:53, Reply)

You're better off concentrating on getting yourself fingered.

(Bazongaloid, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 16:54, Reply)

Still working on it
next meeting isn't until September though :(
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 16:55, Reply)

it's not so bad
it's just awkward when the doctor is all "look, here's the head" and all you see is squishy vagina

the placenta is disgusting, the doctor swung it like a lasso and plopped it in a pan and started poking it, I thought I was going to puke
( Lisette von Falcon, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 16:56, Reply)

That doctor sounds awesome.

( Kroney, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 16:57, Reply)

We're not having one, it seems a little crass IMHO
I really don't understand everyones fascination with the placenta, it's just a big sloppy scab in the making
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 16:48, Reply)

i think you have to have a placenta
it's kind of obigatory
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 16:49, Reply)

You find Plancentas a little crass?

(Bazongaloid, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 16:50, Reply)

Yes - they're not having one, because everyone has one and it's a bit passe.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 16:51, Reply)

It really is, certainly in this country.
My friends had one but I boycotted it as I felt that whilst I was going to buy their child a present I didn't want to feel pressured into it. Plus it was their second child and therefore they had most things anyway, the greedy cunts.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 16:50, Reply)

Succinctly put as ever
i will buy someone a present because I want to, not because it is expected due to the occasion
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 16:52, Reply)

how do you feed your baby then?
stuffing fresh veg up her vagoo?
( Lisette von Falcon, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 16:51, Reply)

I do that anyway.

(Bazongaloid, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 16:53, Reply)

that's exactly it

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 27 Jun 2011, 16:55, Reply)