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(, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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Man has been to the Moon
and didn't find anything there. Of course I'm discounting the Sunday Sport's claims that there was a Routemaster up there...

Anyway, should we fund a return to the Moon or should we explore the deep seas?
And whichever you think, how should we do it? Describe your craft.

Alt: Blue Peter or Magpie?
(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:01, 130 replies, latest was 14 years ago)
Alt: did you get Joey Deacon on Magpie? No you did not.

(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:04, Reply)
This is true
and that's why the whole Joey Deacon thing has passed me by. :(
(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:16, Reply)
Do you know what? I'm going to look on YouTube and see what I've been missing.

(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:17, Reply)
Susan Stranks was the only reason I watched magpie.
With her wayward, black and white boobies.
(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:20, Reply)
I never knew she was mixed race.
Did one of her tits dispense chocolate milk?
(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 18:12, Reply)
Was Magpie on ITV?
If so, that explains why I never saw it more than once or twice: my mother told me we couldn't get ITV on our television and I believed her until I was about 6.
(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:21, Reply)
But you see BBC showed Grange Hill
and my father wouldn't not countenance me watching such common children who were at a comprehensive school in case I got 'ideas'.
(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:24, Reply)
I wasn't allowed to watch it as it was 'common'

(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:25, Reply)
Worrying about being common is common

(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:33, Reply)
*loots*

(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:36, Reply)
My mother just didn't approve of all the advertising, I think.

(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:42, Reply)
Both, I'm sure if we cut defence spending we could do both very easily
/hippy.

The Yellow Submarine, in both cases.
(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:05, Reply)
And when the aliens attack
WHAT THEN?
(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:33, Reply)
They win.
Like they would anyway. Anyone with good enough technology to get here, has good enough technology to defeat us without trying.
(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:40, Reply)
I reckon if they've got here
then they don't want war
(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:42, Reply)
they want our water

(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:44, Reply)
There's better planets than Earth for that I'm sure

(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:45, Reply)
the chances of anything coming here
are a million to one
(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:46, Reply)
but if they did
they could splat us if they wanted too, no matter how many times we sent up Geoff Goldbum with a fucking macbook, so why worry.
(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:47, Reply)
I'm harbouring as many diseases
as possible to fight them

/overstretching war of the worlds references
(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:52, Reply)
Yeah, coz that's going to happen.
I'm trying to think of a realistic First Contact film. I'm failing. I'm sure there are books.
(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:56, Reply)
The Sparrow

(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:58, Reply)
The slightly lower budgeted follow up to The Crow.

(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 18:10, Reply)
I has been lent it.
No idea when I'll get to it though.
(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 18:15, Reply)
I just finished listening to Childhood's End by Arthur C Clarke, as recommended by gonz, a a couple of days ago.
Brilliant stuff.
(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 18:17, Reply)
there was loads of shit up there
just no aliens or canals or space calves. Hell yeah we should go back I'm going in a big spherical pod covered in that anti-gravity stuff and I'm taking brandy and a good book

alt: blue peter, obvs
(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:06, Reply)
You could call the antigrav stuff Cavyrite.

(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:12, Reply)
YAY!
also yay, I now remember what it was called
(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:12, Reply)
We should do both, funded by removing the funding from looting chavs.
I don't know what the outside would like, for either craft, but the inside would look like a medium sized gentlemen's withdrawing room.
(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:16, Reply)
I don't think chav looting is actually funded.

(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:25, Reply)
Well, it should be.
Damn it I want a grant so I can go and loot some chavs.

I'll steal their bling and sell it to buy books.
(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:27, Reply)
This is a good plan

(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:37, Reply)
Damn right it is.
But thanks for the validation anyways.
(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:41, Reply)
If you removed their benefits, you would be quids in.

(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:29, Reply)
yeah because then they'd defintely
stop stealing stuff
(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:32, Reply)
I don't think so.
But they would be stealing to support themselves, which would be harder.
(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:34, Reply)
Pinko Lefty, shut you mouth with your logic.

(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:35, Reply)
I honestly don't care what's in the sea.
We know the sea and we've seen things from the sea. Anything else we could find would just be more freakier looking fucking fish or some shit. Anything we find on the moon would be an alien and far cooler.

Alt: I had to google Magpie so I'll have to go for Blue Peter.
(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:16, Reply)
there are far more alien things in the depths of the sea than on the moon

(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:27, Reply)
nautilus fives

(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:28, Reply)
I have taken delivery of a lovely hardback copy of 20,000 leagues.
very nice
(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:30, Reply)
I have one of those.
I love a nice book. Kindle Schmindle, I say - despite the massive advantages of having one for holidays.
(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:44, Reply)
I bought a very nice 6 book edition of Verne just the other week.

