About the only weird thing I've had turn up recently was a business card.
It said something along the lines of (stress not my own)

"Sorry, I've missed you. No doubt you're still looking through our catalogue trying to decide which services you'd like to use. Please leave the COMPLETE PACKAGE outside your front door THIS EVENING between 6PM AND 9PM and I will pick it up.

Steve"

I feel like leaving a note outside with

"Dear Steve,

Thank you for your unsolicited hawking. I have thrown your COMPLETE PACKAGE in the BIN and so shall not be leaving it outside my door THIS EVENING or indeed any other. Kindly FUCK OFF and do not attempt to sell me ANYTHING in future"

written on it.
( Kroney, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 12:00, 3 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

We would totally do that
but we are curmudgeonly old gits.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Thu 30 Jun 2011, 12:04, Reply)

Do it
You have my full approval for this.
If Steve complains, tell him I said it was ok.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 12:04, Reply)

PS here's a'bot dog' for you to chew on, you ghastly bender.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 12:28, Reply)

What's a bot dog?
I'm too afraid to google it.
(The Luggage is haunted..., Thu 30 Jun 2011, 12:31, Reply)

Ask Kroney

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 12:31, Reply)

An Under-the-Trouser Schnauzer

( Kroney, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 12:32, Reply)

A bog log
A jean bean
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 12:34, Reply)

Gotcha.
Does it have to be left in a tupperware, or will a handbag suffice?
(The Luggage is haunted..., Thu 30 Jun 2011, 12:40, Reply)

It is better taken raw

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 12:41, Reply)

Google won't help - I made it up myself.
It's where one shits in a baguette and gives it to someone one dislikes. Like a hot dog, but with a pooey twist. A faecal relative to the horse's head in the bed.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 30 Jun 2011, 12:55, Reply)