(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:55, Reply)
I don't doubt it. It's all about location.
I'm sure new species of fish are discovered all the time but that doesn't pique my sense of wonder as much as if you found that same fish on the moon.
(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:37, Reply)
they'd be crap fish
there's no water
(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:38, Reply)
Fish surviving without water? ALIEN FISH!
See? There's so much we don't know.

we I
(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:41, Reply)
But how would they have got there?
The number 9 bus doesn't go that far!
(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:38, Reply)
There's some seriously interesting shit going on with bryozoa
and new therapuetics, particularly antibiotics. See also marine extremophiles. So, the sea is more likely to eventually cure your* crippling knobrot

*nothing personal. this is a generic "your".
(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:28, Reply)
pssst
he does have crippling knobrot
(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:29, Reply)
HOW WOULD YOU KNOW?
bender
(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:30, Reply)
I'm his doctor

(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:31, Reply)
*feels both hands on my shoulders*
How are you taking my temperature again?
(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:39, Reply)
Anally with his cock

(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:39, Reply)
THAT'S THE oh for God's sake.

(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:45, Reply)
and those extremophile dudes
might give us a clue to how life works and can work on other planets
(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:29, Reply)
yeah
much more than the nothing that lives on the moon can tell us
(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:30, Reply)
Maybe
but almost certainly not. We're too obsessed with potential alien life-forms being carbon-based for a start. No reason they should be. Except there aren't any, of course.
(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:33, Reply)
I reckon they'll be Unobtanium based
with an Adamantium shell
(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:38, Reply)
I cannot believe you people.
There are 'extremophiles' lurking on our planet with easy access to schools etc and you're all just standing by? We need an *insert paedo victim's name*'s Law (c) - and we need to BURN THEIR HOUSES DOWN.
(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:47, Reply)
*clicks*

(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:49, Reply)
haha.
those fuckers can molest children at over 100 degrees C and under ridiculous pressure. WILL NO-ONE THINK OF THE CHILDREN?
(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:53, Reply)
I bet there are more interesting things in the sea than on the Moon

(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:28, Reply)
Two weeks ago I sat next to Janet Ellis in my local cafe
She didn't shit on the floor though
(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:27, Reply)
Did she immediately offer her back doors for booting in?
A dirty one, that Ellis.
(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:28, Reply)
Well Ray Stubbs was on my other side so i imagine they were having some sort BBC 1
backdoor smashing in affair
(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:30, Reply)
There are far more pressing problems than sending a tin can to a dead lump or having Rob Ballard loot graves and tell us it's all dark down there

(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:31, Reply)
We should explore that there "East london"
who knows what mineral treasures we'll find
(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:32, Reply)
erm here's a map of Shadwell
I'LLMEETYOUDOWNTHEREAFTERWORK
(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:36, Reply)
name 5

(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:32, Reply)
Your mum

(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:33, Reply)
Your mums minge

(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:33, Reply)
That Indiana Jones Crystal Skull shit

(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:34, Reply)
Street cut charly

(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:34, Reply)
overpopulationlols

(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:35, Reply)
That's four.
I win.
(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:35, Reply)
YOU LOSE

(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:37, Reply)
:(

(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:41, Reply)
touche

(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:34, Reply)
That's a fucking stupid reason.
The human race is quite capable of focusing on more than one thing at a time. It's like saying don't research a cure for AIDS concentrate on cancer. and that's taking an example where the same people could be useful to both. I doubt many rocket scientists and astrophysists would be useful solving teen pregnancy or world hunger.
(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:37, Reply)
Dunno we've hit seven billion with ten on the horizon
No particular means to support that mind, dwindling resources, any mass produced alternative to the internal combustion engine anyone??
(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:40, Reply)
Fuel cells, developed by the space race.
And your argument that we're outgrowing this planet, actually says we should look for external sources of materials and eventually colonisation.
(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:41, Reply)
fuel cells either use hydrogen, which is as much use as chocolate fireguard for mass transport
or bacteria, in which case they don't work.
(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:43, Reply)
your second point is a valid one, though.
The only way that human population will continue to expand is another source of resources, or extraterrestrial colonisation. The problem is that we think we're cleverer than we are, we think we're more important than we are, and we hugely underestimate what a bunch of selfish cunts we are. Preservation of resources for future generations? Like fuck. You'll sooner see Monty listening to Boyzone.
(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:47, Reply)
I don't see the problem with Hydrogen as a fuel stuff.
Production is a problem at the moment but there was just a few days ago a study about a new enzyme discovered to catalise the production from water. Transport and storage is not beyond current tech.
(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:48, Reply)
the amount of activation energy necessary to separate H from O in water is astronomical.
So, we aren't going to overcome that. Not even with some funky enzyme. And every other source of H2 is, one way or another, a limited resource.

Production is not ever going to stop being a problem because from a chemical energy point of view it's hideously unfavourable.
(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:51, Reply)
I prefer the more realistic 'massive population culling through the magic of genocide'

(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:51, Reply)
'The Magic of Genocide'
This 12 part magazine builds into a unique collection which celebrates this unique form of population control and unreasonable hatred.

Part one on Ethnic Cleansing is just £1.99 from all good newsagents
(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:55, Reply)
and comes free with this replica canister of Zyklon B

(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 18:09, Reply)
I am SO pitching this to DeAgostini.

(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 18:11, Reply)
"I love Nazis
best of all the jewkillers
I love Nazis
They're my friends"
(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 18:17, Reply)
*Googles*


*gutted*
(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 18:10, Reply)
Yeah right the Gwizz has really taken off
How much carbon based energy is used to produce all these 'alternatives' in the first instance...
(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:42, Reply)
population is self-levelling from an evolutionary point of view.
bollocks to trying to support it. Accept that it can't be supported.
(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:42, Reply)
The self levelling in this instance being wars over food and water supplies
The time to planning the worlds population growth passed some time ago
(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:46, Reply)
that's how every single other species in the history of evolution has done it.
resources vs population size. Our problem is arrogance in believing we're better than that. We aren't.
(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:49, Reply)
Anyway bring it on, no Chinkys gonna nab my dog without a fight

(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:54, Reply)
That's the spirit.

(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 18:01, Reply)
Nature is good at thinning us out though
Yay for drought and disease.
(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:45, Reply)
Don't forget genocide.
Nommy, nommy genocide.
(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:52, Reply)
it's like the equivalent of buying a house on a busy busy main road
and then getting a trusting miaowing little pet that likes to be outside... but has no chance of learning the green cross code... or of pressing the buttons on the pedestrian crossing without opposable thumbs...
(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 18:06, Reply)
Astrophysicists are brilliant at cutting down teen pregnancy
cos not even the worst chav hippocrocopig would fuck one.
(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:41, Reply)
RIiiiiiiIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIBS!
And white wine. And Dr. Strangelove or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Bomb.
(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:53, Reply)
I have not see this
and feel like I should
(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:55, Reply)
you should.

(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:56, Reply)
This is my first time
and honestly, half way through and I'm intrigued. I get the feeling Peter Sellers is a ghost though, or there's no chance he'll work out which is human and which is replicant, or maybe the alien will get him at the end. IT'S AL SO CONFUSING.
(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:57, Reply)
Plus, a stormtrooper bumps his head.


^SPOILARRRR
(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:58, Reply)
Oh man, you've totally ruined that bit for me now.
Bruce Willis is a gay, the Decepticons are really black market truffle dealers and Harry Potter eventually turns out to be the the root of all apathy.
(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:59, Reply)
My father went on and on about how great Dr Strangelove was.
Perhaps at the time it came out - but by when I got around to watching it, I found it to be 'Fuckynge Shytte'.
(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:56, Reply)
Colour me surprised.
What was the last thing you noted was "fucking superb" that wasn't some kind of new fangled drug?
(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:57, Reply)
Film-wise?
I know it's hardly new but when I saw 'In Bruges' I was surprised how much I liked it given that that terrible padraig is in it.

TV-wise: I found 'Sherlock' to be simply excellent.

Music-wise: Edan's 'Echo Party' DVD/mix.

Aggressive anal sex-wise: I found your mum to be more than superb.
(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 18:00, Reply)
She fucking loves it, the slag.
I meant generally, but it's nice to see you can see the "fucking superb" in life as well as the "fucking shit". How's your stuff generally? I pay far less attention to this place than I used to, but I do miss you all still. Sometimes. Occasionally. Maybe every now and again.
(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 18:02, Reply)
It's only ever disappointment at how shit most things are
when compared to what I really love, that leads to my scorn.

I'm not tooo bad, although missing Lusters as she is in CANADA. How're you?
(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 18:04, Reply)
Thriving ol' boy, new job in September, proper helpful therapy with light at the end of the tunnel, almost enough money to go and see the missus in October as planned.
Life is levelling out. Did you get all your money shit together?
(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 18:09, Reply)
We should look elsewhere to live because when the sun goes nova earth is going to be fried.
Magpie! More hip than Blue Peter and better theme tune.
(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:55, Reply)
Hey bgb.
I don't care much for Blue Peter any more, not since they got rid of that fit one. You know the one. Blonde. GOLDIE! That's the one. How're you?
(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:56, Reply)
Jefflols!
I'm doing OK sweetie.

Happy happy joy joy!
(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:58, Reply)
It's the intensive fingering you've been receiving.

(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:59, Reply)
Probably!

(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 18:01, Reply)
1. Sarah Greene
2. Pool table
3. Rugby team
4. ??????
5. PROFIT
(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:57, Reply)
Surely that's more urban myth than Dizzie Rascal with a lisp after a sex change?

(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 17:59, Reply)
I'm not sure I could have made that more contrived if I'd tried.

(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 18:01, Reply)
Haha I admire your valiant efforts.

(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 18:02, Reply)
we're wasted on these people, Monters.

(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 18:02, Reply)
They'd miss us if we de-camped to the special secret board for cool people.

(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 18:05, Reply)
Noooooooooooo!

(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 18:07, Reply)

Greene Beenie

BONGLE
(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 18:00, Reply)
DEF CON BONGLE, PEOPLE.

(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 18:01, Reply)
WOOP! WOOP! WOOP!

(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 18:02, Reply)
'Ello 'ello 'ello. Wot's all this then?

(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 18:08, Reply)
Oh you bastard.
Nurse! Close the curtains and leave me be for fifteen minutes, would you please? Ta.
(, Tue 16 Aug 2011, 18:14, Reply)

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